©S A F I E

CHAPTER 4

ELLE

*Flashback *

"Gabriel," I whispered, a bit nervous about what his reaction might be. He opened his eyes and I can't help but smile as he wrinkles his nose, scratching his head. He blinks his eyes up at me, a question apparent on them.

"Happy birthday." I smiled and push the birthday cake in front of him.

"Elle-" his eyebrows scrunched up as his eyes searched my face. "Why are you--?"

"I want to surprise you. You are my husband and I am ought to care for you. I want to make you happy. Rise from your bed and have a bite of this, I promise you won't regret it." I push a spoon on his hand and gave him a sheepish smile. He sat there, frozen on top of the bed, a spoon on his hand. I am almost tempted to take a picture of him for he looks a lot like a model but halted as I see his brows slowly meeting in the middle and he glared down at the cake, saying. "Is this the scene where the wife finally decided to kill her husband?"

His words made me smile and say a little 'no' because inside, I am burning so bright of irritation for this man. I mean, can't he just say ‘thank you’ to me? He's pushing my patience and making me wish that I did put some poison on the cake. I should try and do that next time.

I am so distracted with my own thoughts that I am surprised to hear him moan, "God. I haven't tasted a chocolate cake this good in my entire life" His eyes captured mine before he pulled me in and stuff some cake on my mouth, catching me off guard. The sweet malty taste made my tastebuds explode and I have little to no control of the moan I let out.

"Now we die together," Gabriel smiled at me with his teeth covered with the triple chocolate cake I baked. He looks so adorable and young, I wish he is always as playful as this. Bowing my head, I enjoyed the taste of chocolate inside my mouth, watching Gabriel as he finishes the whole cake, his cheeks tinted with the chocolate ganache.

Oh well, Mr West, you might not mean it but I am dying to make you love me back.

*flashback ends*

I am dazed as the memory faded in the back of my head. Staring at his glorious face, I snap myself back to the present and to the book I am reading. We sat by the parlour, him staring out to the forest while I am sat by the window, staring aimlessly at the pages laid on my lap. The morning sun is now high up in the sky, announcing mid-afternoon; the breeze has ceased, replaced by the ever prickly warm haze. I huff, shifting my feet so that I am leaning by the window pane.

"Elle, what would you like to do for the rest of the day rather than spending it with your book?" I stared at him for a while as he leaned across the open doors, his head tilted to the view of the forest, as though he isn't really talking to me. I raised an eyebrow at him and he turns, making me flustered once again "What? I thought you wanted to spend a day with me? I am giving you the chance." The smile that he gave me tug at my heartstrings that I almost choke on my next words.

Glancing down at the book on my lap, I said in a shaky voice, "How does the beach sound for you?"

"The beach?" He turned his full attention at me, his eyebrows raised. He moves closer to the window where I am sitting at, his stance inquisitive as he crosses his arms over his chest, flexing those biceps that made me want to drool. I cleared my throat and held his gaze instead, avoiding the temptation, bracing myself for the question that will surely come out of his smart mouth. "Why would you like to go to the beach?"

"For the same reason as other people have! It's in the middle of the summer now and I haven't even heard the crash of water on the shore. I want to bury myself in the sand, bathe in the sun and smell the humid air...I want to--"

"Okay. Okay." He rolled his eyes and snorted, " You sound like a dying patient." He struts out of the door, leaving me speechless. I am tempted to throw the book at him but I wouldn't. This book is too precious for me; I wouldn't ruin it for a man such as him, he's not worth my first edition book. I should've snatched a pillow from the sofa.

Standing up from the window, I headed up the stairs and to my bedroom. I entered the closet, rummaging for something I can wear for the beach. I pulled a sundress and a piece of swimsuit, and marched inside the en-suite bathroom, removing my clothes. I am halfway through pulling the dress down on my chest area when Gabriel entered the bathroom. He stands there, like a deer caught in headlights, drowning in his own drool.

"Like what you see?" I am surprised when the words escaped my mouth. I barely had the time to cover my face in embarrassment when I heard his chuckle, giving me the sudden urge to hurl my slippers at his head as I hear his remark.

"Pssh, you barely had a C, love, which is why I am not that impress. 2You have the body of a teenage girl, so skinny!" He laughs again, strutting out of the bathroom and locking the door behind him.

That git! He doesn't know what he's talking about because he isn't a woman. Puffing my chest, I am surprised when I heard his voice from the other side of the room, "Hey, what's taking you so long? Have you been already swimming in the toilet?!"

"Git!" I hissed, pushing open the door and ending up face to face with the devil himself. "All that is coming out of your mouth is crap, Gabriel! If I could only--"

I momentarily stopped my blubber as I watch him change into a pair of board shorts. "Like what you see?" He quoted back to me and I can't help but blush at that as I tried to go back inside the bathroom "Love, you already see all of this and yet you still act so shy." His gaze was so intense that I was caught in a trance.

My mind flashes back to his strong torso and his biceps as he grabs me, pulling me closer. I can almost feel his hands brushing the sides of my face, sliding down so that they settle on the nape of my neck. Still, his hands slide further down until he is holding my breast. His whispers tickle my ears as I succumb to the feeling of haven he has provided while I writhe in his arms, a prey to his love.

It was all too much and his intense gaze at me is making my breath hitch. I felt my cheeks growing hotter by the second. I cleared my throat, "Nope. You are wrong. I can't see clearly in the dark. Plus, there's nothing wrong with what I'm doing. I am your wife." I stated as a matter of fact. The blush is still adorning my cheeks and spreading to my neck, making me scratch my ear and hold his amused gaze.

"Everything is right with what you are doing, love." He pulled my hand and I cannot help but smirk at him.

•

ONE DAY. It's only for today and I can't believe he has given me a day to spend with him.

"Now, are you happy?" His face was almost funny but the seriousness in his voice made me stop.

We just arrived at the beach. I take the basket and followed Gabriel as he strode off - such weird sight that is expected from the couple like us, a billion worth couple strutting in plain sight, hoping not to be recognized. I know that there is a lot of risk because of what I had suggested but this is the only place I want to visit now. I wore my glasses and look around the vicinity, expecting the paparazzi tailing us from behind the stalls, ruining Gabriel's mood. I look up to see him still frowning down in the sand, "Gabe, what's wrong?"

He sighs, scratching his forehead, "Nothing."

"Tell me, Gabriel." I urge for him but he just looks down at me. He sighs. I lay the baskets and blankets down on the sand and hear him, mutter, “Later."

"Fine." I stuck my tongue out and walked faster than him, leaving him with all the baskets and blanket. "Elle, help me with this!" His words were drowned as I rush unto the waves and shrieked.

God, I never felt this happy before ever since I have married the devil.

Looking back at the shore, I spotted him, frowning at me. He has already spread the blanket under him and is now eating a sandwich, "Gabe, swim with me!" He shakes his head making his sunglasses fall from his head and to the bridge of his nose, looking ridiculously hot. The sight of him reminds me of those French guys I have come to be acquainted with over the years I have spent in Paris - his curly brown hair and sharp jaw is definitely a kill. He waved his hand as he holds the sandwich, sticking his tongue out.

"Don't be such a party pooper, Gabriel!"

I got out of the water and headed for the shore trying to pull him up from his seat but it was no use; he was far stronger and heavier than me. "Gabe, please?" I pulled his shirt and mocked a cry but he only frowned at me and resumes his date with the sandwich. I gritted my .teeth, annoyed that he is being a bum. "Alright, then. If this is your idea of spending the 24 hours you sacrifice for me - letting me enjoy myself while you stay here, dating with a sandwich, and not even bothering to enjoy the beach with me - fine! I hope you are happy." I turn around and scowled at the crowd who was watching us deliberately, not even pretending that they are not aware.

I headed back to the sea, feeling down because of what I said to Gabriel. I know it is wrong for me to be that bossy but I am only stating my feelings. It is unfair because he has promised to spend a day with me, to make it up to me. I am about to dip my toes in the water when someone rushes over and pushed me.

"Oomph!" I gurgled, my throat constricting as I unexpectedly swallowed the seawater. With my burning eyes, I struggled to free myself but it felt like someone is holding me down. I was about to scream for Gabriel to help me when I am pulled out of the water and heard the devil himself, laughing at me.

"What's funny?" I look around, trying to spot him as I blink my eyes, trying to get rid of the water. I crane my neck and bump my head with someone, "Ouch!" I push my damp hair away from my face and impatiently wipe the water off my eyes, seeing him there, his eyebrows furrowed as he massages the side of his head. "Gabriel? I thought you don't want to--"

"I was kidding back there when I told you that I am not interested in playing here in the water. I wouldn't miss a chance like this," He adjusted his shades and look at me, "Though your face looks funny once you realized that you are almost dying." His laugh sounds so irritating to me that I can't help but divert my gaze, my nose flaring as I let him finish his sentence, "So you are the one who pushed me? God, Gabriel! I almost drown." I shake my head at him and tucked a stray hair on my ear, a question at the tip of my tongue. "You thought it was funny to see me panicking and trying to call you for help?"

Gabriel stopped laughing and turned his attention at me, his face turning serious, "Elle that's --"

"No. I thought I was dying back there," I bit my lip, finally losing it. How can he joke about that? It's not cool at all. "And you just did it all for fun? What a sick idea you have for joking." My eyes burned of the emotions I am feeling. I bit back a sob, as I push the glasses up my nose and planned to march back to the shore, not wanting the curious attention I am getting from the crowd. I better escape from here while the paparazzi haven't figured out we are here. I breathe out, hugging myself tight. I can feel him drawing near and in an instant, his arms were around me, making me feel much horrible than before. "Gabriel," I remove his hands and frown at him, "Gabriel, let me take a break for a while. " I pushed him off me and walk back to the shore.

•

It was almost midday when I decided to leave the shade and find something delicious to eat for I wanted to cheer myself up, my thoughts in a jumble as I walk, dazed. Gabriel was nowhere to find and I decided not to drag him on my food trip. I'm mighty fine without his obnoxious behaviour. I do not need him teasing me every step of the way for he has a sick idea about what is fun and what is hurtful.

I am threading through the crowd of tourist when I found a hotdog stand. I ordered two jumbos and a fruit shake to go with it. Pulling my wallet from my handbag, I paid for the food and started to walk away. It was quiet at first then I heard them mumbling around me, before they erupted, the whole crowd laughing. I curiously stared at them and realize that it was me whom they are laughing about. I followed their gaze and was surprised that my dress was now split in a half, showing my cleavage and a bit of my breast. Blushing, I tried to cover myself with the drinks and two hotdog jumbo's on my hands but it was a futile attempt. I tried to hurry back to the shade Gabriel made for me back at the shore, my head bowed while I tried so hard to cover myself.

"Look at her body! God, she looks like she wanted to have sex with me, mate!"

"That was quite embarrassing."

"I wouldn't dare to walk around like that."

"Can you even imagine how small her tits are?"

"Sheesh, she must be so desperate to find a husband to walk around like that!"

"I would be displeased if she was my daughter. What a whore!"

I am feeling so down, my confidence hitting the bottom as I tried to quicken my pace. I was about to turn when I felt his presence. Gabriel's arms provided warmth all over my body as he shielded me from the curious crowd. Muttering something on my ear that I cannot comprehend, he carried me back to the car and closed the doors while I sob in my hands, the two hotdog jumbo's now stained with my tears as I cry.

"I'm so sorry, Gabriel. I have ruined this day." I muttered in my hands, tears trickling in my cheeks as I tried to suppress a sob, "It is so embarrassing. They've seen me naked! Oh, what will they tell about me?" Gabriel takes the hotdog from me and settled them at the back seat along with the drinks. "The media will laugh at me if they saw that. This is bad, really bad." Staring back at me, he huffed. He turns the engine on, putting the car in reverse as he speeds away from the beach.

It was silence before the storm and I could feel it - his heated glare on me when he is looking at me, his fist tightening around the steering wheel and his occasional huff. I know that he's angry at me. He is ashamed of me.

The tears slowly trickle down my cheeks, and I didn't even bother to wipe it off because of how I felt so hurt of his treatment at me. It hurts so much that even if I am the victim here, he is making it appear like I am at fault of everything that has happened. I didn't know that my clothes have split, showing my breast to the crowd who laughed at me. I have reduced myself to silently crying, staring out of the window. A couple of minutes have passed before all that I could hear is my sniffles as he slowly pulled over on the side of the road, cutting the engine.

"Shhhh," he pulled my chin up and kissed my forehead. “You did not ruin this day, I did. If I chose not to play a prank on you, you won't be angry and walk off alone. It was my fault. I should've been there with you. I was too confident on myself that you could handle yourself but I didn't realize that you are a woman. I am not saying it in a bad way - I just fail to realize the fact that you could be fragile even though sometimes you act like you are not." He wiped the tears on the sides of my face with his hands, smiling at me.

"I won't allow this day to end like this, Elle." he pulls my chin up as he made me look at him, "Tell me, how does ice cream, pizza and Wall-e sound for you?"

“Wall-e?”

©S A F I E

CHAPTER 5

ELLE

I open one of my eyes, the dizziness overwhelming me that I have to slowly rise from the bed and stagger towards the bathroom, the room spinning around me. It was the break of the dawn; too early for me to wake during a weekend.

I rested my hands on the walls as I struggled against it, trying to reach the toilet bowl before I barfed up. Not being able to withstand, I collapse on the floor and have managed to hold the toilet bowl tighter before my face hovers on it, inches away from the water as I empty my insides. I hug it closer to my chest, heaving at it without having anything to let go.

I've been like this for the past week and was getting weaker by the days passing. Gabe never had the chance to notice this because he's been away for Italy for almost a month now. I do not know the exact date of his return. Maybe next week or tomorrow morning? Tonight?

It was pointless to bug him about it because he wanted to surprise me. I rolled my eyes at that, pushing myself away from the bowl and leaning my back against the tub.

What am I going to tell him once he arrives and see me like this- like a zombie that has just resurrected?

I believe that he will be enraged by my appearance once he comes back. I have lost weight because I couldn't keep my food in. I wanted to go and have myself checked in the hospital though I felt lazy, sometimes I refused to leave the room and stay in bed, cuddled up in sheets and reading to myself.

What should I tell Gabriel once he goes back? That I've got the worst stomach flu of the history - a bug or something I've got because of eating too much ice cream? Or wait...

I momentarily stopped, my thoughts and ideas dissolving as I crawl my way back inside our room. I rummaged the bedside table and open the lock on my phone as I see the red sign blinking in my notification - quite confirm the assumptions I am having. I think I know why I am having this sickness for it's not considered as to how it appeared to be.

I should've got my period last month, and I have never been late in my whole life. This is it, what I have always wanted with Gabriel. I believe that my answers are finally answered. I finally have a chance. With desperation in my eyes, I hoist myself up, struggling to keep my balance as I stare at the girl reflected in the window.

"I'm going to take the test."

•

I smiled at the three pink positive signs staring at me.

I'm pregnant!

I danced around the bathroom and giggled some more. Who knows that I will be a mom after a few months? Have a little Elle or maybe little Gabe running around here while I busied myself looking after her or him, or them? I smiled, a wild look in my face that does not deem well with how thin I've become for the past few weeks.

Only 7 out of 10 women who have this result is as happy as me. One of them is underage, or have three kids already and doesn't want an additional problem or the other, which is a single woman who has a one night stand.

Like I care. I'm going to have what I wanted for so long. It's right in front of me now. Literally.

Out of habit, I begin to bite my nails as I think of the consequences of this. I'm a little bit nervous about what is going to happen to me and the baby when the contract is done but I forced myself to just shut it out and relax. I don't want stress clawing at my very face and make the baby feel worst. I can handle this.

I put the three pregnancy test in my bag and smiled. This will be the second happiest day of my life. The first one is when I married the love of my life -which, I'm not sure if he will be happy with this news but I want the baby. Yet, if he doesn't accept my baby and chose to react negatively towards my news, then I will protect my baby from him even if it is the last thing I will do.

I won't let him do anything to this little bean.

If I need not tell him until I'm showing, then fine. I'll do everything in my power to keep my baby safe. Even if it requires me to leave the love of my life just so this little bean would live happily, I will choose that rather than ending the life that has not even started in this world.

The thought of having a life inside of me is clearly a joyful moment. Especially that it's from Gabriel and me. I really need to be careful about everything that I do, and I won't have any coffee anytime soon. No stress and more rest, and lastly, I really want to have some pistachios, salted caramel kisses and vanilla Ice cream right now.

Making my decision, I snatch my purse and decided to meet up with someone I haven't seen for a long time.

•

"What? You're pregnant? I'm gonna be an aunt!" The female version of my husband screamed, slapping my face playfully before she hugs me back. It was almost painful for me to stare at Neola the same way as she does to me. It's hard for me to see the same reflection of my husband on her face and smile.

I just miss him too much.

It has been a month since I saw him and she just looks a lot like him. I wonder - will our child possess the same blue eyes as them or inherit my vivid green eyes that I am so in love with. Neola's curly hair is slightly bushy than that of Gabriel's - a trait of their Italian descent in their mother side, the Mancini's, which he rarely even talks about considering that Gabriel's mother has died when they are still kids.

I was suddenly distracted out of my thoughts when Neola piped in, "But you clearly know that my brother will be shocked to know this...it is unexpected." She smirks at me, her eyes filled with amusement, "What did you do to make my dear old brother succumb to your temptation, mistress?" she pointed an accusing finger at me and giggled.

I slap her finger and pouted, "Neola! I know that all he's going to say to me is N.O. and I won't have any say on it but it is done. The baby is here and he has to deal with it one way or another. This is a blessing; this little bean is very dear to me and I won't let Gabriel do anything to harm my baby!" My chest tightens and I sobbed, bursting into tears as I shoved a spoonful of ice cream into my mouth, muffling my cries.

Damn, hormones.

Neola gave me a look and wipe my tears with the Kleenex on her hand, "Shh, slow down. No stress for the little bean, right?" I glared at her as I shoved another spoonful inside my mouth, "Yet you are the one who is stressing me, Neola." She bites her lip and I smiled at that. Shoving another spoonful in my mouth, I moan at the sweet-smelling salted caramel kisses melting on my tongue.

"What are you going to do when he finds out about this?" She asked after I finish my ice cream.

I looked at her and smiled, "Nothing, I'll let it be. I won't do anything. I'm pretty sure that once he sees the photos of this little bean, he will accept it all. Gabriel is not that heartless." Neola gave me a confused look, frowning at the tub of ice cream in front of her.

"But you know my brother, Elle. He always gets what he wanted - all of his demands are always followed. He has plans for both of you. He doesn't, never in a million years, would want a kid, right? He has made it clear. You know he has--"

"I know that but, his reasons are lame! I just don't understand him..." I shoved another spoonful and watch her shoved her own share of the ice cream on her mouth.

"I don't even understand why he doesn't want a kid also. He's like twenty-nine already and the company is doing well. You and Gabriel are perfect, having a lovely house and lots of money, you can afford a dozen of children if you want to. " Neola shoves a spoonful of her own ice cream inside her mouth before scowling at me, "Yet against all this, how come he let you have your way? My brother's not that idiot when it comes to things like this, especially things he doesn't like." She gave me a curious look before turning her attention to her milkshake which still looks like untouched.

Because he's drunk and out of his mind, Neo, and that I partly lied to him. No. I won't tell her that.

I bite my lip and scratch my neck - a sign that I am nervous about lying at Neola. "Becawithe he arrived late that night and then-" Neola's eyes widen as she shakes her hands in front of her, exclaiming, "No need for those details! God, I don't want to know about your sexual this and that, woman. I'm clearly satisfied with the 'no sex before marriage thingy'. You know, I might be tempted." She winked at me, her fingers still covering her ears. I laughed at this silly twenty-two-year-old gal, shaking my head at how ridiculous she appears. "I just want to know how you persuade him to do it."

"Alright. It just....happened." I smiled at her as she grinned at me.

"That's it?"

I nodded and said. "You don't want to hear the details, right?"

She hastily pointed the spoon at me before deciding to shove it back into one of the tubs, "Never mind. Let's eat this pistachio ice cream now that we finished the salted caramel one. Oh, I remember! I ordered you some strawberry milkshakes. I heard that most pregnant women visiting this cafe ask for this special milkshake." She called for the waiter and I watch in horror as she laid the glass in front of us. Neo thank him and push the glass to me, "Your favourite, right?" She cheered but I just frowned back at the milkshake, "Are you okay, Elle?"

"I don't like strawberry at this moment...especially one on my milkshake," I stood up from my seat and headed in the bathroom to throw up.

•

I look down on my watch and waited some more.

He said he's gonna meet me up for dinner. He informed me that he will arrive late this evening instead of going back tomorrow morning. He said it'll take him only an hour before he arrives but why is it that he's not here yet?

It's almost midnight!

And the fact that I prepared his favourite dish even if it is hard to do makes me irritated at him. Pissed even. It made me so infuriated at him that I have this sudden urge to hurl the pan unto him as soon as he arrives. I tap my foot impatiently and glared at the time that is reflected at the grandfather clock.

I've gone almost everywhere today. From the café, then to the doctor before going to the store to buy the necessary ingredients I needed. I'm very thankful that Neola is there to be my company and driver since Taylor was with Gabriel, doing god-knows-what. She accompanied me to the hospital to have my very first check-up seeing as Gabriel wasn't with me

Doctor Eric told me that I'm 5 weeks pregnant. I'm a bit hesitant at first when he examined me because of the main reason that he's a guy. Though he assured me that he was actually gay. I almost laugh at how ridiculous I act, gawking when he asked me to strip and open up as he uses the wand to probe at 'my area'. I'm very thankful that he's my doctor and that he is gay because I will be damned if Gabriel finds out that my OB was a guy.

I also meet Victo-I mean Doctor Cherry, his assistant/ substitute doctor for his patients in case he wasn't there. She looks awfully familiar to me that I am feeling a bit dodgy at her, remembering that Victoria Lint who made my life hell before and after I have married Gabriel.

She has the same facial features as that of Victoria, Gabe's ex-girlfriend except that Cherry is blonde while Victoria was brunette. The features end with that because they have no traits in common like Cherry's attitude is kind, nice and loving; nothing like those of that scandalous bitch, whom I fought with before I and Gabriel got married. She's so scanty and ridiculous that even though it has been a year I can't forget about her freak face and her foul mouth which I long to wash with soap.

Victoria's face still irks me making me want to find her and pull her head off, screaming bloody murder. Why does Cherry have to look like someone I hated for the rest of eternity? I'm pretty sure that God can choose from a lot of combinations so why do they have to look a lot like each other? And the fact that Cherry is so nice to me that she already win my heart makes it more infuriating. She even assured me that I am her favourite patient and that she will take care of me and my baby.

After giving me my prenatal vitamins, Eric asked me to come back next month to check on this little bean. He also gave me his number, telling me that I'm free to consult him anytime, or asked him about the different stages of pregnancy. He also told me that throwing up or morning sickness is just normal, along with the sudden cravings that are so bizarre, not fathomable by anyone but the baby inside.

After my check-up, Neola and I went to the nearest grocery store to buy the ingredients for the Chicken Alfredo which is Gabriel's favourite. I am looking forward to this dinner because I haven't seen him for weeks and I wanted to tell him about the baby, explaining to him that he will be the best father because I will be next to him, figuring parenthood together.

Even if I feel like I'm gonna sleep for the rest of my life as soon as I hit the sack yet, I still waited. I'm so beat which explains why I am so eager to sleep. It's past eleven in the evening now and there's not even a sign on when he's going to arrive. No message or call to tell me that he'd cancel his flight back to New York because he still had some unfinished business meeting or anything. He just made me wait. He made me think that he will be here with me tonight, celebrating his arrival and also the present inside me.

Darn it! I really miss him.

I can't help the tears as they fall down on my cheek. Can't he see that I long for his presence? Don't he miss me too? He's focused on making our relationship work from the moment he stayed with me all day after our anniversary. He's shown me that he wanted me, that he can still be human, that I can be loved by him but, as he leaves for Italy, I know it will change again.

I stopped pacing around the kitchen, settling myself back on the seat and staring at the dish I have prepared. A lot of thoughts clouding my mind again as I felt my eyes being clouded by the tears, and they fell against my cheek, hot and swift. I cried my heart out and plead for him to come home to me because I felt like everything was a repeat of that tragic night and once he came back here from Italy, we are broken again and I will be left picking up my personal pieces. I can't help but sob harder as I lay my head down on the table, wallowing.

I'm tired and hungry. I think I cannot wait some more for the smell of Chicken Alfredo is making me drool like I haven't eaten from the past twenty-five years of my existence. I have to take a bite out of it at least

After finishing a plate full of pasta, I keep the leftovers in the fridge so if he ever arrives later at dawn and is hungry, he can feed his foul mouth. I silently wash my plate since we've got no household help for I like to do things on my own. As I wipe the plate, I thought about the possibility of him having an affair.

Maybe, that is possible.

He's always been known to have so many mistresses, models here and there. It is only when his father have arranged a marriage for the two of us when he settled down. I always have doubts but he always tried to push it off my mind and gave me a satisfying relationship. Satisfying to the extent of him putting a distance between us and shutting himself in his office while letting me do what I want to do.

He told me that he will change but it seems like it's all a lie. And now, with the business running in his hand again, he's having nights out where he stayed up late, never giving me the chance to spend time with him. Even on weekends he always has something to do a sorry excuse for him to not go home.

I wish I didn't hold unto his empty promises.

I stripped off my clothes and headed inside the bathroom. I remember that night - the night when he came home after the party, drunk out of his mind. I lured him in and let him kiss me. I let him drive me crazy with lust for the desperation in my heart is winning and unexpectedly he reacted to it the same way as I did. He completely blew my head off and took my heart with him.

I have always wanted a kid right from the moment we married for the baby is the only thing that will make me happy when he's away - a substitute for his very presence. This little snot will look just like him and I'm very sure of that considering that I am missing the devil more and more.

I caress my tummy and smiled, "Hello there, little Bean. I'm your mommy. I love you, always remember that..." I gaze at my reflection in the mirror and smiled.

Who knows I can be pregnant without him knowing it?

Well, not for long at least.

계속

©S A F I E

CHAPTER 6

ELLE

I was bored like crazy.

I lied down on the floor, my thoughts and emotions in a turmoil. I really miss him and the way my hormones raged on, doesn't help me at all. I pulled at my hair and turn so that I am facing the balcony, the view of the beautiful Sunday morning trying to cheer me up but failing. I push myself up so that I am sitting.

I've been in my studio for quite an hour now since I woke up, eating my cheerios with Nutella as I stare at the empty canvas. I couldn't seem to find the inspiration to paint or focus or even be creative.

All because I miss him.

He is still not here. He has promised to be back last night but it was one of his funny schemes, a prank as I like to call it. he loves playing with my feelings and I don't understand the reason behind it. I thought he will be true to his words but he did not even care to explain to me. He's on the other side of the world doing God knows what; left me here floating and cold. He didn't even bother to send me a text or even call me or send Taylor to my aid.

I did try to call him a few times and it just directed me to his voicemail with his very sexy voice saying: 'Gabriel West. I am quite busy at the moment, please leave a message'.

It's quite disappointing that my effort in preparing a dish for him last night is wasted. He didn't even bother to make time for a call and tell me a sorry excuse, better than ignoring me and receiving no reply from him at all.

With pure and utter disappointment, I push myself off the floor and covered my canvas with some cloth. Strutting out of the room, I was surprised when the phone buzz on my pocket. I pulled it out in an instant expecting that it was Gabe but I was mistaken.

It's Neola.

'Hey, are u free?' I raised an eyebrow at her words.

'Yes, Y?' I typed back as I descend the stairs. It didn't take long before the phone buzz back in my pocket and I take it out to unlock it.

'I'm heading over to your house'. My eyes almost bulge out of their sockets as I read her message. I recover after a minute, typing back, 'Seriously, like right now?!'

'Yep ;) '

I didn't even have the chance to finish descending the stairs when the doorbell rings. I hastily made my way down to the threshold and yank the door open, startled when I was knocked over by the female version of my husband.

They look the same; Same blue eyes, perky nose, stubborn chin and auburn hair, though her features are much softer than that of my husband.

"Neola!" I shrieked as she tightens her hug, "I can't--breathe" I stated, trying to push her off me. She hugs like a boa constrictor, I'm finding it hard to stay on my feet while she holds unto me like that.

"Oh, sorry..." She smiled at me, tucking her hair on the back of her ear as she blushes in embarrassment.

I gave her an accusing look, "Can you please remind me again why you are here? I don't recall you stating that you'll come barging in early this morning. And also, you told me that you have a lot to do...Tailor for Bethany, pass your new gown design to Carle, deliver the flowers - am I correct?" I asked, putting my hands on my hips, enjoying that she was looking a little bit more nervous than she did when she just arrived.

"You're right but, hey! Quit acting like my mother, Elle." She pulls my hand off my hips and kisses my cheek, knowing exactly what she should do. The cheeky girl. "I'm here to check on you as requested by...by my brother." She nodded her head as though she is reassuring herself, not really talking to me as she cast her eyes down on the floor, a vacant look on her eyes. She bites her lip and shrugs a shoulder as she stares at me. "I'm sorry, Elle. He put me to it."

"So, you're my babysitter now? I thought you promise me that you'll only serve me yesterday because you are not doing anything; because you are bored-or I didn't know better until now." I trained my eyes at her as she bites her lips, her cheeks now red of embarrassment.

Looking up at me behind her eyelashes, I pointed an accusing finger at her. "Did you accompany me yesterday because it is an order from your brother?" She sighs once again, holding her hands up as she stands there, guilt plastered on her face.

"It is. But hey...I also wanted to catch up with you. It's not like I got many chances to spend time with you because I just arrived from London a week ago. The last time I saw you were at your wedding which is a year ago- and yesterday at the café of course-but it doesn't make up with the lost time. I consider you my sister now which made me quite guilty for not exerting much effort of spending time with you." She huffed, shrugging her shoulders, " I didn't even get to celebrate with you on your first anniversary, no proper gift or anything." She said, her voice breaking as she continues to bite her lip.

"Forgive me if I allow myself to be used by my brother. He ordered me around like his employee but, believe me: This is the first time that he asks a favour from me. I swear. It was rare, like a raindrop on the desert and for this time, he did ask me to take you out, just so you won't be alone..."

"So he thought about these things now? Not a week ago? Or maybe two days after he left? He doesn't even message or call me, Neo. What is it with him and his secrets." I was startled when she guided me in the living room and have me sit on a couch. I gave her a sigh, and she smiles, "Okay. I'll let you past because you confessed the truth. That blasted brother of yours, you wait until he gets back here. I'll give him a piece of my mind."

"Hey! You are stressing out again. Don't do this to yourself, please. It's really bad for you and the baby..."

"God, the baby! Does he know about the baby?" Neola stared at me and held her hands up, her expression surprised. "Nope. Not my place to break the news to him. It's up to you to tell him." I breathe a sigh of relief and unknowingly, my hand move down on their own accord, caressing my tummy.

I muttered a 'thank you' and we just sat there- looking at the television which is not even turned on. It was only when her phone rang that she suddenly turn to me again and smiled, "Now, it's time to start our day out. Come, Ryan is already waiting." She stands and offered me her hand.

"Who is Ryan? Is he your boyfriend?" She pulled me up the couch, hiding her face as she blushes, her eyes wipe, "Nope! He.is.not. He is Joe's nephew, in case you didn't know." she stated, her face still red as she opens the door for me.

"Wait, who the hell is Joe?!"

Now I'm confused.

Neola rolled her eyes as we walk down the driveway, her boots clicking as she walks beside me. I look down at my simple white shirt and faded jeans, feeling a little bit underdress as I stand next to Neola - I should've asked a couple of minutes so I can dress up and pull on something nicer than my normal clothes.

"That's Taylor's first name. Taylor is simply their surname," Neola said to me as she signals to the classy guy who is holding out the door for us to a sleek black limo.

So, should I now call Taylor as Joe?

"DOLLAR, DOLLAR, baby!" Neola screams as she got inside, flashing me a smirk that is very much like my husband's.

•

I am glad to be out of the house, out of the claws of the city that never sleeps. We are going to spend the day out away from all these, just like Neo stated it.

As for Ryan Taylor, he is a silent guy. Barely speaking, barely moving aside from the fact that he needs to ask Neo, occasionally, about where we are going to go. He's tall like Joe but not as bulky as him. Ryan is thin, only slightly build and also, he wears eyeglasses. He almost looks like that guy from Harry Potter

I jerked from my seat when the limo stopped in front of a shop. Ryan opened the door for us as Neo stepped out, ushering me so that she was leading me to enter the shop. It was small and has cream painted walls but the fact that it was littered with their products made it almost impossible for me to see the real wall. Against the cramped surrounding, I couldn't help but smile. It was warm and cosy and really felt homey inside.

The shop sells different kinds of jewellery, furniture, clothes. Anything that is antique and is fairly beautiful in the human eyes. It was like a shrine of objects that once was dear to their owners but have lost its charm, making it end up in this place. I glance around, thrilled by the different artworks I am seeing - the owner must have a keen eye to collect such bizarre things. There are so many of them that captured my attention: body shaped vases, glass-blown flowers, cherubim with colourful wings and dozens of trinkets.

I am enthralled by the different accessories that sat on the velvet cases. I draw near it and gasp as I see what is inside. One is a simple leather bracelet with an engraved drawing of wings which can actually be split. One is larger as the other was smaller. It reminds me of Gabe and also the little bean inside of me. It will be perfect for them. I smiled and proceed to pay for it though after paying, another thing caught my attention, which is a flute.

I stared at it for a while losing myself in a memory that has once hunted my dreams.

*Flashback *

“Papa, play my song. Play it, please!" I scream at the man who is sat by the piano. His face hidden by a shadow as his hands expertly glided through the keys. The notes form into a rhythm until a melody was made and soon, another tune pipe in. It was thinner and soft - almost encouraging me to dance the lessons I learnt from ballet.

I look up to see a boy smiling down at me, his eyes green like mine though he has blonde hair. He places the metallic tube on his lips and blows through the hole again, accompanying the sound made by the piano as I dance around the room, the ceiling so high up that I wonder why the clouds are not on it yet.

I was once a naive five-year-old who only knows about the simple things in life such as ice creams tasted better when they are cold and never to question your mistress when she teaches ballet.

I can feel a smile tugging at my lips as the melody made me twirl and I landed down on my legs, perfecting a split. There's a cheer coming from the man and the boy that has the same features as me. we had a lot of fun not until we were interrupted by a voice...

"Jacob dear, come down now; Ela fetch your brother. Dinner is ready!"

* end of flashback *

I was startled when someone touches my elbow and in a moment, I was back at the situation at hand. "Are you okay, miss ?" The very healthy woman beside me asked as she held unto my elbow. I touched my forehead and felt the dizzy spell leaving me. I was glad that she held me or else I already have collapsed.

Why did I have that flashback? Is it because of the flute?

I haven't had any flashbacks since I was six. I don't really know when it did stop. Right after I was taken by the Greene's my life has drastically changed; I get lesser nightmares, good grooming and the best foods I can ever taste. I'm just thankful that my nightmares had stopped or I will still be buried in my misery which I cannot really remember the reason behind. The Greene's have chosen not to tell me about my past and I haven't really dwell on it much because I already have a good life, but as I turn to look at the flute, I realize that my past is yet to be unravelled. It has to.

I turn my head down and wipe my forehead, breathing through my nose so I won't puke.

I was about to answer the woman when Neo pokes her head out of one of the shelf, a couple of books tightly clutch in her hands as she smiled, "There you are! I thought you are already swallowed by the spirit in that vase..." she stated pointing at the vase beside me when she recognizes the healthy woman holding me by the arm "Oh! Hey there, Genova."

"Neola - mica! So, she was the girl you are talking about...the one that your brother had married." Genova released my arm as she began to inspect my face, giving me a yellow smile, showing all her teeth, "I apologize I didn't even recognize you, maybe it's because of that unfamiliar glow. You're very pale when I saw you at your wedding. But now look at you, you're very beautiful." She pinched my cheek which made me blush, embarrassed of getting such appraisal from someone I am not even familiar with. "You're pregnant, am I right?" She stated, looking at me in the eye.

"How-" I answered only to be interrupted by her as she paces around me, her fingers touching my cheek lightly

"Girl, I know it. All women can see that by just looking at you. I doubt that your man won't be prouder than he already is. Maybe he's already bragging about you pregnant and--"

"Actually, Genova...I'm going to get some lunch now. Elle here was so hungry that's why she kind of slips from our world to hers, so if you'll excuse us. I'll just see you tomorrow at the wedding. Don't worry, I'm going to bring the kit you requested from me and it is of free charge. your welcome!" Neo stated, not giving any chance for Genova to interrupt her as she pulled me out of the shop.

I am thankful that I can control myself enough to hold the tears for a minute before the door closes us in the limo. I sob at Neo's shoulder as the tears flow. I don't know why I'm crying. Is it because Gabe doesn't know about the baby growing inside my womb or about the flashback I don't expect I would have by just looking at the flute?

Thinking about the incident alone made me dizzy.

We pulled up in front of an Italian restaurant and Neo ordered for us while I wait in the car. She decided that a take out would be a better choice considering the situation I have. Ryan drove us back to Fairfield, back to the manor. He was silent, not even looking at me and I am glad for he didn't ask the reason why I am acting like a crybaby.

I opened the door to the manor, delighted because now, I feel safe. I'm inside the comfort of Gabe's compound even though he's not here. I remain standing by the threshold while Neola darted up the stairs to retrieve whatever she needed. Ryan moves silently, carrying our take-outs inside the living room just as Neola told him.

I was suddenly pulled, Neola leads me to one of the sofas and pushed me down it. She sets the pillow and the blanket on the couch and searches through the rack of movies besides the speaker holding out a couple of movies I can choose with. Wanting to cheer us up, I pick, legally blonde's and watch Neo roll her eyes at me.

Ryan opens the box and leaves us to it, disappearing by the kitchen. I happily popped some pizza inside my mouth and my stomach cheered as it receives some of the pasta. "You liked it! Must be the Italian side of you." I whispered down at my tummy before I eat again. Neola occasionally snorted as she tried to hold her laugh in, making me laugh harder.

After finishing the movie, she chooses another one, and another until I doze off.

I am not sure but I can swear on a couple of Tenners that I heard her say goodbye to me as I drift off to sleep. But the most heart-stopping moment here is that I felt Gabe's presence in the room as soon as Neo left.

I can smell his cologne and as his hands touched my bare shoulder, making me shiver. I peek through my eyelashes and felt his head brush my cheeks before he kissed my forehead, his lips lingering on top of it. Then, he did the most unexpected thing I never thought he would do - He carried me up from the couch and to the stairs, leading us back to my room.

He laid me down the bed and after a while, my side dipped as he lies down next to me, stretching his limbs before he collected me on his arms. I am afraid to move but I should not be stiff enough to make him suspicious, finding out that I am not really asleep. I breathe in his scent and let out a breath, thankful that he is here, next to me, cuddling me in just like how I have yearned for years. But then these feelings are short-lived because now, I do not know how I'm going to say to him that I'm pregnant with his child and that it is not a prank.

Whether he would believe me or not, it is up to him but one thing is for sure - I can give him the proof sooner than later.

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