The memories could stop my heart, and I got goosebumps on my arm where Stella touched me.

It felt as if a serpent coiled around me—a cold creepiness that swelled in my heart, leaving me so sick and nauseated I could throw up right then.

I knocked Stella's hand away as hard as I could and arched my back, holding myself against the front seat with one hand while I clasped the other over my mouth and retched violently.

Although I hadn't eaten for days and there was nothing I could vomit, the pungent acid scent sent Stella scrambling for a tissue to stuff her nostrils, while snapping at me in disgust, "What are you doing?!"

But I kept retching as I couldn't hear a thing, and only stopped when I no longer felt sick.

Stella said nothing and kept glaring coolly at me, and I knew well enough to tell that she was on the verge of an outburst.

While I usually would play dumb and ignore that, I didn't do so this time—just as I knew fully well I had no right to fight back, just as I was too enfeebled.

Keeping my head down as my fingers dug into the front seat, I said, "I'm sorry… I can walk on my own—I'm really sorry I got your car dirty. I'll wash it when I get home."

Stella paused and studied me suspiciously for a moment, and suddenly reached out toward my head.

I watched as her hand got closer, my whole body stiffening.

I knew I shouldn't avoid her touch because I had always yearned for her to respond to my affection.

However, she was very assertive and thought little of me, and would verbally destroy me if I even upset her a little—so that I felt embarrassed and hurt.

I stiffened in my seat, telling myself repeatedly not to hide or upset her.

However, when her cool fingers reached me again, I felt the same creepy serpentine sensation once more, and couldn't help turning my face away from her touch.

Stella's hand was left frozen mid-air, and when she looked at me again, I felt her indignation and impatience.

However, that was when I felt nauseated once more, and I shook my head repeatedly.

Suddenly, Stella's face was gone, and I was looking at my grandfather lying on his sick bed.

Because of these people, I had lost the only person who had been good to me.

As I blinked, tears gushed down my cheeks.

Seeing that, Stella—who clearly had some choice words for me—ultimately said nothing, and turned to tell the chauffeur to drive faster in it.

As I wiped my tears with my sleeves, I curled into a ball, staying silent and did my best to appear invisible.

My vision was a blur as I stared blankly outside, when it occurred to me.

If only Stella were willing to help, Grandpa would have been saved.

I wouldn't have to borrow from loan sharks either, let alone end up in this sorry state.

But in the end, pondering about what ifs was pointless.

-

When the MPV stopped, I bumped my forehead on the front seat from inertia.

"Are you okay?" Stella asked.

Her asking me that was like seeing a blue moon.

Still, I shook my head in silence, clutching my forehead.

For her part, she didn't press the issue and alighted right away, ignoring me and entered the Sullivan residence.

I went upstairs and quickly took a bath, changing out of my filthy trousers.

There were several gruesome holes on my left kneecap—the blood had dried and blackened.

It was a souvenir from the loan sharks, who had hammered several nails into my kneecap, and laughed out loud as I rolled around the ground, screaming and writhing in pain.

After that, they starved me and said I only got to eat if I pulled those nails out with my own bare hands.

It had been nothing less than an absolute nightmare.

Nonetheless, I changed into fresh clothes and cleaned up my wounds before heading downstairs.

It just happened to be dinner, and my mother looked at me in disbelief, but soon beckoned while scoffing. "So you can find your way back. And you were gone so long without even calling home…"

My grief was ready to burst right then, but someone spoke before I could, "Mom, aren't you going to have tea with Mrs. Chandler?"

It was Uriah, dressed sharply in a suit as he strode in the door.

Mom quickly turned away from me, exclaiming, "Oh, right! I almost forgot—thanks for reminding me!"

Uriah shrugged and settled on the couch, grinning at me as he said, "Oh, you're finally back, John. It's high time you learned to fend for yourself and stop upsetting our parents."

Everyone turned toward me right then, while my heart skipped a beat when I saw Uriah's mocking grin.

But I didn't snap like before, and my mother didn't refute it.

Just one glance at Uriah, and she was shaking her head disapprovingly. "You're losing weight again, Uriah. You haven't been eating well, have you?

"Your health is always more important than work, and it's not like your dad resigned yet."

Hearing that, I quietly hid my hand behind myself.

I was barely a few feet away from my mother, but she never noticed my limp or my bruised hand.

And yet, she immediately noticed that Uriah wasn't eating well.

On the other hand, Uriah smiled. "Right, I should be more disciplined since John has made enough trouble for you."

Mom glanced at me, looking like she had much to say but only sighed.

-

As my mom tried to get me to eat more at the dinner table, I tamely thanked her. However, she still sighed wryly.

But thankfully, she didn't lecture me, even giving me the debit card she and Dad had confiscated before.

"Look, John—we were so worried when you left, so we decided we won't be so strict with you. Your dad deposited more money in the card too."

My fingers clenched around the card for a moment, but I soon let go.

The card came back to me way too late.

Somehow, I could feel Uriah staring at me throughout, but when I looked up at him, he turned and smiled at Stella who sat beside him. "It's like you're only capable of getting better. I can't even be mad about losing to you at that auction."

Stella rolled her eyes, but pulled out a gift box and spoke with a milder tone than usual, "Here's your birthday present. Sorry I couldn't make it since I was on a business trip abroad."

"Oh, and I thought you're so busy you've forgotten," Uriah chuckled, and opened the box to reveal a dark-green wristwatch.

I paused, as I had seen it on a list of auctioned items.

Back then, I had taken a liking to it right away, but I didn't have an invitation to said auction event.

Stella had noticed me staring, and told me coolly then, "Don't cause trouble, and I'll buy it for your birthday."

But now, she was giving it to Uriah—even if she said nothing, I knew that it was my punishment.

Nonetheless, I excused myself politely from my table after eating my fill and left the table, only for Stella to confront me upstairs.

Stella stood in her high heels, looking at once imposing yet bewitching.

In the past, just seeing her like that would send me jumping toward her.

But now, my heart didn't race at all.

She never noticed, and walked closer, her heels clicking in her wake. "You've changed."

I kept my head down so that I wasn't looking at her, and she continued with her holier-art-thou tone, "I know you liked that watch, but you caused so much trouble in just two weeks. Not getting it is your punishment.

"That said, you've been disciplined today and I'm so satisfied I can grant you one wish… As long as it's not too much."

I looked up at her face, suddenly feeling nostalgic.

The first time we had met was at a party—those rich brats from the city who were told by their parents to suck up to me, were instead mocking me because of my choice of clothing.

I was too self-deprecating to fight back, let alone speak out loud.

It was Stella who stepped up, slapping their ringleader across the face and calling them bums.

After those rich brats fled, she turned to me, frowning. "You are the heir to the Sullivans. Don't cringe and cower—show some spine. They're all meant to grovel at your feet."

I stuttered, "B-But they might hate me…"

"Hate?" Stella scoffed. "No. Always remember—your last name alone is reason enough for them to fawn all over you, even if you kick them around. Understand?!"

And I had held on to those words for five years.

But in the end, Stella turned against me too, belittling me in full view of the public, calling me names or snapping at me for making a scene over the little things—even if those rich brats were the ones who had started it.

That protectiveness she showed when we first met had also long since faded, and I couldn't find any sign of it on her face now.

"Have you thought of something yet?" she urged me. "I'm on the clock. Don't be so greedy."

I had to lean against the wall as I felt the faint painful spasms in my left leg, clearing my head.

And she was the reason I was suffering.

I had told the loan sharks who I was, even calling her number—which I had committed to memory, for help.

But what had she done?

"What are you playing at this time?!" she had snapped at me over the phone. "All you do is hang out with your useless friends—won't you ever learn to improve?! The Sullivans could really do without a piece of shit like you."

Not satisfied, she went on to snap at those loan sharks.

Furious, they vented their anger on me, making me slap myself, only stopping me when my cheeks swelled and were barely recognizable, and I could feel my teeth aching.

And because my cheeks were too swollen, even eating suddenly took effort.

I couldn't even chew the buns they threw at me, so they stomped them into tiny pieces caked with dirt before shoving them into my mouth.

My stomach was churning again at the thought, but I fought against the impulse to retch and shook my head. "Sorry, there's nothing I want."

Stella lifted a brow suspiciously, and growled threateningly, "I gave you a chance but you spurned it. Just don't bother me later—I'm not that patient."

"No, I won't," I replied quietly.

All I wanted was for her to leave right then.

"You'd better not," she snorted.

For her part, she didn't insist—perhaps because she was reluctant to reward me in the first place.

She strode off, but paused a few paces away, "And don't bother Uriah anymore. There's nothing between us."

With that, she was gone before I could respond.