The Swan's Death

Once we officially became a couple, Edwin took great care of me. He would spend time with me every day, cook meals, and heat water. We would even video chat before sleeping, and he insisted on watching me fall asleep before ending the call.

All of this perfectly filled the void left by a lack of affection from my family, and I quickly became dependent on him.

He was nearly perfect, except for one flaw. He was somewhat frugal. When we ate, I always ordered one meat dish and two vegetable dishes, while he only got one vegetable dish for himself.

I wanted him to order a meat dish as well, but he said it was unnecessary as the portion was enough.

Luckily, I couldn't finish so much food, and I would only eat a small portion, giving the rest to him.

He rarely bought new clothes. Whenever he saw me buying new clothes, he would advise me to be thrifty and not waste money.

He once saw me buying a set of "Lancôme" skincare products. But upon learning the price, he furrowed his brows and asked me, "Do you really need such expensive cosmetics?"

At that moment, I detected an air of disdain in his eyes. Quick to defend myself, I hastily explained, "My sister uses them too."

But he responded, "What a waste of money. Do you realize how many meals a child from a poor family could have with the money you spent on this skincare set?"

I was stunned. I was just using my money. What did it have to do with children from poor families having enough to eat?

But then he said, "You've been pampered at home, and I don't think you're good at managing finances. Why don't we combine our living expenses, and I'll take care of the budgeting? Don't worry. I won't spend your money, and I'll keep track of everything."

There was some truth to his words. I indeed tended to spend recklessly and lacked financial management skills.

Considering his kindness towards me, I naturally placed my trust in him. On the same day, I handed over my bank card to him.

From then on, he controlled my monthly living expenses of twenty thousand dollars.

I had to ask him for money to buy clothes and shoes, or even for snacks and sanitary pads. Before granting me any funds, he would extensively question me, evaluating whether the expenditure was "worth it."

Though I felt a hint of dissatisfaction, I convinced myself that his frugality was for my benefit and endured it.

University life was rich and vibrant. There were many student clubs. Based on my dance skills, I joined several clubs.

Consequently, whenever there was an event at the school, the dance and drama clubs would be called upon to perform.

Although I was timid by nature, I had a persistent passion for the stage.

From childhood to adulthood, I had taken part in countless performances and competitions at the city, state, and even national levels, resulting in trophies and medals piling up in half of my family's basement.

Moreover, I didn't specialize in just one type of dance. Apart from ballet, I could dance classical, modern, and even street dance with grace.

Not surprisingly, on New Year's Eve of my first year at college, I became famous for my solo performance of "The Swan's Death."

However, he was angry.

Before the event concluded, he dragged me away from backstage, where I was clad only in my ballet costume and a cotton jacket.

In the bitter cold of the northern winter, it could really be life-threatening, but he disregarded it and reproached me in the snow for nearly half an hour.

He kept saying that I didn't respect myself, dressed disgracefully and sought people's attention.

I shivered with crossed arms, crying and begging him to let me go back and put on some clothes. He retorted, "Don't you like dressing lightly? A cotton jacket is more than enough for you."

Then, shockingly, he tore off my thin cotton jacket, leaving me exposed on the snowy night.

It wasn't until someone passed by that he angrily put the clothes back on me and carried me back to the classroom.

That night, in the classroom, he had his way with me.

The Nightmare Begins

At first, I didn't want it.

I cried bitterly and couldn't understand how my passion had become so unbearable in his eyes.

However, Edwin continued to kiss me, apologizing and claiming that he loved me so much that he couldn't bear the thought of other men fantasizing about me.

Under his relentless onslaught, I forgave him and gave him my virginity.

To my surprise, there was no bleeding afterwards.

Edwin looked at me incredulously, examining the clothing for a long time, and suddenly wore a look of hurt.

He began to scold and ridicule me, proclaiming himself nothing more than a scavenger. He completely disregarded my tearful explanations that it was indeed my first time.

Afterward, he hastily cleaned up the scene and left on his own, saying he needed some time alone.

During the following three days of vacation, Edwin never contacted me. Meanwhile, I was bedridden with a fever due to the cold I caught that night.

Seeing my condition worsen, my roommates, despite previous conflicts, took care of me and eventually sent me to the hospital when my coughing persisted.

The diagnosis came quickly: pneumonia, requiring hospitalization.

Alone in the hospital bed with an IV drip, I silently shed tears. I longed for home, for my parents and sister.

But I dared not tell them I was sick, fearing they would come from far away to care for me.

If that happened, I would revert to being the pampered little princess, and Edwin said it wasn't right.

Inevitably, thoughts of Edwin surged through my mind, causing aches in my heart.

I couldn't believe that the person who professed love for me would turn against me because of something beyond my control.

I had read online that many people didn't experience bleeding during their first time.

But how could I make him believe me?

Lost in these chaotic thoughts, I drifted into a deep sleep. When I woke up again, he was there.

Sitting by the bedside, he gazed at me with intense yet icy eyes. However, as soon as our eyes met, his expression changed, as if it were all an illusion.

Edwin gently took my hand and asked how I was feeling and if anything was bothering me.

At that moment, my grievances and longing for him flooded out, and tears once again streamed down my face.

"How could you not believe me? I didn't lie to you. I've never had a boyfriend before," I implored.

He ruffled my hair and said, "I'm sorry. It's my fault. I love you so much and care about you deeply. You have to understand that men attach great importance to these things. Can you forgive me?"

Still weeping, I nodded without hesitation.

But upon reflection, I realized that he never actually said he believed me. Nor did he ever reflect on whether it was right for him to care so much about it.

And so, we patched things up. He visited me after school every day, sometimes bringing two apples for us to share, and other times a single red rose.

The woman next to my sickbed jokingly said, "Miss, your boyfriend is quite thrifty."

I sensed the underlying meaning in her words and felt uncomfortable.

One night, when he came over, I told him I wanted a hamburger.

After a moment of silence, he agreed to buy one the next day.

And true to his words, he brought an Angus combo the next day and stuffed it into my arms.

The Bank Card

Edwin stuffed the burger bag into my arms and said, "I ran a long way to buy this for you. Go ahead and eat."

Even though the paper bag was chilly, I felt warm. I glanced at the woman next to my sickbed, smiling, and asked him, "Why didn't you buy more? Let's eat together."

To my surprise, he looked annoyed and said, "What's there to eat? Do you know how much this combo costs? Listen up, this happens only once. Don't indulge in such things frequently. They're expensive and not even that tasty. The meat pies made in my hometown are better and cheaper."

My hands paused in opening the package, and I found it hard to believe what I was hearing.

With a monthly living allowance of twenty thousand dollars, was I not worthy of a McDonald's meal?

Back home, I was always dining at fancy foreign restaurants where a single meal could cost over five hundred dollars.

Seeing my change in expression, he quickly added, "I'm not saying you can't eat it. But since you're ill, you shouldn't consume such greasy and heat-inducing food."

I still felt distressed, and tears welled up in my eyes.

Seeing this, he seemed flustered, hastening to draw the curtain around the bed, wiping my tears while consoling me in a low voice.

"We'll get married in the future, have children, and take care of our parents. All of this requires money, so it's only natural that we learn to save. Don't you agree?"

I was stunned once again.

We had been dating for less than half a year, and the first semester of college hadn't even finished, yet he was already making promises and planning our future!

Seeing my perplexed expression, he smiled, kissed me, and called me a silly girl who understood nothing but crying.

And just like that, I became a foolish girl, forgetting all my previous grievances.

Two weeks later, I was discharged from the hospital and returned to campus. Not long after, the winter break began.

My family sent a car to pick me up. My parents and sister came to see me, noticing my weight loss and expressing concern.

They even suggested I transfer to the local college near home. However, I already had Edwin in my heart and refused their offer.

Before departing, I asked Edwin if he wanted to meet my parents, but he declined.

I supposed he wasn't ready, and my parents might not approve of me having a boyfriend so soon, so I didn't insist.

Before going home, I didn't retrieve that bank card.

I had a very enjoyable holiday, and my family bought me many high-end items. Clothes, shoes, bags, and cosmetics restored me to the carefree and joyful little princess.

However, whenever we video-called at night, he seemed unhappy to see my radiant appearance.

More than once, he mockingly called me "Miss Spoiled." He would ask, "Do you remember what you promised me?".

His face was filled with disdain when he asked.

"But it's the New Year. Can't I wear new clothes?" I retorted.

"Do new clothes have to be so expensive? What's the difference between a twenty-thousand-dollar coat and a hundred-dollar one? Aren't they both just pieces of clothing? As long as it keeps you warm, it's a good one," he argued.

Pausing for a moment, I asked him, "Edwin, have you bought new clothes?"

Annoyance flashed across his face as he replied, "I don't have that kind of spare money."

Hastily, I said, "There should still be some money in my account. You can use it to buy new clothes."

His anger flared further. "What do you take me for? If I spend your money, will I become a gigolo?"

I hurriedly defended myself, "No, that's not true. Even if the money is with me, I still want to buy clothes for you during the New Year. You can use it without any worries. I'll have more money when school starts."

He fell silent, his lips tightly pressed as he watched me in the video. Suddenly, he said, "Harper, I miss you."