Amelia

“Suicide? No fucking way. You’re wrong. So wrong.”

With his beer halfway to his mouth, Lucien narrowed his eyes and stared at me. “Shut up.”

“No, I’m sorry. I can’t do that. Parker wouldn’t commit suicide. He wouldn’t…he wouldn’t leave me.” Tears rose in my eyes, but I struggled to hold them back.

I was weak in almost every single way that mattered, but I couldn’t be weak now. One person had shown me some decency in my life. He’d been drunk, abrasive, and incredibly offensive at times, but he’d respected me.

I would not let his death be written off as suicide. I just couldn’t.

“And here I was thinking that Parker killed himself because of you,” Lucien said harshly.

“That I put him in charge of a woman I should have killed years ago, and in doing so, I stripped him of ,all his friends and family. He killed himself because he had nothing but you.”

If he was aiming to hurt me, his aim was dead-on, but I didn’t back down. “Parker told me that his son had been away for years before I came here, so you can’t pin that on me. And we both know that Parker didn’t have friends. What makes you think he killed himself?”

“Because he put a gun to his head and left a note.”

My hands started to shake, so I clasped them behind my back. “And what did the note say?”

“Wondering if he killed himself because of you, my dear?” With a smirk, he drained his beer and stood. “I’m here to promote Paul. He’s your new manager, and as you call it, your new babysitter.”

Bile rose in my throat. Of course Paul was the new manager.

“I quit.”

Lucien cocked his head. “No.”

“You can’t keep me here against my will.”

“I can, Amelia. Did you think this was a job? This is your prison, my dear. You leave when I say you leave. Do what you’re told, and maybe it’ll be another three years before I see you.”

I could run. I didn’t know much about the clan politics or the local packs. They were all independent of each other.

The king exiled Shadowed Moon Mountains a long time ago. There was no higher authority than the alphas, but they controlled nothing out of their own territories. I could blend in with the pack-less rogues. I knew these mountains like the back of my hand.

It wasn’t the first time I’d considered running and picking my life up as a rogue. I might not make it more than a few years before another wolf ended my life, but it would be a few years of freedom. That was all I wanted.

“If you run, Amelia, I will find you, and I will make sure that where I put you next will make this place look like a castle.”

Lucien and Jenson stopped and headed for the door. Helplessly, I watched them go.

“You don’t understand. You don’t know the things Paul will do to me,” I called after them.

My mate didn’t even look over his shoulder. “I do.”

Amelia

“You have to learn to trust me at some point.”

The whisper in my ear heated my skin, and I tried not to wiggle against the body pressed to mine. I didn’t understand what he wanted.

“You. I want you.”

And he could always read my thoughts. Damn irritating.

His low chuckle filled the darkness as his hand slid over my belly. I was naked. I was always naked, floating in the nothingness, and he was always here.

A dream. Just a dream, except I wasn’t asleep. Not always. Not this time.

“It’s hard to see you and not touch you. To see you and know that you won’t let me hold you.”

Let him? Nobody let Lucien do anything. If he wanted to hold me, he would.

And that’s how I knew it wasn’t real. This was just the mate I wanted. The hero. The one who would listen and understand.

That was not the real Lucien West.

“Are you wet, baby? Let me see.”

I never stopped him. Never wanted to stop him. My body never reacted this way to anyone, and what was the harm? Instead, I turned toward him, threw my thighs across his hip while his cock settled right against my wet pussy. He was always just as naked as I was.

“Always wet for me,” he growled. “Mine. You’re mine, Amelia. I won’t let anyone else have you.”

“You’re nothing more than a fantasy. A dream. You’re not real,” I told him with a small moan as his hands raked down my body and pressed between my legs. “You’re just a way to drive myself to madness.”

“You’re the one making me insane. You won’t talk to me. Won’t let me in. All you’ll ever let me do is this.”

Grabbing my hips, he twisted onto his back, taking me with him until I fell over his chest.

In that moment, like every time, I thought of pushing him away. It wasn’t healthy to fantasize about him like this. It wasn’t real. It would never be real.

But I didn’t stop. Ever. Glutton for punishment. That’s me. And when I settled on his cock, I moaned just a little as I tried to make room for this thick length. His grunt just made me more slippery as I wiggled.

“Fuck, Amelia. You always gotta tease.”

“Not teasing. Just…uh…just figuring out what I like.”

It wasn’t like I had a ton of experience. Or any experience. Mated three years and still a virgin. But I had this. This fantasy that wasn’t real.

“Do you like this? Do you like it when I fuck you, Amelia?”

He knew that I did, so I just growled at him and shifted my position so I could take him in a little deeper. He let me play for a few minutes while pleasure coursed through me, but then he grabbed my hips and took control.

Helpless. I was always helpless in his hands, but I always felt safe.

Another way that I knew it wasn’t real.

Lucien West was not someone who was safe. Not for me.

But that didn’t stop me from screaming out his name as he fucked me into oblivion.

I was not in my bed.

Blinking, I stared down at the rag in my hand and realized I’d completely lost myself in one of those stupid dreams, and I wasn’t even in my bed.

Or in my apartment.

The bar was empty. We’d been shut down for two hours. Normally, by now, I was curled up in my bed with a book, but I hadn’t cracked open a book in three weeks.

Not since Lucien made Paul the manager. Now, like every night, I’d been given a ridiculous cleaning task that always took at least two hours. Tonight, I was oiling the baseboards.

All of them.

Never mind that we had buffer tools to handle this or even that the baseboards really needed a new coat of paint. No, Paul had decided that the place was far too filthy and needed a good shine.

And I was just the girl to do it.

I ached from my head to my toes. Paul hadn’t given me a single day off. The first time I refused to come down, he’d broken into my apartment and hauled me down to the bar himself.

I’d been wearing nothing but a T-shirt and a pair of panties, and that was how he made me work. And whenever there weren’t any customers in the bar, the employees would find ways to entertain themselves.

My bruises had bruises.

They had two goals. One was to make me cry. I’d come damn close when they’d taken the poker to the grill coals and scarred my legs.

The second was to see my wolf.

I hadn’t shifted once since my father was killed. Not when Lucien demanded it so he could identify my wolf. Not when Parker pleaded that it would help me heal.

Now everyone wanted to see if pain would let her out.

I would die before I let any of these assholes get their hands on her.