Because of James' plea, I went along with it.

Every day I smiled and listened to Eva talk about how good James was to her. It felt like my heart was being torn apart. My nails almost dug into my palms, but I still smiled and went along with it.

I didn't dare show my jealousy.

Even though I was sure that if Eva knew I liked James, she wouldn't care and would confidently say, "Sorry, but James likes me."

But still, I continued.

Because James would be unhappy.

Facing Eva's scrutiny, I put on my biggest smile. "I introduced him to you because I don't like him."

Eva said, "Really?"

"Really."

Eva affectionately pinched my nose and said meaningfully, "That's good. Otherwise, I'd feel like a bad person for showing off my love in front of you."

I smiled. "How could you be a bad person?"

"You're the one James likes. You're the luckiest person."

"Since you don't like him, we will bring you along on our dates. You wouldn't mind, right?"

I couldn't smile anymore and murmured, "I don't mind."

I went from just listening to her talk about her love with James to actually being involved and watching it firsthand.

James was just as gentle as Eva described.

No, even more so.

When eating, he would personally tie an apron around Eva.

When crossing the street, he would hold her hand and slow his pace to match hers.

Then he would take her to the flower shop and buy her favorite lilies.

Eva would smile happily and say, "How did you know lilies are my favorite?"

"Because I like lilies too. We have the same tastes."

I watched silently.

"No, that's not true.

James doesn't like lilies."

When I finished my college entrance exams at eighteen, I brought a bunch of lilies to see James.

I wanted to say, "I got into your university. I like you a lot. Can you give me a chance?"

James looked at the flowers I was holding and seemed to know what I wanted to say.

He knocked the flowers out of my hands and interrupted my confession.

He frowned and said, "Why buy those? They're delicate and hard to take care of."

After saying that, he turned away. He was stopping my confession in its tracks.

Until now, I haven't been able to say it.

That night, after James dropped Eva off at her dorm, he sent me a message. He told me to come downstairs and warned, "Stop following us on our dates."

I said, "It's not me following you. It's Eva who wants me to come along."

James got angry. "Can't you refuse?"

James wasn't the type to get angry. Over the years, he had been impatient and annoyed but never really angry at me.

This was the first time.

I thought about it and said, "Eva knows I like you."

This was the first time James got angry at me, and it was also the first time I told him I liked him.

I had imagined countless times how to say "I like you."

I thought it would be romantic. Even though James didn't care, I liked preparing little romantic gestures for him.

I flew a paper plane with a smiley face from his window to his desk.

On the day I planned to confess, I folded 520 little hearts day and night and secretly stuffed them into his bed.

Every year on James's birthday, I not only gave him a gift but also drew him a picture.

The drawing had him in it, with a little me looking at him from behind.

My love was never loud or outspoken.

But it was expressed countless times in silence.

I looked at James intently.

I was waiting for him to respond to my first confession.

James looked at me and tapped my forehead.

Just like when we were kids, I would follow him around. I was smiling foolishly, and he would tap my forehead.

Back then, he would say, "Go play," with a bit of a doting tone.

But now, his eyes were filled with irritation. "How could you be so stupid to let her find out?"

I didn't know what to say.

I just felt my heart ache as if it was about to stop beating.

James continued, "If you mess up our relationship, see how I'll deal with you."

James walked away with big strides.

I went back too.

That night, lying in bed, I heard James's voice message to Eva.

His breath was faint, smiling, gentle, and affectionate.

"Good night, sweetheart."

It was the kind of gentleness and affection I never had.

At that moment, I realized I regretted it.

I regretted introducing Eva to James because I feared he'd dislike me.

I regretted posting that picture with Eva on Twitter.

I even regretted falling for him.

Eva climbed onto my bed, laughing. "Your childhood friends are visiting the city. James is taking me to meet them tomorrow. You should come with us."

I ignored her and turned away to sleep.

The next day, James called, "Come with Eva at noon."

He was bossy as if he knew I wouldn't argue once he asked.

I really couldn't argue and followed the well-dressed Eva to meet James's friends.

They were our mutual childhood friends.

When they saw me, they joked as usual. "Hey, James. Hey, Alice."

Eva's face turned pale instantly.

James clicked his tongue and held Eva's hand. "Stop calling her that. This is your sister-in-law."

He hugged Eva and kissed her forehead.

I stood frozen, silently watching the sweet couple with our childhood friends.

I understood why James wanted me there.

He thought my deep feelings for him would affect his relationship with Eva.

So he publicly exposed my feelings for him in front of everyone.

He also made it clear that he didn't like me to give Eva a sense of security.

It was indirectly making me give up.

Facing the sympathetic or pitying looks from our friends who knew about my silent love for James for years, I realized my last bit of hope was completely shattered.

But strangely, I felt a calmness I had never experienced before.

I gave a small smile and turned to leave, but my wrist was grabbed.

The skin was warm to the touch.

I looked up and saw Zac.

Zac pulled me behind him. He was smiling as he looked at everyone, stopping at James's face. "It's not a joke. Alice is indeed their sister-in-law because I'm pursuing her."

Zac led me out of the room.

Zac let go of my hand. He leaned against the hallway wall, looked at me for a long time. He then bent down to meet my eyes and softly called my name.

"Alice."

His gaze was gentle. His voice even gentler.

I couldn't help but respond with a soft "Hmm."

"Why do you think I said that?"

My dad was a math teacher, but he didn't teach my class. He taught Zac's class.

For three years in middle school and three years in high school, the name that often came up at home wasn't Alice. It was Zac.

The "perfect kid" in my parents' eyes was Zac.

My parents liked him a lot. They said he was tall, handsome, smart, polite, and well-mannered.

But he wasn't polite to me. He liked to pull my braids and steal my backpack on the way home so I'd chase him. And he unfolded the little hearts I made for James to turn them into frogs.

He'd end by saying, "Alice is a big dummy, having a one-sided crush. It's so embarrassing."

When Zac asked, I thought for a moment. "Because you saw my awkwardness and thought I was too embarrassing, so you helped me out. Thanks..."

Zac interrupted. "No."

I froze and looked up at him.

Zac's eyes were red. He bent down, leaning on his knees, and looked at me. "James is dating someone. Alice, stop waiting for him."

Over the many years of my one-sided pursuit of James, I had wavered.

But I still held on.

Now my heart was calm.

I didn't know how to respond to Zac.

Especially since Zac had bent down to meet my eyes.

In my mind, Zac was even prouder than James.

Tall and handsome, he used to face groups of girls confessing to him with a lazy but straight-backed attitude, saying, "I need to focus on my studies."

I pursed my lips to speak, but heard the door next to me open.

I looked over.

I saw James peeking out halfway.

His eyes were staring straight at me.

Then Eva appeared, holding his arm.

Before I could react, I was pulled behind Zac again.

Zac straightened up, standing in front of me.

My heartstrings quietly twanged.

After James and Eva returned to their room, I tugged on Zac's sleeve.

"Are you hungry?"

Zac said, "Yes."

Zac took me to the spaghetti place I often went to alone.

He led me to the seat I always sat in.

He prepared the sauce I always had.

I looked at everything in front of me, feeling puzzled. "How did you know to bring me here?"

"Whenever you're upset, you come here to eat spaghetti alone. You always feel better after," Zac said, handing me a pair of utensils. "I'll wait outside."

I grabbed his sleeve as he was about to leave. "How did you know?"

Zac's eyes held a hint of bitterness. "Alice, you're such a dummy."

When Zac used to call me a dummy, I'd lightly retort, saying he was the dummy.

But back then, his tone was teasing. Now, it wasn't.

It carried a faint sadness.

I didn't argue, just waited quietly for him to speak.

Zac said, "I knew you'd follow James to this city, so I came in his second year here. I've been watching you ever since."

Zac pointed outside the window. "Watching you from there."

Zac withdrew his hand and looked at me. "Alice, while you were liking James, I was silently liking you. For many, many years."