On the day of the miscarriage surgery review, Dawson used the excuse of work to not accompany me.

However, when I came out of the hospital with the lifelong infertility test report, I unexpectedly ran into Dawson.

He held his Number One Omega, his’s childhood sweetheart, Ruby Maxwayne.

I turned my head forward, no longer paying attention at Dawson and Ruby’s arrival.

Soon as I closed down the front door, I opened Tattle out of whim. There, I saw RedMaxine’s, Ruby’s account, post: [Got my knight in shining armor! He was a simple and cold man but he dragged me all the way to the hospital! This guy is so sweet, people will misunderstand!]

Since I was a mutual with her on several social media, I saw her account uploading a photo with the same exact captions. In the photo, there captured a shoulder part with navy blue jersey with light gray circle around its short sleeve’s end. And that shirt was the one Dawson wore earlier. It was a gift for his last 24th birthday.

Many people sent me messages, wanting to see me fight back and defeat them.

I smiled and said, "No need, congratulations to the scumbag and the bitch, they are a perfect match!"

It's time for me to give up this loveless marriage.

--

I lost my first child, because someone collided with me on my way home from work.

Someone wearing a thief mask was dashing towards me with a really high speed. I remembered seeing his arm already transformed into that of a wolf. He pushed me aside with force.

The next thing I could remember was the excruciating pain and I woke up out on a hospital bed while Doctor Pearson was talking to a nurse next to my bed.

My husband, Dawson, only came the next day in the evening.

Even then he was busy smiling at his smartphone for Goddess knows how long.

On the day, Dawson abruptly stood up from his chair, his eyes glued to the smartphone in his hand.

“Something came up. I have to go.”

Doctor Pearson blinked at him incredulously, “Are you sure, Mr. White? Mrs. White’s examination--”

But by then, Dawson had walk through the ward door, the door eventually clicked shut behind him.

“--is almost finished.” Doctor Pearson trailed off. She exchanged glances with me afterward.

But before she could say anything, I said with a smile, “It’s alright, doctor. My husband is busy like that.”

Today was my second physical examination since I lost my child.

Dawson used the excuse of work to not accompany me. He said he would pick me up after I finished the doctor's examination.

I was so glad Doctor Pearson didn’t press on the topic that day.

She wasn’t even showing weird gestures or giving me judgmental look when I came alone for another check up today.

[Customer number 1 0 2 please go to the pharmacy counter.] The loud speaker rang calling my number. I gathered my purse and jacket before going to take my medicine.

As the nurse wrapped up her concise rundown of the medicine, my mind wandered briefly to the next task at hand. With a quick nod of gratitude, I reached into my pocket and pulled out my phone.

Yet, when I turned on the screen, I saw a notification from Dawson. [Saddie, you can go home on your own, can't you? Something came up and I really need to take care of it.]

Oh… Well, it seemed I had to go home on my own again today.

[Sure.] I shrugged and put my phone bag into my jacket.

Was I disappointed?

Yeah, probably, I guess.

In the past, I would have been sad and would beg him to pick me up. ‘Dawson, could you please make time? I need you to be here.’ I’d probably send him such replies.

It had always been like this for the longest time I was ever married to him. Ah, to be very honest I had forgot the exact details. Around six months or so, after Dawson and I got married, he’d start to have sudden departures—never telling me the exact reason why he did so.

He’d always get mad when I asked. Always grown frustrated and went straight to bed the moment he came home. Always walking towards the small fountain at our front yard when talking phones from clients—he said.

At first, it hurt, a sharp sting of abandonment. But over time, I guessed… the pain was even more bearable. I wish I had grown numb to it. Unfortunately, but reality wasn’t always cooperative.

The sky had turned darker the moment I stepped out of the hospital door. I rubbed my hands together as the autumn chill had blown and the heater of the hospital lobby didn’t reach past the automatic door.

I scanned the perimeter and saw a bunch of blue sedans parking side by side at the corner, in the special parking lot for cabs. I raised my hand and waved, hailing for one. Soon, a blue sedan stopped before me and I opened the door and settled into the backseat.

“Glorywayne Estate Complex on Nightingale Street, please,” I told the cab driver.

The driver nodded and started operating the small device on his dashboard.

The moment I clicked on my seatbelt, I looked outside the window. A familiar sight caught my eyes. It was Dawson's silver Audee parking just in front of my cab.

I blinked, shifting on my seat to check out the license plate. And indeed, it was his car.

Why was he here? Didn’t he text me that he could not pick me up?

But the nature soon gave me reply in the most cheeky way.

As the cab started to drive away, I saw Dawson get outside and towards the front passenger seat, opening its door. The next moment, a woman got out of his car.

That person was his Number One Omega, Dawson’s childhood sweetheart, Ruby Maxwayne.

A faint blew in my heart caused me to shift on my seat. I turned my head forward, no longer paying attention at Dawson and Ruby’s arrival.

I didn’t realize it back then, but now that I remembered I was around on my first month of pregnancy when Ruby returned to Silverfang Pack - Central.

It was also the start of Dawson’s sudden disappearances streak.

There wasn’t a single thought of suspicion in me when Dawson and I were picking up Ruby from Silverfang International Airport. I was quite naive to believe that Dawson was simply picking up a good omega friend of him after her very unfortunate divorce with her husband.

During the ride to the airport, Dawson had told me that the great pandemic had affected Ruby’s husband business and couldn’t survive bankruptcy. It then led them to a divorce.

As a beta, I wasn’t really aware of the detailed dynamics between an alpha and an omega. What I did know, from learning the school textbooks years back, was the mention that an omega could be in a very vulnerable situation if she wasn’t under a scent protection of a more influential alpha.

Since Dawson’s business had led him to met influential people in the council of Silverfang, he, as an alpha, could legally provide a powerful scent protection to omega in need.

That day, what surprised me was more on the fact that Ruby had returned with a son in her arm. That son somehow looked like Dawson, but I didn’t give much thought about it back then.

“That’d be seventeen dollars, ma’am,” the cab driver announced upon arriving at destination.

I took out my phone and scanned the payment code before getting out of the cab.

Soon as I closed down the front door, I opened software out of whim. There, I saw RedMaxine’s, Ruby’s account, post: [Got my knight in shining armor! It was a simple cold but he dragged me all the way to the hospital! This guy is so sweet, people will misunderstood!]

Since I was a mutual with her on several social media, I saw her account uploading a photo with the same exact captions. In the photo, there captured a shoulder part with navy blue jersey with light gray circle around its short sleeve’s end. And that shirt was the one Dawson wore earlier. It was the gift I gave him on his 24th birthday.

I closed my social media app and proceed going upstairs to our room.

I didn’t even want to confront Dawson. Why he lied today, and the many days before today. I couldn’t even get angry and instead began blaming myself.

I should’ve left him. Why should he stay when he clearly insisted on being with someone else? I shouldn’t have resisted nature, Dawson was an alpha, of course he’d be more attracted to omegas.

It was clear that Dawson merely saw me as a substitute for Ruby after she left him years ago. He never really told me about Ruby until the few days she finally arrived at the international airport.

Yet, I was deeply in love with him. I had chosen to marry him and had hoped that maybe, our relationship was one of the rare chances where alpha-ness or beta-ness wouldn’t really matter.

That the two of us could have a happy marriage.

That I, would be happy with him.

For Goddess’s sake, I even wanted to give birth to his child!

However, my loss of our first child was most likely a sign that I had to wake up. Perhaps, even with a presence of a born baby between us, Dawson wouldn’t even bother to change.

My mind was busy as it kept on recalling things, of which order I couldn’t even recall.

The last thing I remember before slipping into sleep, was the day I met Dawson, Ruby, and her son Darby outside a cafe on a fine weekend.

They really looked like those pictures of a happy new family that people often posted on social media.

I remembered something had actually snapped within me that day and said out loud to Dawson, “You should’ve seen him often.” By that, I was referring to Darby. “Growing up, he might need a father figure.”

Both Dawson and Ruby were surprised back then. What I didn’t anticipate, however, was the fact Dawson took a step forward and slapped me across my face.

“How could you say that, Saddie?” his face was flushed. “You had no idea how Darby even feel for not being able to see his father,” he said in a low tone. He didn’t shout.

Soon after, Dawson took Ruby and Darby away from the cafe.

There was a creak and a sinking of the bed behind my back. It prompted me to open my eyes.

"Did the doctor say anything about your condition?" Dawson was behind me.

The proximity brought me a waft of a scent, that wasn’t quite like him, and a faint perfume of freshness that was recently popular among females. Being a beta might limit me from having keener senses of smell unlike alphas or omegas. But I could connect the dots, I could guess whose scent that was.

I shrugged and lightly pushed his hand away.

"Doctor Pearson said I’m okay," I said, masking a neutral tone in my sleepy voice.

Perhaps surprised at my rejection, Dawson offered a hurried explanation, "A new project came out this evening and I need to personally take care of it."

Yeah, a project to escort Ruby to the hospital.

I kept that to myself, "Yeah…” I said. “Don’t forget to shower."

I stopped paying attention once I heard the sound of water drops hitting the tile.

The next day, I was in a work meeting.

My phone vibrates a few times inside my uniform’s pocket.

“Seems urgent.” Pamela, my coworker whispered to me.

We were in the meeting of morning briefing. Pamela and I was standing a bit farther from the center crowd.

“It can wait. Look--” I gestured towards the whiteboard with a quick nod. “--we're already on the Teletummies' Laughing Sun slide.” Beneath the laughing sun, the bolded text read [Questions?].

True enough, Alex, our supervisor, dismissed us from the meeting.

Today I had been assigned on a pre-dawn shift. I woke up around three, doing my usual preparation rituals and directly call a cab to the hospital.

When I got to a quieter hospital hall, I checked on my phone to find 20 missed calls from Dawson.

He beat me up to it before I could press the call button though.

The contact ID [Hubby<3] shown up at the front of my TalkApp. I slightly scrunched up my face. Did I really put Dawson’s contact with that name?

“Hello?”

"Saddie, why didn't you wake me up? I overslept! There’s an important meeting with the client today and I need to prepare early, you know?” Dawson’s voice was dripped with palpable annoyance. "You just up and left and didn’t tell me you had a morning shift?" he continued to process.

But in fact, I had told Dawson about my schedule. I sent him a file of my schedule earlier this week.

“Well? You didn’t tell me you had to wake up early.” I replied, casually. No tone of sarcasm there. I wasn’t even in the mood to argue this early.

I could understand his frustration though. I used to take care of Dawson’s every need. Over-serving him, even—especially after we finally got married. I would prepare his clothes, his breakfast, checking on his schedules so that I could remind him when we finally had that breakfast together, and so on.

I was secretly thanking the Moon Goddess for never vowing to do those routines for the rest of our marriage life. At least, it gave my mind the freedom to just stop doing those stuff when I no longer feel like it.

I was not his babysitter. I had the right to refuse.

"Dawson, I think it’s better for you to get up since you’re going to be late."

Dawson harrumphed from the other end. "You didn’t prepare my shirt! What am I going to wear today?"

"Whichever you want to wear. You can take one from the closet," I replied.

"What do you mean take one from the closet?!" Dawson raised his tone.

I instinctively put my phone away from my ears. I frowned because my right ear was ringing.

“Saddie! Norton’s mom brought us some donuts, which one do you want?” Pamella called around the end of the hall.

“Wait!” I replied Pamella. Then I hurriedly said to the phone again, "Something came up. My colleague asked for my help. Just pick one clothes from the closet. I need to go, Dawson."

I approached Pamella and went to the staffroom before continuing my shift.

However, my phone kept on vibrating.

Dawson sent me a picture with texts: [It’s wrinkled! Are you serious, Saddie? I can't wear this to meet up my client.]

Then another texts: [There’s no food. You didn’t cook up breakfast?]

Then another: [Did you see the blue folder I usually put on my study desk?]

[Saddie, answer me!]

I kind of regretted opening my TalkApp.

“Saddie, got a moment?”

I looked up from my desk and turned just at the office’s entrance. I saw Alex, my head department, poking out his head. He approached me once I nodded.

"You need to listen to me and take this opportunity, Saddie. It’s not going to be there forever," Alex said with patience, but the excitement in his eyes and his ear-to-ear smile betrayed that calm facade.

I let out a small laugh. “What is it, Alex?”

He cleared his throat, "Well, after assessing your performance, it looks like the hospital wants to discuss your further training. I decided to tell you this because you seem to have fully recovered now, too!"

True, Alex had given me the same news around the end of last year. At that time, I declined the offer since I planned on having children with Dawson. I would have a busy schedule if I went through with the training and be granted a likely promotion.

I didn’t want to skip too much time for my child and my husband back then.

But now that things had gone through this way….

I didn’t plan to stay longer with Dawson and get myself wasted in more pain.

"I'll take the training offer, sir," I replied with a determined smile. “Thank you for giving me a second chance."

"Bravo!" Alex clapped his hands. It was his sign of ‘yes!’ He then asked me to make preparations from now and be ready whenever the training date was set.

Seeing his enthusiasm, I couldn’t help but smile.

I would definitely make up the most of this opportunity. This would be my start over to live independently from Dawson.

Morning turned into noon, then to dusk. My shift ended in a flash. I couldn’t believe how fast the time passed when noticing the sky outside had turned dark.

Just then, my phone vibrated. Dawson was calling.

"Where are you, Saddie? There’s no dinner at home."

At that I let out an involuntary sigh that I had long kept inside. The moment I heard his complaints, the thought of going home becomes something… revolting to me.

“Saddie?” His tone surprisingly got softer.

I pinched the bridge on my nose. “Dawson…” I make a brief pause. “Today was a hectic day. And Nate just asked me to have a shift switch with me, because she had something urgent coming up—”

Well, the last one, I didn’t lie.

“—Maybe order some food online. I’m going to continue working after this.”

"Huh?" Dawson sounded surprised.

"That’s not a problem, right?" I asked rhetorically, I just wanted to get over with the call.

"No…. No, it’s not a problem. I just…” Dawson hesitated before continuing, “Careful when going home, alright? You’re taking two shifts without break."

I nodded. "I will. Thanks"

Dawson was silent for a while.

I was about to end the call but he suddenly spoke,

"Saddie, are you mad at me?"

I immediately closed the call. I could pretend that I never even heard that if Dawson brought up the talk.

Oh, Moon Goddess, save this child of yours…

With him running a business, there was NO way Dawson would be oblivious to this!

Why did he even ask? Was he simply trying to make sure and calm me down later?

Then, I shook my head.

I need to stop this.

I promised myself that I wouldn’t get mad at him anymore since we’d end our relationship.