When my nightmare and all the painful things began to happen in my life here at Nightcrawler Pack, I wished and hoped for my own wolf. I kept dreaming, hoping that a miracle would happen to me one day.

But I stopped sooner.

I gave up and accepted that my wish would never be fulfilled. It will never be realized. It is my life's reality. But now that my desire has come true, what should I do?

When a wolf unexpectedly claimed me as its host, I was perplexed. After all, don't wolves and werewolves share a common ancestor? Why is the wolf who claims to be mine not inside me? Furthermore, because of its unusual eye color and fur, I'm unsure whether to call this animal a wolf or a beast.

I might not have noticed the wolf strolling toward me, exposing its appearance, if it hadn't been for the moonlight. It had glistening black fur that blended into the darkness. Apart from that, it had gleaming red eyes that resembled blood.

All wolves, including alphas and other dominant members of a pack, have golden eyes and varying colors of white, grey, or brown fur.

As a result, this wolf is unique.

"What exactly do you mean? A holy wolf?" I mumbled something. "What exactly was it?" I wondered as I continued to watch the red-eyed wolf.

'I am a sacred wolf because I am the offspring of the moon goddess and the lycan god,' it said again in my mind.

Prior to that night, when everything was normal, I had researched other species such as vampires, lycans, witches, and other beings. Being abused kept me from getting a werewolf education. Regardless, I had no idea the moon goddess and the lycan god had had a child.

"So you're without a host? How did it happen to be me?" Perplexed by this discovery, I inquired. Sincerity be damned, I have no idea where this courage is coming from, knowing that I am speaking to an unusual, and somewhat frightening-looking wolf. At the very least, it wasn't a rogue.

'It's simple, and it's because I chose you,' she says. The wolf spoke up.

I was speechless, possibly because the red-eyed wolf was speaking to me in my head as it stood there like a statue staring down at me.

"So, are you a lycan or a wolf?" I asked again, remembering what it said about being the offspring of the moon goddess and the lycan god.

'Both,' said the wolf in response. I kept silent and just stared at its majestic form.

How can I be certain that this beast didn't pick me at random? I reasoned that because the entire confession didn't seem true to me, "I mean, I'm frail. Nobody wants to pick me. Nobody has ever dared to want me."

The thought of an odd beast claiming to be mine makes me feel foolish because I am the weakest member of the Nightcrawler Pack... or, to put it another way, the entire werewolf community.

'Stop!' The wolf abruptly cried out. I groaned because its voice was so loud. 'Do not describe yourself as weak! It was never a mistake to choose you!' Outside, the beast snarled menacingly while sternly speaking in my head.

"But," I grumbled.

'We are all one. As I previously stated, you are both my host and my partner. Please stop second-guessing yourself. You are deserving.' Sure, the wolf was attempting to calm my nerves. 'I've known about you, the moon goddess, and the lycan god since your birth. Our parents created you for me. You were mine, and that's why you've never had a wolf.' The wolf went on.

The other two are gods, whereas the first two are average. My family consists of four parents. But, given their treatment of me, I doubt they still regard me as their child.

"Why are you calling me right now? Why don't you live inside me from the start?" With a scowl, I inquired.

'Because of my power, you were too young to contain and control me at the time, but you are now mature enough. You're mature enough to have me. The gods had sealed my fate. I've spoken to others, but you are the first of your generation.' The creature raised its voice.

"Sealed? What exactly do you mean?" I inquired.

'Yes, I was sealed. I am more powerful than my parents, and I require the services of a host to manage my abilities.'

"I don't get it," I puzzledly asked.

'I was created many years ago by the lycan god and moon goddess. I was strong, but I didn't have a host, or a partner, to speak of. Someone should rule over a wolf like me. My lack of one was the reason I was secretly sealed. The moon goddess and the lycan god decided to keep my identity hidden. But I wasn't a secret anymore. When other supernatural gods learned about me, they decided to end my life, but they were unable to do so. They couldn't handle my terrifying and powerful abilities. As a result, they decided to find hosts to command me. Each god created his or her own host. But as I got closer to any of them, they all died or surrendered to me. When it was the moon goddess' turn to create, she chose not to include a wolf. And you are the chosen one. The one who will not perish or surrender in front of me. And because I am half lycan, the lycan god will bestow his bloodline on me to serve as a link between the lycans and you.'

The explanation was lengthy, as was the silence.

"But why is this the case now? And since you mentioned knowing me, I'm guessing you're aware that our mate has already rejected us?" I inquired, breaking the silence.

'He's not my pal.' The wolf responded quickly. I was taken aback by what she said, and the beast looked perplexed. 'Any supernatural being could be my mate. I am aware of Samson and your sister, and I am disgusted by them.'

Because of what the wolf said, I can't help but recall my intense dislike for Samson. Was this due to the wolf?

'Always remember that you are not weak. You are more powerful than everyone else, and even more powerful than I am. You put up with the abusive pack for so long, and despite being rejected, you didn't kill yourself. I expected to be too late, but thank God I wasn't. Pay attention to what I'm saying; you're as strong as you are. You are powerful whether you have a wolf or not.'

I sensed a glimmer of hope, a glimmer of strength in the depths of my heart's darkness. I wanted to cry when I heard those words. For the first time, someone believed in me and supported me.

I've been waiting for those words for how long?

Who would have guessed it would come from a wolf—my wolf—rather than anyone else? I knew deep down that I, too, deserved to be loved.

'Nikky, you are strong. You are powerful. You are stronger when you are with me, and we are the strongest when we are together.'

I nodded, dabbing my tears with my calloused hands. The beast makes an excellent point. I am the only one who requires my assistance.

Someone offered me comfort for the first time in a long time. Even though this creature wasn't there for me when things got tough, it gave me something invaluable.

"I've made my decision. I'm going to run away." As my fists formed into a ball, I said.

This is something I've always wanted to do. To flee my gruesome past, I ran away. I desired to depart and forge a new identity. I want a better future, which I won't be able to have if I stay here.

I asked the wolf if he would accompany me without saying anything. After bending its large head forward, it quickly placed its large forehead against mine. I closed my eyes in delight at the unexpected encounter.

"What a nice feeling," I remarked.

'I shall always be within you,' the beast's voice said to me. 'Do not oppose my existence, Nikky,' something entered my body.

Something was going on in my body, particularly in my mind. It lingered in my recollections and ideas, like a good memory.

When I opened my eyes, the room's window was already empty, as if the dark beast that had been there moments before had been a dream. My attention was drawn to my body due to a sting on my back. I winced at the sensation.

I could feel the slices of the silver whip closing up. Wounds on my arm that had previously opened were suddenly closing as if they had never existed.

The aroma of the forest and the smell of dirt took my attention away from the wounds. I noticed that the smell of the trees was stronger than before.

But I was taken aback by what I saw. My physical appearance...

My brown eyes had turned a brilliant violet. My lifeless, drab black hair became shiny and vibrant. I swung my body from left to right and noticed that I wasn't in any pain.

'You inherited the lycan god's bloodline. That's why your appearance has changed.' The beast spoke to me in my dreams. I couldn't help but pause when I realized the wolf had already taken up residence within me.

The beast then reminded me of the ceremony, so I went there right away. Later, I heard a round of applause. 'I guess it's time to leave this place,' I thought as I walked away from the mirror and toward the double doors.

I took a step back and a step forward toward the adventure of my new life. Of course, I never failed to look at the moon.

Before I set out to run the pack's border trail, I heard Samson's father say, "Nightcrawler Pack, here's to your new Alpha and Luna!"

This is the end of the Nightcrawler Pack.

I fled to my new life.

When I hesitated, my fist was millimeters away from hitting the punching bag. As I exhaled raggedly, my chest heaved from exhaustion. I shifted my gaze away from the punching bag and toward the clock on the other side of the wall. It was only seven o'clock in the morning, but I had been working out since four. I decided to do this because I was having trouble sleeping. The voices and the dreams... they never leave me. They're still with me.

I straightened up and gave Leonard a blank look. I noticed him looking at me right away. "You know what, Nikky? Everyone now fears you. All of the packs we've trained, including their alphas, are terrified of your strength "He chuckled before turning his light blue gaze to the clock.

I ignored him and removed the boxing gloves from my fists. I moved away from the punching bag and over to the bench where my bottle of water was. "Nikky, did you have another nightmare?" he asked as he sat beside me. He appeared to be very concerned.

I gave Leonard a look to let him know that, yes, I was having another nightmare. "Do you mean them?" He asked, his gaze fixed on mine.

"Yes."

This guy really knows how to read me.

"You're aware that there is therapy in the pack, but I can't make you go, and I know you won't." He sighed, as if expecting it. "Not even your father can make you." He went on. I now have an adoptive father and a much better family.

"I told you I didn't need it," I said as I stood up to stretch my muscles, bending backward to stretch my abs and forward to stretch my back.

"There you go again with your monotonous voice! Because of this, the pack members fear you! That, I believe, is also why you don't have any friends." Leonard screamed.

"I don't need friends or approval from anyone. I've got Beatrice, my father, and you. And, to be honest, that's all I need." I adjusted my posture and said.

"I know, but don't you want someone to cling to when the night is cold?" Leonard started teasing me.

"Shut up or I'll punch your face," I jokingly threatened. He really enjoys teasing me about my mate and finding the one.

He then raised both of his hands in surrender to me "Please be gentle with me, sis. You already know that all I want to see is you happy and... in love!" He immediately fled after saying those final words. I sighed and laughed at his actions.

I haven't seen Nightcrawler Pack in five years. I was able to stop being abused and tortured five years later. I became one with my fearful wolf, Serenity, after Samson rejected me.

It's been five years since the Knights found me unconscious in the woods. I've been a member of their family for five years. Then, three years ago, I became the best pack warrior and trainer in the werewolf community, earning the moniker 'The Sanguinex,' a Latin word for 'bloodlust.'

And it's been two years since the supernatural community first became aware of my existence. I gained the status of a sacred entity thanks to Leonard, and I began to understand the benefits and drawbacks of my ability.

Werewolves have superhuman strength, speed, and vision. My unusual existence, on the other hand, has more to offer. Leonard has tried to make me less aloof and fearful.

In the werewolf community, my name is associated with violence, rage, and fear. Everyone is afraid of me. Only the Mountain Black Pack has seen me in my wolf form because I don't shift. I fight in my human form. My wolf genes provide my strength, speed, and vision in the absence of Serenity's abilities. Everyone knew I could fight rogues viciously without the help of my beast. All of this would not be possible without the Knights' assistance.

My adoptive father, Elder Lionel White, and Leonard discovered me unconscious in the Mountain Black Pack's perimeter. It had been a month since I had left the Nightcrawler Pack at the time. I don't have any supplies of food or clothing with me. The Nightcrawler Pack had left me hungry, so my body was weak. I was traveling with Serenity's assistance when I passed out one day.

Despite the fact that Serenity is a scared wolf, my body is incapable of withstanding her strength. Lionel and Leonard drove me to the pack hospital, where I was finally treated. One month later, I awoke. Serenity claimed that my body was too frail and had grown accustomed to her presence.

The pack saw no danger in me. Even if I am, death will quickly become my friend. The Mountain Black Pack is the dominant pack in werewolf society. That's because the people who live here are the werewolf community's elders. They make the rules that werewolves must follow in society. There is nothing else like it.

They have only trained men as fighters. My adoptive mother, Beatrice, is the only female in the pack. She is not my father's friend. Her father and she are siblings. Leonard's biological mother died during his birth.

Dad and Leonard did not inquire about my identification, instead claiming that I was deceased and lacked motivation. They let me stay in the pack because I had nowhere else to go, and I gratefully accepted. They provided me with a comfortable room and food. Serenity remained silent at the time, stating that she wanted me to make my own discoveries and that she wanted to know if the Moon Goddess had sent her the right person.

I was dying quietly. But then Serenity assured me that she would always be inside of me. I knew I needed Serenity to help me fix my life after regaining all of my strength.

I reclined on the unexpectedly comfortable bed. My sleeping bag, I suppose, became a part of me. I heard footsteps outside the door before getting out of bed. I greeted him cheerfully. Elder Lionel White was the person who assisted me along the way.

He gave me a serious look as he spoke the words that would change my life forever. "Are you going to give up?"

I gave him an uneasy look.

"Those scars on your body are evidence of abuse; you successfully fled your abuser, but why do you appear to be about to give up now?" His candor astounded me. Even though my sacred wolf had healed my wounds, I was aware that they could still see the scars on my body. The scars will remain in place as a reminder of my past.

"I'm not sure what happened to you, but if you want to exact vengeance on them, I can show you how. I can assist you."

I was an intruder who hadn't seen him since the hospital, but he promised to train me. He's willing to assist me.

"Why?" I asked, my voice weak and cracked, tears streaming down both sides of my eyes.

"You reminded me of my wife so much. She is in the same boat as you." Elder Lionel sighed deeply after saying that. "Allow me to assist you in starting over, Nikky. Nothing is too late for you," He kept going, holding both of my hands. I saw sincerity in him.

I accepted the offer, and we began training. He served as my father and continues to do so. Leonard and I became close during training, developing a relationship that felt like a real family. Despite the fact that I don't show my emotions to them or anyone else besides Serenity, they can read me very well.

They introduced me to Beatrice, who took over as my mother. I even celebrated my first birthday with them outside Nightcrawler Pack. This family is the best gift I've ever received. Until that day, I hadn't smiled in a long time, let alone a happy smile.

They took me in as their own.

Aside from my father and Beatrice, I was introduced to other seniors. Elder Paul and Elder Ruby are their names. Elder Ruby and I are diametrically opposed. She made it abundantly clear when she discovered I was the daughter of a beta who couldn't shift on the first day we met. She frequently used that to make fun of me.

When Elder Ruby approached me, I was practicing the new skills Lionel had shown me on the training grounds with a few warriors who were training independently. She is more attentive to me than Elder Paul. She enjoys making fun of the fact that I can't shift, oblivious to the beast watching her from within me.

Why isn't she just leaving me alone? I thought, irritably adding to my ideas. I choose to ignore her while trying to recall what Lionel was doing before leaving to get something.

"Why are you still alive if you can't shift at your current age? After all, who would want a frail, non-shifting she-wolf? I don't understand Lionel's desire for you."

I took a deep breath and straightened up to focus on the action. Serenity was yelling, screaming, and growling at the elder every second of my mind. In an attempt to calm her rage, I inhale and exhale.

"Nikky, did the Moon Goddess create such a monster that you had to flee to your home? You're such a useless creature!" She had gone too far. Serenity wanted to fight because it was too far. She's already choking on the tight grip of my hand.

"Nikky!" Beatrice and Leonard both mentioned my name. I didn't even hear them arrive because I was so enraged.

Despite my best efforts to loosen my grip on the elder, I ended up tightening it even more. Agony was written all over her pale face.

"You're going to kill her, Nikky!" Leonard yelled at me, yanking my arm away.

I didn't take my gaze away from the elderly man who was struggling to breathe. To be honest, I loved how terrified she seemed to be in my presence.

"Allow her to go. It's pointless to do so." Lionel stated. He is right.

Leonard and Beatrice turned to me when they noticed my hold on her neck had loosened. "Next time this happens, I promise it'll be worse," I threatened Ruby in a harsh, guttural voice. Then I abandoned her on the ground, stranded and lost.

My eyes turned red, indicating that Leonard was in charge in part. I turned to look at everyone before passing out and noticed the terror and confusion in their eyes.

On that day, Lionel and the pack learned about Serenity. My family respected my decision to keep her in the dark, even though they disagreed with it. My family and the warriors treated me normally, and they also helped me learn how to deal with Serenity easily.

**

"Are you taking notes?" Leonard screamed. I admitted that I had completely lost focus during our conversation.

"Are you okay?" He gave me a worried expression. I nodded to assuage his fears. He shot me a quick glance before taking a deep breath and moving on. "I'm sure you know I adore you, Nikky."

I'm not sure where the conversation will go, so I simply nod. I continued to listen without interrupting him "And you are the second-best thing that has happened to me since my mother's death. I just want you to know that whether you're my biological sister or not, Dad, Beatrice, and I all adore you. You are extremely important to us."

Since I told my father, Leonard, and Beatrice about my abuse, Leonard has assured me that he is not like Eris.

That is evident.

Leonard and I are like twins, despite being three years apart in age. Despite not being blood relatives, we have a close relationship similar to that of siblings. He keeps an eye on me while I'm in training and stays by my side when my dreams become too vivid.

Serenity also loves and accepts him.

"You will always be my big brother, blood related or not," I told him sincerely.

He looked at my eyes and was struck by how delicate they were. I treasure my adoptive family.

"What happened?" I stretched before sitting down and asking Leonard. I was aware that he was having difficulties.

He averted his gaze and seemed tense before fumbling with his fingers and murmuring, "here goes nothing," which I picked up on.

"A pack will be trained the following week." He gave me a suspicious look.

"OK," I said, puzzled as to why it took him so long to explain when it is our responsibility.

I could tell his face was becoming paler.

Why is he scared?

"We're training them," mumbled he.

"Who?" I inquired.

"The Moon Pack at Midnight."

I knew the day would come when I would have to see them again. I just hope this doesn't have a negative impact on me. After all, they're the ones responsible for my demons, scars, and gruesome past. However, we clearly cannot have it all in this life.

While waiting for Leonard to respond, I asked, "When?" while looking forward. His gaze was drawn to the side of my face, as if he was trying to figure out what I was thinking.

"I don't know, but the elders told me to let you know," he admitted truthfully. When I heard that, I got up from my bench and grabbed my boxing gloves before leaving the gym.

"You know I can train them in your place," Leonard said as he blocked my path and grabbed my shoulders.

"The pack must always come first," I said as I met his gaze.

"Of course I am aware of that, Nikky. But I'm sure you realize I'm just concerned about you. I mean, you'll have to confront them, your past... and I'm not—"

"It is my responsibility," I interrupted Leonard before he could finish his sentence.

Even after I pushed his hands away from my shoulders and sidestepped him, he persisted. He obstructed my path once more.

I frowned and looked at him, thinking irritably that this was starting to irritate me. "Leonard, let me go," I said with a deadly glare.

He turned to face me and remained motionless, still trying to persuade me that I didn't have to face my previous pack. "I won't be held accountable for my actions," I growled lowly at him. That was, indeed, a warning.

Leonard is well aware that I have the worst temper when it comes to pack training. He is aware that when I accepted this responsibility, I promised to help any werewolf pack in need for any reason. I am a pack trainer and fighter, as well as one of the best in the supernatural realm and werewolf society.

My past will not hold me back.

When he realized I wasn't joking, he looked defeated. "Are you going to be okay?" He asked a serious question.

"Without a doubt. I'm perfectly fine. Even if I had to confront my former family, nothing would change. Leonard, you and Beatrice and Dad are now part of my family. They are no longer my relatives since the day they punished me with their own hands. I don't consider them to be one." He appeared to be almost satisfied with my response. "What about him?" he inquired.

Him. As I stared at Leonard, I was thinking incoherently.

When he noticed my puzzled expression, he clarified, "Samson, you're supposed to be mate."

Samson, of course.

In my head, I laughed. How did I manage to forget about my true pal? That jerk has long since faded from my memory. He was now nothing to me. No one can hold it against me if I stop experiencing the mate link. I'm not sure if it still exists, but I'm not getting any feelings or energy from Samson.

I used to feel something after his rejection, but not anymore. Nothing.

"And what about him? That guy can't do anything. Remember how he preferred my sister to me? Why would I allow him to have any effect on me? To be honest, I'm sick of him." I responded.

"But will you be okay if you see him and your sister?" Leonard then asks me another question.

I looked him in the eyes and said, "Would you be okay if I broke your bone? I've already told you, Leonard, that I'm sick of him."

Nothing beats them seeing me as someone strong and independent, unlike the girl they used to abuse and punish.

When I replied, Leonard gave me a satisfied look. He then gave me assurance and comfort "If anything happens, please contact me. Please notify me, and I will be there." I smiled at his thoughtfulness.

He assisted me in defeating my demons. Aside from Serenity, I drew a lot of my strength from them as well. My household. They gave me a house—or, more accurately, a home. Nothing, not my background, not my original family, will ever be able to replace them.

In the mirror, I see full black hair with a few white strands, vibrant violet eyes, and pale skin with light scarring. My past and present have scarred every inch of my body. But Beatrice made sure I ate three times a day for the first two years of my Mountain Black Pack residency. She was right when she said I was bony. They truly starved me, but the Knights saved my life. And now I have a fit and lean physique.

Regardless, I have to tell myself that my real family brought me to my current family—the family I always wanted to have—whether they were blood relatives or not.

Even now, when I'm alone and silent in the Mountain Black Pack, words from that night reverberate in my head. The fact that some things happen for a reason—good or bad—does not excuse their behavior, and I will teach them how to mistreat and torture others solely by using themselves. Despite my previous promise not to exact vengeance, I still intend to teach them a lesson. Some lessons that might make them realize how much harm they have caused me.

After all, confronting my past is not as terrifying as confronting those lethal rogues, which I have done numerous times. Those mindless beings encourage me to slaughter whatever comes my way.

Before walking away, I took a few more looks in the mirror. Then I put on a black leather jacket. I left my room to go to the courtroom of the elders, where all the alphas meet the elders. Even though I could always meet with Leonard and force him to take over training my previous pack, doing so would expose my weakness.

I despise frailty. I vowed to Serenity that I would never be frail. I put in a lot of effort to get this job, so I'm not going to give it up because of them.

Before opening the massive golden doors for me, the guards on the sides bowed their heads in awe. I took a deep breath before entering the room for another session.

I said, 'Serenity,' using mindlink.

'Yes?' My wolf quickly responded.

'What do you think is causing all of this to happen? My life has been fine and peaceful without them. So, why did fate take this unexpected turn?' I let go. I feel so at ease asking my wolf questions that have been bothering me.

'I'm not sure either, Nikky. But one thing is certain: you must continue. Continue until you figure out why this is happening.'

Serenity is correct. I need to figure out why Moon Goddess is leading me back to my past.