My Engagement Dress Mailed To His True Love

I'd been in love with Tanner for five years, making him the center of my universe. But after he denied our relationship for the hundredth time, I decided it was time to let go. I stopped asking him to bring me to his friends' gatherings and, as he wanted, gave up my role as his secretary to his childhood friend and quit the job. I even sent our engagement dress to the woman he truly considered his fiancée. When he erupted in anger, I quietly responded, "Mr. Fox, we're just regular friends."

Tanner’s past words were like a boomerang, now hitting him hard, while I learned that loving myself was more important than loving anyone else, and I wouldn’t look back.

Walking down the deserted street in my four-inch heels, my mind was a haze. I didn’t see the bicycle coming until it knocked me to the ground. My knee was scraped, and the new shoes blistered my feet. The cyclist quickly jumped off, helping me to a nearby bench.

He asked kindly if I needed a ride to the hospital. Snapping back to reality, I shook my head lightly. "No need, I’m fine." My real wounds were internal, where my heart was bleeding.

Not quite convinced, the cyclist left me thirty dollars and his phone number before departing. I couldn’t help but smirk at the irony: a stranger showing me more concern than my fiancé ever did.

Today was Tanner’s thirtieth birthday and also marked the fifth anniversary of our relationship. Trying to impress him, I wore the dress and heels he liked, eagerly hoping he’d introduce me to his friends as his fiancée. Instead, I heard him dismissively say, "Lydia and I are just friends, don’t start rumors!"

In two weeks, we were supposed to be engaged. Yet, to everyone else, I was still just a “friend.” It was the hundredth time he’d refused to acknowledge me publicly. Feeling worn out, I claimed “not feeling well” as an excuse and left the room.

Tanner quickly followed, not to apologize but to scold me for embarrassing him in front of his friends. I looked at him seriously and asked, “Tanner, we’re about to get engaged. Why won’t you publicly acknowledge me as your girlfriend?”

A flicker of guilt crossed his eyes before he regained his composure. “It’s just a label. Why are you so hung up on it? Haven’t things been fine these past five years? Once we’re engaged, everyone will know anyway. Don’t be so petty!”

I chuckled inwardly. As his girlfriend and fiancée, all I wanted was for him to acknowledge my role in his life. To him, it was being petty. I knew too well his reluctance stemmed from his feelings for Amaia, his childhood friend. But I was too drained to call him out anymore.

“You should get back; your friends are waiting. I’ll head home since I’m feeling off.” Tanner, annoyed, raised his voice: “I left my friends to follow you, and you keep acting out! It’s just not acknowledging you—why make it a big deal? If you were as understanding as Amaia, I'd have announced us ages ago!”

“Since you’re leaving, I won’t stop you. Go home and think about it; I need to decide if we should go through with this engagement.” With that, he angrily jerked his hand away and returned to the room. His words cut me like a knife, making it hard to breathe.

Before, seeing Tanner angry would have prompted me to soothe him despite any hurt. But this time, I was completely worn out. The dress I wore, the heels, even my hairstyle, were all for him. Was Tanner really worth losing myself over?

I stood still for a long while, my palm bearing the marks of clenched nails. Yet stubbornly, I did not return to the room. As I stepped out of the hotel, a text message appeared on my phone:

[Lydia, did Tanner fail to acknowledge your relationship again today? I’m telling you, as long as I disagree, you’ll remain his secret girlfriend!]

This wasn’t the first time Amaia had texted to provoke me. Each time, my heart would ache. I showed Tanner these messages before. But he accused me of misinterpreting Amaia’s words with a petty mind. Although they were childhood friends, I had known him for nearly a decade and been with him for five years.

From the moment I saw Tanner, I was captivated, convinced he was the man I’d marry. To please him, I wore dresses and makeup I didn't care for, styled my hair to his liking. Anything he wanted, I pretended to enjoy despite my disdain.

I did everything to win Tanner over, and gradually he warmed to me. I thought I was close to becoming his girlfriend, but then Amaia returned from a long trip. Though Tanner treated me decently, his feelings for Amaia were a different story.

I realized Tanner’s true affection lay with Amaia. Just when I was ready to give up chasing him, he suddenly confessed to me. Yet he never admitted our relationship publicly, while he could attend Amaia’s family gatherings as her boyfriend. That’s the difference between love and indifference.

What puzzled me was why Tanner, clearly fond of Amaia, chose to be with me. I sat on the bench for a long time, deep in thought. The phone rang, and a glimmer of hope rose—maybe Tanner was calling. But it was Samira, my friend. She thought I hadn’t arrived at the hotel yet and asked if I needed a lift. I told her I had already been there and left early.

She was surprised. “What? Why leave Tanner’s party so soon? Had you planned some secret surprise?”

I instinctively replied, “No, I just broke up with him.” On the other end, there was silence, then shock: “Tanner, that jerk, ditched you today. See if I…”

I quickly cut her off, “I was the one who broke it off.”

Her outrage halted; she seemed stunned by my words. Everyone knew how I had pursued Tanner all these years, clinging to him for five years just to make him mine. I’d pick him up drunk at night, devotedly clean, do laundry, and cook for him.

His friends often joked I was his devoted follower. Tanner would nonchalantly say, “It’s her choice. I never forced her.” I felt hurt hearing this but believed my devotion would eventually win him over.

Reality was a harsh teacher; Tanner’s heart would never be mine. After ending the call, I removed my high heels and tossed them in the trash, along with my feelings for Tanner.

I hailed a cab back to Tanner’s apartment and started packing my things. Midway, one of Tanner’s friends called: “Lydia, Tanner’s drunk. Can you come pick him up?”

Due to Tanner’s refusal to acknowledge me, even though everyone knew the truth, no one called me “sis-in-law.” They only referred to Amaia that way.

For example, I overheard someone say: “Sis-in-law, Tanner’s drunk, and he’s been calling your name! Shows how deeply he cares for you.” Then Amaia’s shy voice responded, “Don’t be silly; you must have heard wrong.”

I paused, then spoke slowly: “Isn’t your ‘sis-in-law’ with him? Why ask a friend like me to pick him up?”