In the darkness, I had been waiting for a long time before pretending to turn over casually.

The next second, the hand around my waist suddenly tightened, and a slightly hoarse voice came into my ears.

“Jocelyn, what do you want to do?”

I didn’t want to do anything. I just wanted to go home.

1

I had been locked in the house by Felix Lewis for half a month.

During this half month, he confiscated my phone and locked me in the house, not allowing me to contact anyone.

Every day, after he went to work, I was enveloped in a huge emptiness, staring at the ceiling alone.

I watered the flowers on the balcony over and over again with water flowing all over the floor.

I just numbly watched, without the mood to clean up.

The cat named Kitty panicked and looked at me pitifully.

This cat was very old and slept on the sofa every day.

It used to be a stray cat and wandered around my building for a long time.

After I secretly brought it home, my mom scolded me.

She didn’t like cats, dogs, or any small animals.

Unexpectedly, Felix secretly adopted it.

He kept the cat in the basement, giving it a shelter from wind and rain.

Now, the cat was leaning against me, its soft fur rubbing against my arm, and my heart felt a little warm.

Felix said it was Kitty.

Three months ago, I pretended to be drunk and confessed to Felix.

In the night, he pressed me against the corner of the wall and whispered in my ear, “Jocelyn, from now on, you can only be mine, forever.”

His voice was cold, with a bewitching power.

At that time, I was infatuated and mesmerized, without thinking about the true meaning of this sentence.

Now, I was Felix’s lover, but also his prisoner.

2

At 8 o’clock in the evening, the door rang. Felix pushed the door open and brought in a chill.

He changed his clothes, rubbed his hands fiercely, and then hugged me in his arms.

“Jocelyn, I’m back. Did you miss me today?”

His voice was very pleasant.

But his embrace made me feel unusually cold.

My body couldn’t help but tremble, but I didn’t want to struggle, letting him hold me in his arms.

“I missed you, a lot.”

I didn’t lie.

I had liked Felix for many years.

When he was 17, he stood under the banyan tree and smiled at me, wearing a blue striped shirt.

At that time, his smile was innocent, like rippling spring water.

That summer vacation, he helped me with my studies.

I had completely forgotten what I had learned.

My mind was full of his handsome profile, his every frown and smile, even the faint scent of lemongrass on him.

Felix was very aloof, even a bit solitary, but he was gentle to me.

This made me have many fantasies about him.

But I knew that he was a star in the sky, out of reach.

He had excellent grades and had been ranked first in the grade for years. At that time, he had already been admitted to the best university in the state.

As for me, my grades were average. If I could get into college, my parents would probably be overjoyed.

It was Felix who helped me to college.

He reorganized my notes, notes that even a poor student like me could understand.

He remembered every score of mine in every exam. Even if there was a 1-point improvement, I would receive a gift from him.

Sometimes it was a bag of snacks, sometimes it was a cup of coffee, and sometimes it was a handwritten letter.

The oppressive and boring life of high school seemed to be less difficult under Felix’s care.

I was like a fish lacking water, desperately swimming towards the ocean.

There was Felix and my youthful dreams.

I had liked Felix for many years.

Even though he was domineering and stubborn now, I still loved him.

Felix had warmed my entire youth.

I was a little afraid of him, but I still couldn’t let go of him.

This strange feeling made me feel ashamed.

He imitated my tone and sent messages to my family and friends, cutting off all my contact with the outside world and imprisoning me in this small house.

And yet, I still loved him.

This despicable thought made me a little disgusted with myself.

I thought I was probably seriously sick.

3

Felix seemed satisfied with my answer. He leaned in to kiss me, but I dodged.

His face immediately darkened.

After a while, he reached out and pressed my head against his chest, gently sniffing my hair, then turned and went into the kitchen.

In no time, a delicate meal was placed on the table.

All dishes were spicy food I liked.

Before becoming my boyfriend, he had already made meals for me.

We sat silently at the table, and he kept putting food into my bowl.

“Jocelyn, eat more. You’re too thin,” Felix said.

His voice was still as gentle and pleasant as ever, and the corners of his mouth slightly curved upwards, indicating that he was in a good mood.

Apart from imprisoning me, he was really a very good lover.

The food in my bowl was almost overflowing, but he kept serving me.

He only scooped half a spoonful of soup for himself.

I just remembered that he couldn’t eat spicy food, not even a little bit.

He couldn’t eat any of these dishes.

He cooked for so long, just to see me eat.

At this moment, he was sitting across from me, with a faint smile on his face. He was so gentle.

Tears welled up in my eyes all of a sudden, and I couldn’t hold back.

He panicked immediately. He put down his chopsticks, and half squatted beside my feet, holding my hand, his eyes full of concern and distress.

“Jocelyn, what’s wrong? Are you feeling uncomfortable?”

I just shook my head, closed my eyes slightly, and didn’t want to look at him.

After Felix went to college, his father never gave him a penny.

He applied for a student loan for tuition fees, and his living expenses were earned from part-time jobs.

During the day when he had classes, he took the time to organize notes for me, and tutored in the evenings and weekends.

He spun like a top, sometimes even without time to eat.

He had a few doughnuts in his bag and ate them casually when he was hungry.

These were all gradually told to me by his roommate.

He had always lived a frugal life, but had never been stingy with me.

He always remembered the snacks I loved to eat and the coffee I loved to drink.

Now he was already a supervisor in the company, but he still remained the habits from many years ago.

I hated him so much, but when I see him eat, I couldn’t help but feel sad in my heart.

How did he get through his four years of college?

4

The meal was tasteless.

He sat me down on the sofa, turned on the TV for me, selected the variety show that I used to like the most, and then went into the kitchen.

Soon, the sound of gurgling water came from the kitchen.

I stared at the TV, my mind in a state of chaos.

After he finished cleaning the dishes, he came over and sat next to me, gently rubbing his face against my ear.

“Jocelyn, you smell good.”

His voice was a little hoarse, and the warm breath sprayed on my face, causing a slight tremor in my heart.

In an instant, I stood up in panic and jumped to the other side of the sofa.

His face instantly turned cold, with a layer of mist in his eyes.

“Jocelyn, are you so afraid of me?”

Half a month ago, if he asked me like this, I would definitely jokingly tell him, “I’m so scared. You’re so powerful, and how can I not be afraid of you?”

But at this moment, as I stared at his face, I didn’t know how to answer for a while.

My body couldn’t help but tremble again.

“Felix, give me back my phone. I want to go home.”

His face became even colder, and then he forcefully pulled me into his arms.

“Jocelyn, do you want to abandon me?”

I suddenly felt a wave of disgust in my heart and pushed him away.

“Felix, I’ve explained to you before. That guy is just my junior. I don’t even know his name.”

Earlier, a junior inexplicably confessed to me.

And Felix happened to see this scene.

Although I rejected the junior, Felix was still very angry.

Half a month ago, when I went to my roommate’s birthday party, that junior was there too.

He quietly stood behind me when taking photos.

And this became evidence of my infidelity.

I really couldn’t explain.

Felix didn’t even give me a chance to explain. He directly locked me in the room.

“Jocelyn, you’re lying. Are you afraid of me? Don’t you love me anymore? Why do you always want to leave me? Isn’t it good to be with me?”

His voice was so gloomy and his eyes were bloodshot, as if he wanted to eat me.

I instinctively wanted to escape, but he pressed me down on the sofa.

He buried his head in my arms, like a gentle big dog, and warm tears wet my clothes.

But I knew it has sharp fangs.

5

At night, he pulled out the mat and slept by my bed as usual.

For the past half month, he had been sleeping on the floor like this.

It was cold and hard, but he didn’t mind at all.

Once I got up at night and accidentally stepped on his chest.

He groaned and didn’t move for a long time.

I knelt beside him in fear, not knowing what to do for a moment.

He took a deep breath and held me in his arms, gently saying, “Jocelyn, give me a kiss, and the pain will go away.”

At this moment, the dim light shone on his face, softening his usually cold expression.

He looked really handsome, and he was in good shape.

He had been working out consistently during the few months, and anyone would be irresistibly attracted to him.

We looked at each other in silence for a long time.

“The floor is too cold. Why don’t you come to bed?”

He immediately had a bright smile on his face, and there seemed to be countless stars hidden in his eyes.

Then he quickly flipped over and held me in his arms, gently biting my ear.

“Jocelyn, is it okay?”

His voice was soft, like a feather falling on my heart.

I trembled in fear.

He clearly sensed my fear, and silently hugged me for a while. He kissed me on my cheek and then turned over and lay on the floor again.

“Forget it. I’m afraid I can’t control myself.”

I blushed and turned my head, afraid to look at him.

If it were before, I would naturally be willing.

But now, I was not sure whether we would be together in the future.

After a while, he reached out and turned off the bedside lamp.

The bedroom immediately plunged into darkness, with only a patch of moonlight in front of the window.

In the dark, his eyes were bright.

“Jocelyn, I love you, very much.”

6

That night was so long.

I stared at the moonlight outside the window.

I couldn’t figure out why Felix I liked when I was young suddenly became like this.

No, it didn’t seem sudden.

Everything was traceable, but I just chose to ignore it.

He had always been wary of me contacting men, except for my dad. And almost everyone else was his imaginary enemy.

My contact list and chat records must be available for him to check at any time.

I had to report in advance every time I went out.

My roommates once all jokingly laughed at me.

Although I felt uncomfortable, I still felt sweet in my heart.

At that time, he was just suspicious and did not take any extreme actions.

But now, he completely cut off all my social interactions and control me within this small space.

He still kept saying he loved me.

But this kind of love was not like the feelings between lovers, but more like raising a pet.

In a daze, I feel that Felix was in bed again.

He sniffed my neck and hugged me tightly.

My nose was filled with his refreshing breath, which cannot be blown away.

His breath was so light, blowing on my neck, warm and itchy.

He fell asleep without any distractions and soon slept soundly.

But I couldn’t sleep at all.