3: 3
I went to the ER to get my forehead bandaged, and while I was there I booked the abortion for the next afternoon.
On my way out, I saw them at the far end of the hallway. Kieran had his arms wrapped tight around my sister.
“Polly! You have to keep living!”
“You still have your parents, you still have your sister, and you still have me……”
Off to the side, Mom was crying, her eyes swollen and red.
“Polly, baby, I'm begging you. Live.”
“Whatever you want, Mom will give it to you!”
I couldn't help thinking that if my sister said she wanted Kieran, Mom would tell me to step aside without a second's hesitation.
“Hello, sister. What a coincidence.”
My voice came out flat.
Kieran saw the fresh bandage on my forehead, and a flicker of guilt crossed his face.
“Katie, I'm sorry. I was just in such a panic today.”
My mother's face darkened at once.
“Kieran, what are you apologizing for!”
“If you hadn't gotten there in time, Polly might have……”
My sister took my hand gently, tears in her eyes as she apologized.
“I'm sorry, little sister.”
“I didn't want any of this. After I lost my husband and my son, I got depression. I can't control myself!”
I nodded.
“I understand, Polly. I understand everything.”
Seeing that I wasn't making a scene, Kieran finally let out a slow breath.
“Katie, I took your sister in for a psychological evaluation.”
“Thank God, it's not the most severe kind of depression.”
Mom grumbled.
“All right, all right, let's hurry up and go.”
“I hate that antiseptic smell in hospitals!”
The three of them walked off side by side. No one cared that I was still standing there.
A few young nurses passed by, gossiping as they watched them go.
“Yeah, yeah, that's the one, the handsome guy, so devoted to his wife!”
“Carried his wife the whole way in. That's serious boyfriend material!”
Another young nurse shushed them.
“That woman's faking it. She doesn't have depression at all.”
“Doesn't matter, though, does it? Her husband and her own mother dote on her.”
Their words drifted past my ears like a gust of wind.
I touched the gauze on my forehead. So my sister had been faking it all along.
A message popped up on my phone. It was Kieran.
【Rehearsal's in two hours, don't forget.】
【My girl, I'm going to give you a grand wedding.】
I didn't reply. The rehearsal. Whether I went or not, what difference did it make?
I listed the marital home on a resale site.
If there wasn't going to be a wedding, what was the point of keeping it.
I suddenly decided I didn't want to go see the snow after all.
I'd go south instead, where it was spring all year round, where the sun was bright.
I booked a flight. The departure date was the day of the wedding.
The name on the invitation wasn't mine. This wedding was never going to be mine.
Two hours later, Kieran blew up my phone.
【Katie, why aren't you here yet?】
【We're all waiting for you! Come quick!!】
Then came my mother's message.
【How can you be so inconsiderate?! Making trouble for everyone!】
【Your sister's so upset she's crying, asking me if you're still angry!】
【It's such a small thing, they just printed the wrong name on the invitation! Kieran's already handling it!】
I gripped the coffee cup in my hand, letting the warmth sink straight into my palm.
This winter, my own family was colder to me than this cup of coffee.
In the group chat named “Happy Family”, I typed back two words.
【On my way.】
No one answered.
By the time I made my unhurried way to the doors of the rehearsal hall, I caught the officiant's voice at just the right moment.
“Miss Polly Pruitt, do you take Mr. Kieran Stephens to be your husband?”
4: 4
I stood outside the door and saw my sister in the wedding dress she'd picked out for me, holding the bouquet she'd designed herself.
"I do."
Her voice was shy, and underneath it ran a stolen kind of pleasure.
The officiant went on.
"Kieran Stephens, do you take Polly Pruitt to be your wife?"
Kieran's eyes were steady.
"I do."
They exchanged rings, and it looked like the next second they'd kiss.
I let out a soft laugh.
"So it makes no difference whether I come or not."
My sister's hand jerked, and the bouquet fell to the floor.
The dress that was supposed to have gone on me fit her perfectly.
There wasn't even a flicker of panic or guilt on Kieran's face at being caught.
He explained without any shame.
"Katie, you never showed up, so I had your sister rehearse in your place."
"Your sister's had a hard life. She never got a wedding of her own back then."
"This time it happens to make one of her wishes come true."
My sister came over holding up her skirt, sobbing as she explained.
"Katie, I didn't mean anything by it. I just wanted to know what it feels like, to be a bride, to be loved."
"Even if it's fake."
Two lines of tears ran down from the corners of her perfect eyes.
Mom immediately stepped in front of her.
"It's only a rehearsal anyway. You're the one who showed up late!"
"It isn't even real, so what are you making a fuss about?"
Kieran quickly pulled my sister behind him.
"Katie, whatever's got you angry, take it out on me."
"Don't give your sister a hard time. She only wanted to make up for what she missed."
The staff whispered among themselves.
"So she's the real bride."
I laughed, bitter.
"Why are you all in such a rush?"
"Did I say anything?"
"Go on with the rehearsal. I want to make up for my sister's regret too."
My sister gripped my hand, tears shining in her eyes.
"Katie, I knew it. You love me the most."
The music started again, and the dance went on.
I, the bride-to-be, turned and left, and no one cared.
That night I cleared out Kieran's things in my rented apartment.
Everything about how we first met, about the days we couldn't get enough of each other, about our future, all of it went into the trash.
My sister had a new post up.
It was a wedding photo of her and Kieran, though only from behind.
The caption read:
【At last I'm your bride, even if it's all just an illusion.】
I curled my lip. The post was set to be visible only to me.
Sister, if you want to steal it, fine, I'll hand it over.
That night Kieran knocked on my door, his face full of apology.
"Katie! Don't get rid of the baby! Keep it!"
I didn't understand.
"Why? Didn't you say the baby would break my sister's heart?"
Kieran locked me in his arms.
"Katie, your sister told me she hemorrhaged after giving birth. It'll be hard for her to have another child."
"The baby you're carrying now, once it's born, register it under her name."
I bit the inside of my cheek and forced myself not to get angry.
"So my sister changed her mind, and now she wants my baby?"
Kieran nodded.
"She's your sister. You can't bear the thought of her growing old with no one, can you?"
I understood now.
So even whether I kept the baby in my belly had to follow my sister's wishes.
Afraid she'd be hurt, I had to get rid of it.
Afraid she'd grow old with no one, I had to give birth to it and put it under her name.
"All right."
"Katie, you're so good to me. We'll have more children later."
The smell of my sister's shampoo on Kieran was stronger than ever.
I closed my eyes, and the tears slid down.
There would be no later.
Kieran, I will never bear a child with your blood in it.
"The day after tomorrow the cars come to bring the bride. They'll drive straight to the new house for you."
"Six in the morning."
"Fine. Got it."
The next afternoon I went to the hospital alone.
Cold instruments worked inside my body.
And with that, the last thread tying me to Kieran was cut clean through.
The agent sent a message:
"Miss Pruitt, the buyer's seen the house and is very happy with it."
"We can close today!"
When I left the hospital, I went straight to the transaction center and sold the house.
Once everything was handled, that night I boarded the last flight and left for Denver.
……
The wedding cars pulled into the complex right on time.
Kieran, in his groom's suit, holding flowers, knocked on the door while the crowd cheered him on.
"Katie, I'm here for the bride. Open up."
The door opened. A couple stood there, wary, on guard.
"It's the crack of dawn. What are you all doing at my door?"
