My husband and my best friend had seemingly vanished during my grandfather-in-law's funeral. As I searched for them, I passed Shawn Whitaker's coffin and suddenly saw a live chat window flash into view:

[Oh goodie, we're finally dealing with a male lead with a 200 IQ! He dragged Best Girl straight into the coffin before that bitch could find out!]

[Aww, he's comforting Best Girl because she's scared of the dark! Aaaaahhhhh!]

[That annoying extra is still outside looking for Vincent. She's so dumb, oh my god. I'm right here cheering for Best Boy to cheat with Best Girl because I swear that bitch exists just to get in their way!]

Fury surged through me. I moved to flip the coffin lid open, but Jasmine grabbed my arm. "Wait! He can't possibly be in there. I think he went to buy Grandpa coffin nails."

[Get yourself a little sister who helps you find happiness like Jazzy, chat.]

[And now, in the warm, cramped, humid darkness, two bodies collide and sparks fly. This is metal as hell.]

[It's also dangerous as hell. I'm just glad our guy was smart enough to leave a crack for air.]

I smirked. Oh, was he?

I slammed the lid shut, dragged a nearby lounge chair over, and settled into it.

"We've got an hour before the funeral begins, don't we? I think I'll keep Grandpa company."

The audience was stunned. [An hour?! They're going to die in there!]

Jasmine was horrified. "What was that, Aya?!"

"What was what?" I retorted calmly. "The cover wasn't shut tightly for some reason. We can't leave even the slightest crack open, Jazzy. Flies could get into Grandpa."

Jasmine was tongue-tied. She stared at the coffin in a panic and tried another approach. "Look, Mom needs you to check our procedure again. The priest seems to have found some problems or something. Can you please go and see what that's about?"

I crossed my arms. "I distinctly remember having checked the procedure three times with the priest yesterday."

"No, no! That's not enough!" she snapped impatiently. "God, can you please possess a little self-awareness for once? You're supposed to be helping your husband's family, damn it!"

She was right about one thing. I had helped them since their grandfather died three days ago. I had less than ten hours of sleep in all three days. The Whitakers had put all of their effort inviting the city's biggest elites to the grand funeral while I was the only one planning and executing the entire thing.

[Never underestimate Jazzy! Girl's got 200 IQ points too!]

[He can't get out of there as long as that bitch's still there! Gah, can she just fuck off already?! Best Girl's running out of breath!]

[Jazzy's done it. Now we watch Aya do whatever she can to please her. Jazzy has trained her like a pup!]

I balled my hands into fists.

I had been married to Vincent Whitaker for five whole years. I cooked. I cleaned. I learned to make his favorite soup in exacting details, down to the perfect temperature like I was some sort of soup engineer.

I remembered the birthdays of my in-laws. It did not matter if it was my mother-in-law's, my sister-in-law's, my aunts-in-law, or any relative who was either born or made a Whitaker. I remembered their likes and dislikes, their yums and yucks, and never once gave a gift they could refuse.

I did all I could to be the best wife and in-law any family could have asked for. And yet, for some reasons, Jasmine never warmed up to me. She always took Stephanie's—my so-called best friend—hand during family gatherings and loudly said things like, "Oh my god, you're starting a studio of your own? That's so fun! I wish some people could be a little more interesting and ambitious too!

"I wish you were my sister-in-law, Stephie. You're beautiful, elegant, talented, and kind. You're perfect!"

All I could do was to smile glumly to myself whenever this happened.

Well, not anymore. That life ends today.

"Aya Burton!"

I reeled. Calling me by my maiden name? That was the first sign. She always referred to me as that whenever she wanted me to acquiesce. I always did.

"The priest is waiting for you!" Jasmine snarled. "We need to make sure the procedures are right, Aya. Do you hear me? Everything has to be perfect! You can't afford for it to be anything less. Mark my words!"

[She's going for another critical hit! Lying to save two lives, go!]

[Stephie, please just hold on! Jazzy is coming to rescue you!]

[Can't Aya Bitch-ton just drop dead and die already?! Her existence literally improves *nothing!*]

"Jazzy. The priest and I had already discussed the details of Grandpa's funeral, including the passage that would be inscribed on his gravestone. Then he explained it to the entire family, and Mom gave him the green light. There's literally nothing else to be done about that," I replied matter-of-factly.

I took a stack of papers from my bag and handed it to her. "Would you like to look at it again?"

Jasmine ignored the papers, her irritation mounting. She had not expected me to push back.

"That was yesterday! Things have changed since then, okay? So can you stop being a smartass and do what you're supposed to do already?"

I nodded. "Alright. You've got a point."

Her eyes softened, a trace of smugness settling in.

I took out my phone and called the priest.

"Hello? Mrs. Whitaker?" the man answered.

"Good day, Father Matthew. Sorry to bother you," I said politely. "My mother-in-law mentioned there were changes to be made for Mr. Shawn Whitaker, my grandfather-in-law. She said you wanted them amended and hoped to discuss them with me. Is that correct?"

Silence ensued.

Jasmine's face flushed bright pink.

"Uh, I don't believe there's anything significant pending amendment, ma'am. There's no need to trouble yourself," he replied at last.

That was a roundabout way of asking what I was talking about.

[Wait, when did she grow a brain?]

[She's supposed to be a low-IQ bimbo, chat. Vincent married her for that! How else is he going to take control of her family business?]

[Guys, relax. He'll take all her assets, kick that dumb bitch to the curb, and live happily ever after with Best Girl Stephie. This is just a red herring.]

I glared at the live chat.

So that was the ending written for me? Not a chance.

"What is your problem, Aya? Did you really need to act like a Pulitzer Prize reporter and verify every detail? What's the point here? To humiliate my mom, who's old enough to get confused?" Jasmine snapped. "Just check with her and confirm everything, for God's sake. It's not a big ask."

"I'm taking this seriously because it's our grandfather's funeral, Jazzy. People are coming from near and far to pay their last respects to a life well lived. We should be careful and precise," I replied evenly. "I also don't think it's right to leave a gap in the coffin when it should already be sealed. This is exactly the kind of mistake we avoid by taking things seriously."

Jasmine froze. Nearby, relatives and visitors began to murmur.

"Wait, they didn't close the lid properly? Why is there a gap?"

"That's a serious oversight. I doubt Mr. Whitaker's soul would be pleased…"

Jasmine had always been thin-skinned. She would never risk tarnishing her pristine image, and I was counting on that.

From where I stood, I could see the coffin shifting slightly and smiled. Now that was devotion carried to the grave. Their passion must be intense enough to leave them breathless.

Vincent and Stephanie were likely drenched in sweat and gasping for air by now. Even the live chat grew anxious.

[Oh God, oh God, oh God!]

[My Best Girl is dying, you bitch!]

[Do something, Jazzy! Please!]

Just as it seemed we had reached a stalemate, Jasmine's eyes lit up. "Aunt Kimmy!"

Kim approached with a bowl of soup. "There you are, sweetie. I've been looking everywhere for you. You've helped so much with the funeral. You must be hungry. Here, I made this for you. Take a break in the lounge. I'll handle things here."

[Vincent texted her for help! She's here to save him!]

[Drink it! Drink it and get drugged! I need my Best Girl out of there!]

I pushed the bowl away. "I can't accept this, Aunt Kimmy."

Kim's jaw tightened as she raised her voice. "Are you really going to reject my kindness in front of everyone? Or are you trying to embarrass the whole family?"

[Stop throwing a fit, Aya! No one cares! My girl is dying in there!]

[She just needs one sip. It takes less than three minutes for the drug to work! Then our best couple can be free!]

[Aunt Kimmy's going all out for her cheating nephew, huh?]

Kim pressed the bowl toward my lips.

I raised my hand and knocked it aside, sending the contents spilling over my thighs. I let out a startled cry as the bowl slipped from my grasp and shattered on the floor.

"Oh no… Why am I always so clumsy?" I said, forcing an apologetic tone. "The soup was too hot, and my hand slipped. I'm sorry."

Kim grabbed my shoulder and yelled, "This won't do! You can't be unpresentable at your grandfather-in-law's funeral! Change into new clothes right now!"

She tried to drag me toward the door.

The live chat cheered.

[She's the GOAT!!! Getting changed will take at least five minutes!]

[They just need one minute, bro. Just a small crack in the coffin so they can breathe!]

[Get out of there already, you annoying side character. My best girl needs fresh air!]

[Poor Stephie's already crying. She wanted to get out so badly, but Vincent isn't letting her. He's holding her hands down!]

Jasmine seized the opportunity. She grabbed my other arm and said, "I'll go with you, Aya!"

They tried to haul me out of the hall.

A sound came from the coffin.

Kim went pale.

"Let's not dawdle, Aya!" she said loudly, trying to cover the noise. Her eyes twitched as she shot several glances at the coffin. She was counting down the seconds until we were gone.

I did not resist. I let them drag me toward the door. Just before stepping out, I pretended to collapse to the side.

I rubbed my temples and said weakly, "Oh no… Aunt Kimmy, Jazzy… My head's spinning. I feel sick. I can't stand… Could you get the clothes for me instead? I can change here. Maybe in that corner."

I pointed to an area near the coffin. It was far too exposed for anyone to change without being seen.

Kim's expression darkened. Jasmine froze.

The live chat turned vicious.

[That fucking bitch!]

[Just jump out of the coffin and divorce her right now! Sue her until she has nothing left!]

[He can't, you dumbass. He needs to secure her family's business first!]

[I would've dropped this story ages ago if I didn't know she's going to crash and burn!]

I looked up at Kim with an innocent expression. "I don't have the strength to make it to the changing room. I can't even sit straight. I think there's a chair behind the casket. Could you ask someone to move it and bring it to me?"

"No!" she shrieked, her voice cracking. She quickly forced it under control and added with a stiff smile, "I don't want to disturb my father's rest."

She glanced at my soaked slacks, then at the coffin, and clenched her teeth. "You'll have to make do like this."

A loud thud came from inside the coffin.

The visitors went pale and stared.

Kim grimaced. "It's a rat. This hall hasn't been used in ages. There's probably an infestation. One must have burrowed into the coffin…"

[It's Stephanie! She can't hold it in anymore!]

[Vincent's not doing great either!]

"Really?" I asked innocently. "How big would a rat have to be to make a sound like that?"

[Oh my God! Vincent's giving her CPR now!]

[What kind of plot is this? I'm actually kind of excited!]

[I can't wait to see her face when she realizes her best friend and husband are inside!]

A few seconds later, another voice cut in, "What is going on here?"

[It's the mother-in-law! She's here to save her son!]

"Dulce, I brought your daughter-in-law soup to thank her for her hard work. Do you know what she did? She deliberately knocked it over, dirtied her pants, and then clung to the coffin in front of everyone. It looked like she was trying to make us seem like we treat her as a slave!"

Dulce barked from outside the door, "Someone take Aya to the lounge! She's exhausted herself and is now delirious!"

Two of Jazzy's distant aunts exchanged uncertain looks.

"Why are you forcing me out of the hall, Mom?" I shouted.

"Why are you so eager to call me delirious?" I pointed at the coffin. "Could it be that something else is hidden inside? Someone other than Grandpa?"