Rael's Pov

I opened my eyes and knew right away something was really wrong. This wasn't my room.

The ceiling was plain white and I didn't recognize it at all. The bed under me felt stiff and uncomfortable like no one had slept there for a long time. I sat up slowly and my whole body hurt, my muscles ached and my joints felt like they were grinding together. There was a dull pain behind my eyes that just wouldn't go away.

I looked around the small room but didn't recognize anything. The walls were empty except for one small painting of a forest. The furniture was simple and old. There was a dresser in the corner and just one chair by the window. That was it, i had no personal stuff, no warmth. Just a guest room or something for visitors.

Where was my stuff?

I got up on shaky legs and went to the dresser. I opened all the drawers, it was empty, there was nothing. Then I checked the small closet next to the door. There was just a plain dress and some basic shoes on the floor, none of it was mine.

My throat got tight and panic started to build in my chest. Where was everything? Where were my clothes and my jewelry? What about the little box of letters my mom wrote me before she died? Where was the blue shawl Corvin gave me on our bonding day?

The door opened and I spun around.

A middle-aged woman with kind eyes and gray hair walked in holding a tray with water and bread. She wore simple pack healer clothes, when she saw I was awake she smiled softly.

"Luna Rael," she said, then quickly fixed herself. "I mean Rael. You're awake, that's good. You need to eat something."

"Where are my things?" I asked. My voice was rough and cracked because I hadn't used it in a while.

Her smile got smaller and she put the tray down on the small table by the bed. "I don't know about your stuff. I was only told to check on your health."

"Who are you?"

"I'm Doctor Lydia . I've been the pack doctor for fifteen years."

I didn't know her name, but I wasn't surprised. A lot had changed in five years.

"Sit down please," she said, pointing to the bed. "I need to check you."

I didn't want to, but my legs shook so much I had no choice. I sat down hard, and she came closer with her healer bag.

"May I?" she asked, motioning to my arms.

I nodded. She rolled up the sleeves of my thin nightgown. Her eyes got big when she saw my wrists, i knew what she was looking at. The scars were thick and ugly, wrapped around my wrists like silver bracelets that would never come off. The scars from chains that had dug into my skin every day for so long.

"These are old," she said quietly. Her voice sounded kind of scared. "Silver burns?"

"Yes."

She touched them lightly and I jumped even though it didn't hurt anymore. The pain was long gone but the memories were still fresh and sharp.

"There are more," I said. "All over me."

She looked at me with pity in her eyes. I hated that. I didn't want anyone's pity.

"May I see?"

I stood up and pulled the nightgown off without caring if I was modest anymore. What did it even matter now? She was a healer, she had seen everything before. I stood there naked and let her look.

I heard her sharp breath.

The scars covered me like a map of pain. Long thin lines from whips across my back. Round burn marks on my sides and stomach from hot metal. Deep cuts on my ankles just like the ones on my wrists and other marks too. Marks I didn't want to think about.

"Goddess above," Doctor Lydia whispered. She put her hand to her mouth. "What did they do to you?"

"Does it matter?" I said.

"Rael, I need to know what happened so I can help you better."

"You can't help me," I said and put my nightgown back on. "No one can."

"Please. Just tell me something. Were you kept captive? Were you hurt?"

I sat down again and stared at the wall. "Yes."

"For how long?"

"Five years."

She was quiet for a long time and then sat down next to me on the bed. "You are very weak. You don't have enough food in you and your body is hurt from everything. You need rest, good food, and time to get better."

"I'm fine."

"You're not," she said strongly. "You collapsed yesterday in front of the whole pack. You were out for a whole day and night. Your body is shutting down because it has been through so much."

I didn't say anything.

"Will you tell me who did this?"

"No."

"Where have you been?"

"No."

"Will you tell me anything at all?"

"No."

Doctor Lydia sighed and stood up. "Okay. I can't make you talk. But I'm here if you need me. I'll check on you again tomorrow."

She walked to the door, then stopped and looked back at me. "Your husband has been sitting outside your room since you woke. He only left for important pack things. He's very worried."

My jaw tightened and anger boiled in my throat. "Tell him to go away."

"Rael, he cares about you."

"Tell him to go away," I said again, my voice cold and hard. "I don't want to see him."

She looked like she wanted to say more but just nodded and left.

I sat on that uncomfortable bed, in that strange room, feeling so heavy. Five years. Five years of pain and darkness and torture. Five years of calling for my mate and he never came. Five years of losing everything.

Now I was back and everything was different. No room of my own.

Corvin's Pov

I leaned against the wall outside the guest room and closed my eyes, trying to breathe normally, but my chest felt tight like someone was squeezing my lungs.

She was in there. Rael was in there, alive, breathing and real.

For five years, I thought she was dead, and now she was just behind this door, but I couldn't go in because she didn't want to see me. The doctor made that very clear a few minutes ago.

"She needs rest, Alpha," Doctor Lydia said softly. Her eyes looked like she was blaming me a little. "And she doesn't want visitors right now."

"I'm her husband," I said.

"She was very clear. She doesn't want to see you."

Those words hit me like a punch. I watched the doctor walk away, but I stayed right here because I couldn't make myself leave. I had to be close to her even if she didn't want me there.

My Beta, Marcus, came by two times to pull me away for pack stuff. Both times I went, but only because I had to. Then I came straight back here, right outside her door. I couldn't stay away now that I had her back.

I ran my hands through my hair and felt super tired. I hadn't slept at all since she collapsed yesterday. How could I sleep when she was hurt and pushing me away?

I let my head fall back against the wall, closed my eyes, and the memories came like a flood, just like always. That night, the worst night of my life.

I was at the Silver Fang Pack for a meeting that I didn't want to go to, but the messengers said it was urgent. Rael kissed my forehead and told me to go and take care of it. She said she'd be fine for one night, just one night.

I felt restless the whole meeting and couldn't focus. Alpha Garrett of Silver Fang noticed and asked if I was okay. I said yes even though something in my gut told me to go home but I didn't listen. I stayed and finished, then started heading back. That's when I felt it.

A sharp, terrible pain shooting through the mate bond like lightning. Rael was hurting, she was in danger.

I shifted right away and ran faster than ever. My warriors followed, but I was ahead of them all. All I thought about was getting to her, keeping her safe, and making sure she was okay. The bond pulled me home and I burst through the pack house doors, ran up the stairs to our chambers, and threw open the door.

Blood.

So much blood.

The bed was soaked. The white sheets were red. There were claw marks on the walls, the furniture was knocked over. The window was open, the curtains blew in the night breeze. I stood frozen, staring at the mess, feeling my wolf howl with pain inside me, so deep it felt like it would tear me apart.

"Rael!" I shouted, but my voice broke when I said her name. "RAEL!"

No answer.

I looked everywhere,under the bed, in the closet, every corner but she wasn't there. She was gone, only blood was left behind.

My warriors came then and searched the whole pack house, the grounds, and the forest, but found nothing. No trail, no scent, no clue. It was like she vanished into thin air.

I stood in that bloody room feeling the mate bond get weaker and weaker until it was almost gone. Not completely broken but so faint I could barely feel it anymore. Like she was slipping away, like I was losing her.

I threw my head back and howled. The sound echoed across the mountains. Every wolf in my pack heard their Alpha's grief and knew something bad had happened.

The next days blurred together. I sent search parties everywhere and offered rewards for information. I contacted every pack within five hundred miles and begged them to look. I hardly ate or slept and spent every moment searching, but found nothing.

Her parents came. Her mom collapsed when she saw the blood. Her dad looked like he'd aged ten years instantly. They looked at me with desperate hope in their eyes and asked if I'd found her. I had to say no. We'd find her soon.

But we didn't find her soon.

Weeks turned to months and months turned to a year and still no sign. The bond grew fainter until I couldn't feel it at all. Everyone said she was dead and I should accept it and move on but I didn't. I kept searching and i kept hoping.

But hope hurts when there's no proof and no leads and no reason to think she's alive.

Two years after she disappeared, I finally accepted what everyone else already knew. Rael was dead, my mate was gone. That blood in our room was hers. She had bled out somewhere, all alone and scared, and I wasn't there to protect her.

The guilt nearly destroyed me.

And now she's back.

Alive and here. Everything I built with Nyra suddenly feels like a huge mistake. I don't know how to fix it.

The door opened suddenly and Doctor Lydia walked out, carrying the empty tray. She looked at me with those judging eyes and shook her head.

"She didn't eat," the doctor said. "She needs to eat, Alpha. She's dangerously malnourished."

"Let me talk to her," I said. "Please. I can convince her."

"She doesn't want to see you."

"I don't care. She's still my mate, i have the right to see her."

Doctor Lydia looked at me for a long moment, then sighed. "Fine but if she tells you to leave, you leave. Got it?"

I nodded fast and moved toward the door, but the doctor grabbed my arm.

"Whatever happened to her out there," she said quietly, "it was really bad, Alpha. Be gentle with her."

Rael's POV

I heard the door open but didn't turn around. I kept staring at the wall, hoping whoever it was would just go away and leave me alone.

"Rael."

Corvin's voice. Of course, it was him.

"Get out," I said quietly.

"Please. I just want to talk." he said.

"I said get out."

I heard him step closer and my body tensed like it was ready to fight. I hated that he still made me feel this way. After everything, after five years of being left behind. He could still make me react.

"The doctor said you didn't eat. You need to eat something."

"I'm fine."

"You are not fine. You collapsed yesterday, you were unconscious for more than a day. Please, just let me help you."

I finally turned around and immediately wished I hadn't. He looked tired and worried with dark circles under his eyes. His hair was messy like he'd been running his hands through it a lot. Part of me wanted to feel sorry for him, but a bigger part wanted to yell at him and ask where his concern had been five years ago when I was being hurt.

"You can't help me," I said, my voice flat and cold. "Nobody can, just leave."

"Rael, please."

"Leave, Corvin. Go back to your wife. Go back to Nyra."

His face twisted with pain when I said her name. I wanted him to hurt, j wanted him to feel even a little bit of what I'd felt.

He opened his mouth to say something but I turned away again. After a long moment, I heard him sigh and then footsteps as he walked out and softly closed the door behind him.

I was alone again.

I sat on the bed, wrapping my arms around myself, trying to calm down, but my heart was racing and my hands were shaking like I'd break. I needed to find something solid to hold onto before I fell apart.

Lyric. My wolf.

I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and reached inside, searching for that warm place in my chest where she always lived, the place where I could feel her and hear her voice and get strength from her when I needed it.

"Lyric," I whispered. "Please. I need you."

Nothing.

I tried harder, pushing past the walls I built to keep myself safe, and called her name over and over in my mind.

"Lyric, Lyric, please. Please come back. I need you."

Still nothing, just emptiness. A huge dark space where she used to be.

My chest felt hollow, like someone had scooped out everything important and left only a broken shell that looked like me but wasn't really me anymore, because the most important part was gone.

I remembered what it was like to have her with me, the constant company, never being truly alone because she was always there, ready to lend her strength when mine ran out. I remembered her voice telling me I was strong and brave and could do anything. I remembered how good it felt to shift and run through the forest with her in control.

All of that was gone now.

They took it from me. The monsters in that cell tortured me until Lyric couldn't take it and hid so deep inside that I couldn't reach her. And now I didn't even know if she was still there at all or if she was really gone forever.

The thought made my throat close up and my eyes burn with tears.

I had lost so much already. My freedom, my dignity, my safety. My trust in anyone or anything and I lost something else too. Something I could barely even think about because the pain was too much.

My hand moved to my stomach without me thinking and pressed on the flat, empty space.

My baby.

I'd been pregnant that night, I found out that morning and was so happy, so excited to tell Corvin. I planned a whole surprise for when he got back from his meeting. I was going to make his favorite meal, light candles, and tell him. I wanted to see his face light up with joy.

But he never came back in time.

Instead, I was attacked and dragged away and thrown into that cell. The pain started fast and sharp. Then the blood, so much blood. The feeling of something inside me dying and slipping away, and I couldn't stop it no matter how hard I tried.

I screamed for help but no one came. No one cared. They just laughed through the bars and said I deserved it and should stay quiet.

I lost my baby alone in that cell, in pain, and no one even tried to help me.

The tears came then, and I couldn't stop them. They poured down my face while my shoulders shook. I pressed my hand harder against my stomach like I could feel the baby that had been there, though I knew it was impossible.

"I'm sorry," I whispered to the baby who never got to be born. "I'm so sorry I couldn't protect you. I'm so sorry."

I curled up on the bed, pulled my knees tight to my chest, and sobbed like I was breaking open with all the pain inside me, the grief, the rage, the loss. It all poured out uncontrollably.

Lyric should have been here. She should've helped me through this. We should have shared this pain like we always did, but she was gone. I was alone and didn't know how to survive this by myself.

"Please come back," I begged out loud, even though I knew she couldn't hear me. "Please, Lyric. I can't do this without you. I can't survive it alone. Please."

But there was no answer. Just the same awful silence that had been with me for years.

I cried until I had no more tears and then I just lay there empty, tired and broken. The room got darker as the sun went down.