2: 2
I slept for two days straight in my little apartment.
My mother called on the third day.
"Dot, have you and Merlin made up?"
"No."
"Why are you so stubborn? Your dad and I already said it's fine. What are you still making a fuss about?"
There was an edge of worry in her voice.
"Merlin came all the way to the house, loaded down with bags and bags of gifts, apologizing over and over."
"He says he knows he was wrong, and he wants you to stop being angry."
I gripped the phone.
"Mom, did you take the gifts?"
"No. Your dad wouldn't let me. But the boy had a good attitude. I think he really is sorry."
"Stop being so stubborn with him and come home."
I drew a deep breath.
"Mom, stay out of this one."
"How can I stay out of it? This is about the rest of your life!"
"I've already decided."
I looked out the window and hung up.
I knew exactly how Merlin operated.
If he couldn't handle me, he'd go work on my parents.
He knew they were soft-hearted, and he knew how much they valued this match.
Sure enough, less than ten minutes later, an unknown number called.
I didn't pick up.
The caller wouldn't give up, ringing again and again.
Finally, sick of it, I answered.
"Dorothy, your mother said you weren't home."
Merlin's voice sounded tired.
"Where I am is none of your business."
"Can you please just stop this?"
He softened his tone.
"I handled that day badly. I admit it."
"I apologized to you, and I apologized to your parents."
"What exactly do you want?"
What did I want.
I thought of my mother's soaked clothes, my father limping along.
I thought of the tissue he handed his assistant, Leonora.
"Merlin, I don't want anything."
"I just think we're not right for each other."
"Not right for each other?"
He gave a short laugh, as if the idea were absurd.
"We've been together two years, and now you tell me we're not right for each other?"
"Dorothy, do you think I can't live without you?"
I said nothing.
"Let me tell you, there are plenty of women who'd want to marry me. Don't throw kindness back in my face."
His patience had run out, and the real face showed through.
"Then go find them."
I hung up.
At last, the world was quiet.
I changed my number and found a new job at a small design firm.
A new life began, busy and full.
Merlin and I, I thought that was where our story ended.
A month later I went with a new coworker to an industry cocktail party.
I saw Merlin at the door.
He'd gotten thinner. In a well-cut suit, he was still the center of the room.
A woman stood beside him. Not Leonora.
Someone I didn't know, her makeup flawless, her smile sweet.
Standing together, they looked well matched.
I lowered my head and tried to slip past.
"Dorothy?"
He'd seen me anyway.
I stopped and looked up.
The woman beside him studied me with curiosity.
"Long time no see."
I forced out a smile.
Merlin's expression was hard to read. He looked at me, then at the young man beside me, my new coworker, a guy named Frank James.
"And this is?"
"My coworker, Frank."
Frank gave him a polite nod.
Merlin ignored it. His eyes came back to me.
"You changed jobs?"
"Yes."
"Changed your number too?"
"Yes."
"Dorothy, you really are cold, aren't you."
He bit off each word.
I didn't want to get tangled up with him in front of everyone.
"We're going in now."
I took Frank's arm to leave.
"Wait."
He put out a hand to block me.
The woman beside him didn't look pleased and tugged at his sleeve.
"Merlin."
He didn't move, his eyes locked on me.
"Are you with him now?"
He pointed at Frank.
Frank frowned.
"Sir, please show some respect."
Merlin gave a cold laugh.
"What? I say a few words to my ex-girlfriend and you have to step in?"
He leaned hard on those two words, ex-girlfriend.
I shook off his hand.
"Merlin, what exactly do you want?"
"I just want to ask. You found a replacement this fast?"
"Is that all your affection was worth? That cheap?"
People around us were already watching.
I didn't want to make a scene.
"Who I like, who I'm with, none of it has anything to do with you."
"We already broke up."
I pulled Frank around him and walked quickly into the party.
Behind me came his voice, low and strained.
"Dorothy, you'll regret this."
3: 3
The party was dull.
Frank and I stood in a corner, drinking juice.
"That guy just now, was that your ex?"
Frank asked.
"Yeah."
"He looks like he still hasn't gotten over you."
I shook my head.
"It's not me he can't get over. It's his pride."
Merlin was the kind of man used to controlling everything.
My leaving without a word felt like a challenge to him.
He didn't want me back. He just wanted to drag me back, to prove that he'd won.
My phone rang, right as I was thinking it.
An unfamiliar local number.
I hesitated, then answered anyway.
"Hello?"
"Is this Miss Dickerson? This is the emergency room at the city hospital."
Something in me went tight.
"Yes, this is she. What's wrong?"
"There's a Mr. Delgado here. He drank too much and had a stomach hemorrhage. He's in emergency care right now."
"You're the emergency contact in his phone."
A wave of dizziness went through my head.
Frank saw the look on my face.
"What's wrong?"
"My... my ex is in the hospital."
"Is it serious?"
"Stomach hemorrhage. They're working on him."
Frank picked up my bag.
"Come on, I'll take you."
My hands stayed cold the whole way to the hospital.
I hated Merlin, hated his coldness, hated his arrogance.
But I'd never imagined anything happening to him.
The surgery light was still on when we got to the emergency room.
A man in a suit came over. Merlin's friend, Miles Simmons.
"So you're Dorothy?"
He looked me up and down.
"You finally showed up."
"How is Merlin?"
"Still in there. Doctor says it's not too bad, just lost a lot of blood."
Miles sighed.
"I mean, come on. It was just a breakup. Did you have to hide like that?"
"Merlin's spent the whole month searching for you like a man gone mad."
"Then tonight he sees you at the party with some other guy, it set him off, and he drank a whole bottle of whiskey by himself."
I said nothing.
"Dorothy, I know what Merlin did that day was wrong. But he's not an unreasonable man."
"Just give him a way out, and this whole thing blows over, doesn't it?"
"Do you really have to push it this far?"
My head was a mess. I stared at the red light over the surgery door.
After a while, the door opened.
The doctor came out.
"Which of you is family?"
"I'm his friend."
Miles said.
"The patient is out of danger, but he needs to stay for observation."
Merlin was wheeled out, face pale, eyes closed, still unconscious.
I looked at that bloodless face, and I couldn't name what I felt.
Miles went to handle the admission paperwork and told me to watch Merlin for a bit.
Frank stood with me for a while.
"Maybe I should head back. You stay here and take care of him."
"Okay. Thank you for today."
"Don't mention it."
Frank left, and it was just me and Merlin in the room.
I sat in the chair beside the bed and watched him.
His brow was drawn tight, restless even in sleep.
I looked at his face and sighed inside, and in the end my hand stayed where it was.
There was no going back for us.
I don't know how long it was before he woke.
He blinked, then opened his eyes and saw me.
"You... you came."
His voice was hoarse.
"Yeah."
"I thought you wouldn't."
He gave a bitter little laugh that pulled at the wound, and he hissed with pain.
I stood up and poured him a cup of water.
He didn't take it.
"Dorothy, let's... let's make up."
He looked at me, a trace of pleading in his eyes.
Two years of knowing him, and it was the first time I'd ever seen that look on his face.
"Merlin, we're over."
"Why?"
His voice rose, agitated.
"Because I didn't help your mom up? Because I didn't comfort your dad?"
"That's nothing, Dorothy, that's all such small stuff!"
"To me, it isn't small."
I set the cup down on the nightstand.
"Those are my parents. They can choose not to care, but I have to."
"They're what matters most to me. The thing you think is nothing."
His eyes reddened.
"I know I was wrong. I really do."
"Give me one more chance, can't you?"
I looked at him, and inside I was completely calm.
"Merlin, it's too late."
"It was already too late the moment you handed Leonora a tissue instead of helping my mom up."
I turned to leave.
"Dorothy!"
He struggled up from the bed and grabbed my wrist.
"Don't go!"
His grip was strong, and it hurt.
"Let go of me!"
"I won't!"
He stared at me, stubborn.
"Not unless you promise you won't leave."
Right then, the door to the room swung open.
Merlin's mother walked in, the woman from the party trailing behind her.
The instant she saw us pulling at each other, Sarah Delgado's face went dark.
"What do you two think you're doing!"
4: 4
Sarah Delgado flung my hand off and strode over.
"Dorothy, what are you still doing here, harassing my son?"
She shoved me aside and checked over Merlin, tense.
"Merlin, how are you? Has the wound torn open?"
The other woman came over too, carrying a bowl of soup.
"Merlin, I made you some soup. Have a little."
Merlin ignored them both. His eyes stayed on me.
"Mom, don't do this."
"Don't do what?"
Sarah glared at me.
"If it weren't for you, would my son be lying here?"
"When people break up, they act like it. Instead you run all the way to the hospital. What are you after? A chance to watch him suffer?"
Her tirade left me a little dazed.
"Ma'am, it wasn't me—"
"Shut your mouth!"
She cut me off.
"A woman like you isn't welcome in the Delgado family."
"Back then, if I hadn't thought you were at least decent, I never would have agreed to the two of you being together."
"Clearly, I misjudged you."
The woman beside her poured on more.
"Ma'am, please don't be angry. Miss Dickerson was probably just worried about Merlin too."
She turned to me with an innocent face.
"Miss Dickerson, I know you and Merlin had something good once. But the one at his side now is me."
"So let us have this, all right?"
It struck me as absurd, watching the two of them play off each other like a duet.
I looked at Merlin, wanting to see how he'd react.
His brows were drawn tight, like he wanted to say something.
But his mother got there first.
"Did you hear me? Leave, now!"
"And don't let me see you again!"
I drew a deep breath and nodded.
"Fine."
Without a shred of reluctance, I turned around.
At the door, Merlin's voice came from behind me, weak and desperate.
"Dorothy, stop right there!"
I didn't stop.
"Mom! Why are you making her leave?"
"If I don't make her leave, do I keep her here to keep ruining you?"
"Get back here!"
There was a sob threading through Merlin's voice.
I pulled the door open and walked out.
Miles was leaning against the wall, his expression complicated.
"Dorothy, she's just too worried about Merlin. Don't take it to heart."
I didn't look at him.
"Do me a favor. Don't use his phone to call me anymore."
"He and I have nothing to do with each other now."
And with that I walked off without looking back.
Home, I threw myself down on the couch.
My head was a mess.
Merlin's pleading, his mother's insults, that woman's provocation.
All of it seemed so ridiculous.
I thought I'd already let go. So why did it still hurt?
My phone rang. It was Frank.
"You okay? Back from the hospital?"
"Yeah, I'm back."
"Is he all right?"
"He's fine."
There was silence on the other end for a moment.
"Dorothy, you don't sound good."
"How about I come over and keep you company?"
"No need. I just want to be alone for a while."
"All right. Remember to eat something."
I stared at the ceiling and hung up.
The tears fell without warning.
I wasn't crying over Merlin.
I felt it was all for nothing—two years of everything I'd given.