My mate is Ryder Blackwood, Alpha of the pack.

As the approaching bonding ceremony, he tells me that his "savior", Isabelle Morrison, is dying. She took a silver dagger meant for him three years ago. Now she is terminal, and her days are numbered.

Her last wish, he says, is to leave behind a pup bearing the strongest Alpha blood.

I tremble. "What about me? I'm your only mate."

His voice is cold, emptied of feeling. "Don't worry. I'll always be your mate."

Two days later, I receive the pregnancy test results. Isabelle is five weeks along.

Turns out there was never a choice. All I get is a belated notice.

What he doesn't know is that I'm the one who took the silver dagger meant for him three years ago. The healer tells me I have, at most, a month to live.

I neither weep nor protest. I cancel the bonding ceremony I've dreamed of and quietly book a flight out. It leaves on the very day of the ceremony.

Ryder stands at the venue of the canceled ceremony when my message reaches him. It's my unwavering rejection of him as my mate. That's when he finally breaks.

For the first time, the Alpha who controls everything tastes a fear that tears the soul. He searches for me frantically, only to find every trace of me erased from his world.

Three years ago, while saving my mate, Ryder Blackwood, I was poisoned by Silverblood. But he believed his childhood sweetheart, Isabelle Morrison, was the one who had saved him. Now, I learned that he wanted to give her a pup.

I called off the bonding ceremony I'd been dreaming of, booked a flight out for that very day, and braced myself to face death alone.

…

"I need to give Isabelle a pup."

Ryder's words cut through the quiet of morning.

Two weeks ago, I felt that something was wrong. After a checkup at the infirmary, I learned that Silverblood had been in me far longer than I'd realized.

I meant to tell Ryder about the diagnosis today. But when I heard him, I opened my mouth and said nothing.

The thorns of the white roses pricked my fingers, and crimson drops found their way onto the petals.

I turned toward Ryder, praying it was only a cruel joke.

He was in a black suit, dressed for Bluemoon Group's board meeting. His expression was set like stone, and the Alpha presence he held was palpable.

"Lyra, we'll use artificial insemination," he said, adjusting his cufflinks without so much as a glance at me. "You shouldn't take offense. This is a reasonable arrangement."

My knees went weak. Silverblood burned through my veins.

The healer said I had, at most, a month to live. For that one month, all I wanted was to complete the bonding ceremony with my fated mate.

"Why?" I asked, holding the bouquet so tight the stems snapped. "I'm your fated mate, Ryder, chosen by the Moon Goddess."

"That's exactly why you should understand," he said. His voice was ice cold as he straightened his tie. "This is about the pack's future and keeping our stability intact."

Pain ripped through my chest. But this time, it wasn't Silverblood. It was a boot pressing down, grinding against my heart.

I took in the hard line of his profile and remembered his gentle smile from our first meeting. I remembered the vow he'd made to protect me for life.

My voice was barely a whisper. "What about me? Where do I fit in your plan?"

He finally looked at me. Impatience was flickering in his eyes. "You're my mate. That doesn't change. But duty comes before personal feelings."

I gathered what little strength I had left and cried, "No! I won't agree to this!"

Ryder's gaze turned predatory in an instant. "If you won't consider the good of the pack, do you deserve to be my pack's Luna?"

His phone rang. Isabelle's name lit up on the screen.

When he picked up, the ice in his voice thawed into tenderness. "What's wrong? Don't worry, I'll handle it. Alright, I'll be right there."

The gentleness he reserved for her and the care he lavished on her was all I'd ever dreamed of and never had.

When he hung up, he said, "I'm not coming home tonight. Isabelle isn't feeling well. She needs me."

"Ryder!"

I reached for him, but he'd already turned away.

The door slammed shut, leaving me alone among scattered petals.

I crossed to the fireplace and fed the ruined white roses to the flames. The petals curled, blackened, and turned to ash, like our love.

I thought Ryder would let it go after my outright refusal, that he might reconsider. After all, we'd been unshakable until then. We were fated mates, blessed by the Moon Goddess.

But two days later, a courier delivered an unmarked package. I opened it to find the pregnancy test results from the infirmary.

"Patient name: Isabelle Morrison.

"Gestational age: Five weeks.

"Authorized by: Ryder Blackwood."

It was dated three weeks earlier.

I laughed. It was a bitter sound edged with despair. There had never been a choice. What I got was nothing but a notice, long after it no longer mattered.

Everything had been scripted long ago, including my reaction, my pain, and my final surrender.

The bonding ceremony I'd once longed for now felt pointless. If Ryder wanted another she-wolf's pup, how could I stop him with my dying body?

I picked up my phone and started making calls. I canceled the ceremony venue, called off the florist, and scrapped the last alterations to my gown.

Then, I retrieved the bonding tokens I'd crafted myself—a pair of gemstone rings engraved with the Moon Goddess' blessing. I cast them into the flames.

The fire swallowed their silver gleam and burst in a blinding flare.

By the time Ryder came home that night, I'd already finished everything. He sank onto the couch. His expression was grave.

"We need to talk about Isabelle," he said.

I watched him in silence.

Ryder's tone turned severe. "She's terminally ill. She doesn't have much time left. Her final wish is to leave behind a pup bearing the strongest Alpha blood. But more than that…"

His eyes went cold as he continued, "Three years ago, Isabelle stepped in front of a silver dagger meant for me. I owe her my life."

"So what?" I asked.

There was command in his eyes, a weight I could feel. He went on, and his voice was still solemn. "As my mate, you should put the greater good first. This pays what is owed and binds two families in blood.

"You need to understand. We can still raise that pup as our own. And you'll remain the Luna. Don't worry."

"As the Luna, why should I raise a pup you had with someone else?" I asked. My heart had gone cold.

I finally saw it for what it was. To Ryder, the pack, power, and that so-called debt would always matter more than the mate the Moon Goddess gave him.

His phone rang again. It was Isabelle.

Ryder answered. His voice went soft in a heartbeat. "Isabelle? What's wrong? Don't cry. I'll be right there. Wait for me. I'm on my way."

I sank to the floor after Ryder rushed out. I stared at the date on the pregnancy test results and replayed that night in my mind.

Five weeks ago, he said he had border duty and might not be back until morning. I packed him a hot meal and told him to be careful.

I waited on the couch until 3:00 am. Only when his text came—"Arrived. All safe."—did I finally fall asleep.

He was with Isabelle that night at the infirmary for the artificial insemination. I'd been shut out from the start.

…

My phone rang. It was Lucas Pearce, my healer.

His voice was thick with concern. "Lyra, your latest test results don't look good. The toxin is spreading faster than we expected."

"I know."

I looked at the sunlight beyond the window. It felt a world away.

I could feel Silverblood slowly spreading through my veins every morning when I woke. Sometimes the pain jolted me awake at night, but I never let Ryder see it.

The truth was, I wished he'd notice me and care for me, even a little. My medical report was sitting right there on the dresser in our room, but he'd never even opened it.

He seemed far more concerned with another she-wolf's pregnancy.

Lucas was a good healer and one of the few friends I had left.

He said, "About that new experimental treatment—"

"It's no use, Lucas." I cut him off. My voice was steady. "Silverblood can't be cured. You told me that. Those experimental treatments would only prolong the pain."

There was silence on the line.

When he spoke again, his voice was gentle. "Would you… be willing to get out for a bit? Let Ryder take you somewhere to rest. A change of scenery might do you good."

"You mean a trip?"

"Yes. Haven't you always said you wanted to see the ocean? There's a quiet little town on the coast that's quite restful."

Then, I remembered. It was where Ryder and I had planned to spend our honeymoon.

There were deep-blue waters, an old stone church, and cobbled paths lined with flowers. We'd gone through the photos together, plotting the trips we'd take after the bonding ceremony.

All these years, I'd poured myself into Ryder's pack affairs and had never really seen the world. Now, with the ceremony off, I'd go to that town alone.

"I'll go on my own. When can I leave?" I asked.

"Whenever you're ready," Lucas said.

I checked the calendar on the wall. The date for the bonding ceremony was circled in red, 15 days out.

"In 15 days, then. I'll leave on the day of the ceremony."

"Lyra—"

"I've made up my mind, Lucas." I cut him off. "Ryder never truly valued our bond. The ceremony means nothing. I'm canceling it."

I hung up and stood before the mirror.

A pale she-wolf looked back. She was hollow-eyed. Silverblood was eating away at me, bit by bit. Ryder didn't even know I was dying. He didn't need to know. Not anymore.

I pulled out my suitcase and began to pack. There would be no more waiting, no more begging, no more scraping by under his cold indifference. I was leaving.

I would live for myself in the time I had left.

…

At dusk, I sat in the living room, waiting for Ryder to get back. He finally came in at 2:00 am, reeking of Isabelle's perfume.

He frowned as if my presence annoyed him. "You're still up?"

"I was waiting for you."

He shed his coat, saying offhand, "Isabelle's pregnancy symptoms were bad. I took her to the healer. This is going to happen a lot from now on. Get used to it."

I was supposed to get used to it?

I stood. "I understand. Ryder, there's something I need to tell you."

He checked his watch. "Tell me tomorrow. I'm tired."

"The ceremony—"

He cut me off. "Don't worry about the ceremony. I'll arrange everything. Just show up on time."

I watched his tired profile and thought of the date on the pregnancy test results.

Everything had been decided long ago. My voice had never mattered. I lingered in the wings of his life like a prop, quietly waiting for the moment I would be replaced.

"Fine. I understand," I said.

Ryder went upstairs without so much as a backward glance.

Alone in the living room, I stared at the date circled in red on the calendar. Every tie between Ryder and me would be severed for good in 15 days.

We'd never see each other again after that.

"What on earth is going on?"

"Why did Alpha Ryder visit Isabelle's family and even officially announce that she's pregnant?"

"But Alpha Ryder and Healer Lyra are supposed to have their bonding ceremony any day now."

The chatter outside my office gnawed at my nerves.

My phone buzzed. A coworker had sent a photo.

Ryder's hand rested gently on Isabelle's belly. His gaze was steady and protective. Around them stood the Morrison elders. Their faces were alight with joy.

A message from the coworker popped up in a tone laced with sympathy. "Why is Isabelle pregnant? They look like true mates. Are you okay, Lyra?"

I stared at the photo. Ryder had never looked at me that way. Five years in, he still hadn't formally introduced me to the Blackwood elders.

Whenever I brought up the subject, he'd say, "Your family still needs time to prove itself."

I saw it now for what it was—an excuse.

"I'm fine," I typed back, then tossed my phone aside.

Silverblood burned hotter in my veins, searing every nerve. Pain raked through me. I knew my time was running out. My life was ticking by with every second.

…

The next afternoon, I met a few friends at a cafe. I'd planned to invite them to my bonding ceremony. Instead, all I could do was tell them it was canceled. Their eyes went wide.

One of them blurted, "What? The ceremony's canceled? Why? You were so excited about your bonding ceremony with Ryder. Did you two have a falling out?"

The others crowded closer, and their faces were full of shock and confusion.

I stirred my coffee. "Ryder has more pressing matters to attend to. He has to have a pup with Isabelle. Even if it's through artificial insemination, I can't bring myself to accept it."

My friend frowned. "Isabelle? The she-wolf who says she saved him? But Lyra, you're his mate."

I managed a bitter smile. "So what if we're the Moon Goddess' chosen mates? In Ryder's eyes, the pack will always come before personal feelings."

My mind went back to the rainy night I first met Ryder. Rogues were on my heels, and he'd pulled me back from the brink of death.

From then on, I was deeply in love with this powerful, aloof Alpha.

For five years, I believed our love was unshakable. Only when Isabelle appeared did I realize how fragile my place in his heart was. I couldn't tell anymore whether what I felt for Ryder was gratitude or love.

One of my friends closed a hand over mine. "Lyra… this isn't fair."

I drew my hand back. "Fairness has nothing to do with it. I've stopped caring. Sorry, I'm tired. I'm heading home."

…

It was past 11:00 pm when I dragged myself home. I pushed the door open to find Ryder in the living room, still wearing the dust of the road.

His brows knitted the instant he saw me. His nostrils twitched. He stepped back, disgust turning his voice rough. "You smell of other wolves. Stay back."

I stopped cold. This was my home, and my mate was recoiling because my friends' scent was on me.

"You're worried it'll affect Isabelle?" I asked.

Ryder sounded as if it were only natural. "She's sensitive right now. She can't be exposed to anything that might harm the pup. From now on, tell me before you go out, and shower as soon as you get back."

I took in the angles of his cold profile, and the last warmth in me went out. I'd already become a potential threat in his eyes.

"Understood," I said, turning for the stairs.

"Wait," Ryder called after me. "I need you to do something."

I stopped with my back to him and waited. What would he want me to give up this time for the so-called greater good?

"Call off tomorrow's pre-ceremony photo shoot," Ryder said. His voice echoed through the living room.

I turned to him, keeping my face blank.

I nodded. "Fine. I'll let the photographer know."

He clearly hadn't expected me to agree so readily. He hesitated, as if whatever speech he'd prepped suddenly had nowhere to go.

"Aren't you going to ask why?"

I kept my voice even. "It doesn't matter. You're the one who makes the calls anyway, aren't you?"

Silverblood was making me weaker by the day. I didn't have it in me to argue anymore. I was dying anyway, so what did it matter if we did the photo shoot or not?

Ryder frowned and went on. "I'm not calling the whole thing off. I'm saying… someone else will take your place."