I was disgusted by the sight of how smug Zelda and her son looked.

At this point, I was done with seeing them affectionate with each other. Besides, I was still worried about Ava, who was at home.

When I got back home again, Ava was still next to my body. Her eyes were red like she had just cried. She even brought her favorite bunny plushie to my side. The bunny was made of cheap material that caught dust, and I had always forbade her from sleeping with it because of hygiene concerns.

To convince her to give it to me, I would tell her that I liked the bunny too so that she would hand it over. It was usually not very effective. She would cry and throw a round of tantrums before finally relenting.

And now, she lifted my arm that had turned stiff and stuffed her most precious bunny into my hands.

She then murmured, “Mommy, you can have Bunny. I don’t want it anymore. Please don’t be angry at me.”

She then wrapped herself around my arms. “Mommy, you can sleep with Bunny. Will you forgive me after you wake up?”

I could feel my tears fall and vanish in the air. My silly, darling daughter assumed that I was only sleeping because I was upset with her. Why would I ever be upset with her?

I regretted marrying and relocating so far away from home. I also regretted all the times I forgave Eliott.

However, I never regretted giving birth to Ava. She was the light of my life, the only consolation during my roughest days. Without Ava, there would not be anything worth holding onto in this world.

I wanted to reach for her and take her into my arms. However, my phantom arms merely phased through her body, and she could not feel my touch.

When I was alive, I could feel her warmth just by reaching out. Now, I could no longer touch her.

She finally fell asleep leaning against me.

It was autumn and the nights were colder than usual. At one point, she startled herself awake with a sneeze. Her nose was red, and I could tell that she was falling sick.

Despite that, she ignored the discomfort. Her first thought was to inspect me.

Bunny slipped from my hands and dropped to the floor. She burst into tears when she saw the plushie that was just as lifeless as me drop onto the floor.

Then, she began to shake me while dribbling snot, “Mommy, even if you don’t want me anymore, why don’t you want Bunny?”

At this point, she must have realized that something was wrong with me. She reached forward and touched me on my forehead. “Mommy, you must be sick too. I know you’re not ignoring me. When I was sick, you always stayed by my side to take care of me. Now, it’s my turn to take care of you.”

With that, she tried to drag my body back to the bedroom. She must have thought I would be able to get better rest in the bed rather than on the couch. It was the best way for me to recover.

However, she was too weak to manage the hefty task. She had not had anything to eat for an entire day and had to give up after several tries. From her abnormally flushed cheeks, I could tell she was beginning to develop a fever.

I anxiously circled in the air and begged her to call her father. I had taught her to call her father if she was ever in trouble.

Perhaps she heard my cry or not, but either way, she suddenly ran to get the phone.

“I’m sorry for being useless, Mommy. I’ll call Daddy to help.”

I heaved a sigh of relief. Great, as long as Eliott would come home. Everything would be fine. He may hate me, but surely he would not abandon his birth daughter.

Ava dialed the number she had memorized, but the call disconnected on the second ring.

I could feel my heart drop right then and there. In the past, I would have been very upset, but now, all I did was plead and pray that Eliott would answer the call.

Ava did not give up and dialed again.

After a wait that seemed like forever, the call finally connected.

Eliott impatiently grumbled into the phone, “Anne, what is your problem? Shouldn’t you know that I’m busy?”

“Daddy, it’s me.”

Upon hearing Ava's voice, Eliott's tone softened immediately. “Ava, why are you calling me? Where's Mommy?”

Ava nervously clasped her fingers around the phone, “Mommy is sleeping. I am sick and I can’t carry Mommy to the bedroom. Can you do it, Daddy?”

Eliott fell silent for what felt like forever. It sounded like he was trying to control himself from bursting out. At last, he stated as calmly as possible, “Give Mommy the phone.”

Ava put the phone to my ear and told him, “Mommy’s here.”

Now that Ava was out of earshot, Eliott’s tone became sharp and aggressive again.

“Anne, what is the meaning of this? Are you trying to use Ava to gain my sympathy? She’s just a girl. Don’t you dare bring her into this mess! I will not be coming home for a while, so you should take the time to reflect. I’ll only come home once you realize what you have done.”

With that, he hung up and left the desolate drone of the phone buzzing in my ears. Considering how quickly he hung up on me, he must not have had the patience to listen to my explanation.

I looked at Ava, whose temperature seemed to be rising, and began to feel anxious. If only I could come back to life again. I wanted to take her pain away.

When I married Eliott, he did not tell me anything about Zelda.

I was seduced by the sweet nothings he said to me and ended up moving thousands of miles away to be with him despite my parents' objection. I had bet it all on him. I trusted that he was a good man, a sincere man.

When Zelda divorced her ex-husband and returned to him with her child, I knew I had lost the gamble. I was not someone prone to dramatics. I could handle having some turbulence in my marriage.

Over the years, I have had a fair share of arguments with Eliott, but it was usually over trivial subjects. Our life together was otherwise peaceful. There was nothing that could not be resolved with a proper conversation.

I had assumed it would be the same this time. I trusted him and gave him a chance to explain himself.

Despite his questionable behavior, I only voiced my protest with minor complaints. I told him to prioritize our family and to keep his distance from Zelda and her son.

It ended up setting him off. He accused me of being petty, jealous, and of suspecting him.

He even insulted me, “Don’t even think about comparing yourself to someone like Zelda. Don’t project your problems on others.”

Again and again, he accused me of being immature. He used hurtful terms such as jealousy and brought up old arguments. Being a hypocrite, he was the one who had forsaken the role of being a dutiful husband. He also neglected his responsibility as a father. Instead, he turned his attention to outsiders.

I brought up divorce, but he always reacted by being evasive and changing the subject again and again.

At first, I assumed it was coming out of a place of immaturity, that he was being childish, but now I understood that he wanted his cake and wanted to eat it. He wanted to have a stable family, and he also wanted a girl that he had missed out on during his younger days.

How could someone be so selfish?

I was born with a heart condition, thus my parents were wary of me moving so far away from them. When I got married, my parents wept. They gnashed their teeth and cautioned me to not regret the decision I had made. They said I was rebellious, and that they would never forgive my betrayal.

I got ahead of myself then and had chosen an irreversible path.

In the end, I lost everything.

When I looked at my daughter curled up at the head of the bed, I felt a throb in my heart.

‘My poor darling Ava. Did you know that I miss my parents too?’

I didn't even get the chance to apologize to them. Everything they warned me about came true in the end. Even in my death, I could not get their forgiveness.

Ava's fever was getting worse by the minute. She hugged my arm and mumbled while dozing off.

“Mommy, why doesn't Daddy care about us? Does he not want us anymore?”

I wouldn’t manage to answer the question even if I was still alive. I wanted to tell her that none of this was her fault. The only reason her father was being so cruel was that he did not love Mommy anymore.

He had fallen for Zelda. Even if Max was not from his flesh, he still doted on him. His problem was not with Ava specifically, but only with the fact that she was a child he had with me.

Ava curled herself into a ball, appearing frail. Despite that, she was very headstrong and stayed by my side.

Around midday, a gleam of sunlight shone into the room. Several beads of sweat glistened on her forehead. She held my hand which had gone cold for a long time, then she started to cry.

“Mommy, I'm so hungry. I feel terrible. Mommy, please wake up. I miss you.”

She was suffering from the terrible heat sweltering inside her body. With that, she went to the bathroom to rinse herself with cold water so that she could cool off.

The sudden change in temperature only made her feel worse. She shivered from the spike of cold.

After that, she scrambled to the kitchen and managed to find a jar of pickled cabbage which she stuffed herself with. It was a jar of pickled cabbage that I had bought but forgotten to put inside the refrigerator. After three days, it had already turned yellow.

She had always been a very picky girl, but now she was eating pickled vegetables without complaint.

Then, she brought the jar to the couch and finished its contents in front of me with great effort. I could tell from the look in her eyes that she was pushing herself to finish them. She refused to back down.

“Mommy, look. I will take care of myself until you wake up.”

I felt as if a thousand needles were prickling at my heart. That could hardly count as a proper meal, yet she had to force herself to eat it just to stay alive.

What had the child ever done wrong? She was just a victim pincered between the conflict between Eliott and me.

I thought Eliott’s outburst yesterday was only coming out of a place of anger. In the past, he would always come home eventually even if we had a major argument. This was the longest he had been away. He was still nowhere to be seen even though he should have finished work by this hour.

While I was getting increasingly desperate, the phone on the table suddenly rang.

It was Eliott calling.