But I had no interest in explaining.

I treated him like he was nothing but air.

Just as I reached the corner of the hallway, I ran into Ryan and one of his friends again.

“Ryan, you need to tell Emma already. If Emma goes alone, are you really going to be okay with that?”

Ryan gave a disdainful snort.

“What does what she does have to do with me?

“Besides, she must have changed it already. She’s just throwing a fit. I can’t get rid of her no matter what I do. It’s exhausting.”

I froze for a second and happened to walk straight into them.

Ryan told the other guy and Caleb to leave first. Then he turned and blocked me in the corner.

“You went to the music festival with someone else instead of me? Emma, you’re getting bold now.

“You think that’s enough to make me jealous?”

He held my hand, his voice careless and lazy.

“Fine. I’ll apologize. I shouldn’t have snapped at you that day. Can we make up now?

“Did you check your application?”

After saying that, he hesitated for a moment before adding, “Did you happen to check mine too?”

I said nothing.

The atmosphere instantly turned awkward.

While we were still stuck in that stalemate, Sophie walked over.

“Ryan, they’re all picking on me. Come help me.”

Then she seemed to notice me for the first time, her voice filled with surprise.

“Oh, Emma, you’re here too? You didn’t come because you saw my Instagram Story, did you?

“Please don’t misunderstand. I just like lively places, so I asked Ryan to come. I’ve loved this band for ages.”

There it was again, that syrupy little act.

I had no patience for her performance. While Ryan’s attention shifted, I slipped out of the corner.

I was about to leave when Sophie reached out and stopped me.

“I’m sorry, Emma. Did I upset you by being here?

“I’ll leave. I just hope you and Ryan won’t fight because of me. He’s been in a bad mood because of you these past few days, and it really hurts me to see it.

“As long as he’s happy, I’ll do anything.”

After saying that, she lowered her reddened eyes and moved as if she were about to bow her head to me.

“What are you doing? Sophie, get up.”

Ryan shoved me aside and pulled Sophie into his arms, his face full of concern.

“Emma, can you stop losing it every time you see Sophie?

“We’re all going to spend the next three years together. Why do you have to be so petty?”

I stared at him and almost laughed.

“Do you honestly think the way you two act looks like normal friendship?”

He froze for a second, then sneered.

“What, so you finally can’t pretend anymore?

“Weren’t you the one who said she had it rough and asked us to take better care of her? So why are you getting jealous now?”

I stared at him.

The face I had known for more than ten years suddenly felt completely unfamiliar.

“If you love taking care of her so much, why don’t you just marry her?”

After saying that, I turned and left, ignoring Ryan’s furious shout behind me.

“If you walk away now, don’t ever come back.”

I did not even look back.

When I got home and sat down, I saw that Sophie had updated her Instagram Stories.

A group of them was playing Truth or Dare. Sophie had drawn a dare that required her to kiss anyone present.

Her gaze drifted toward Ryan, but he did not move for a long time.

“Ryan,” Sophie said softly, “you’re the person I know best here.”

“Oh, come on, Sophie. How are we not close to you? Are we invisible just because Ryan’s here?”

As the others teased and whistled, Sophie’s face grew redder and redder. She kept trying to explain in a panic, so anxious that tears came to her eyes.

Ryan was still sitting where he was.

“If Ryan doesn’t want to, I’ll drink as my penalty.”

With that, Sophie picked up the glass and squeezed her eyes shut.

A hand suddenly reached out from behind her and pressed the glass back down.

“You’re allergic to alcohol, and you’re still trying to drink? Are you out of your mind?”

“Then what am I supposed to do?” Sophie said. “If I don’t finish the dare, I have to take the penalty.”

Ryan looked at her, then lifted her chin.

“You really couldn’t choose anyone but me?”

“No.”

Blushing, Sophie grabbed Ryan by the collar, rose onto her toes, and kissed him tentatively.

This time, Ryan did not pull away.

Instead, he slid a hand around Sophie’s waist and deepened the kiss.

“Ryan, you absolute legend!”

The cheering and laughter around them grew louder and louder, while my heart felt as if it had been dropped into boiling oil, burning so badly I could barely breathe.

Even though I had already told myself I no longer cared about him, seeing that scene still hurt.

A relationship of more than ten years could not be ripped out of my heart without tearing something open.

At eleven fifty that night, something small suddenly hit my bedroom window.

A pebble.

It was the secret signal Ryan and I had shared for years.

For one second, I truly wished I could forget everything.

I leaned out to look.

Standing downstairs was Ryan, the same Ryan who had just been wrapped around Sophie moments ago.

His voice was coaxing and unsteady.

“Emma... stop being mad. Be good... Change your application...

“The UK is great... When we get there... I’ll take you to see Big Ben...”

When I went downstairs, I could smell alcohol on him.

His words came out slow and heavy, nothing like his usual arrogant self.

Honestly, wouldn’t it have been nice if he had always been like this?

If he had coaxed me until I became some hopeless girl in love, loving him with everything I had.

Thank God he had not.

“Emma, the UK is great too.

“If you want to see the Eiffel Tower, we can go whenever you want. It’s only a five hour flight.

“You’ve never been away from me before. You cry if you don’t see me for a single day. I don’t want you crying, so I’m letting you keep following me...”

In the version of this scene I had imagined for myself, I was supposed to slap him coldly, then turn and walk away with dignity.

But right then, my feet would not move.

So I took a deep breath and pushed Ryan away.

“Stop pretending to be drunk.”

Panic flickered through his eyes, but he immediately acted as if he had no idea what I was talking about.

Ryan, you really were such a disappointment.

Even now, why were you still so cowardly and dishonest?

“There’s no time, Emma. Let’s deal with the important thing first.”

He grabbed my hand and tried to unlock my phone.

“Be good. The UK is really great. Once this is over, you can be as angry as you want.

“I’ll listen to you from now on.”

I froze where I stood.

“So even now, you still won’t just tell me the truth?”

“Is that necessary?” he said. “You already know anyway.”

I was insane.

Absolutely insane for wasting even one more second on him.

I shoved him hard, sending him crashing to the ground.

Then I walked away while Ryan shouted desperately behind me.

“Emma, don’t regret this!”

Even now, he was still trying to threaten me.

I turned back and held up my phone.

“It’s twelve oh one.”

Ryan’s expression was almost impressive.

I went back to my room and threw myself into the dark.

One last time.

I would let myself fall apart one last time.

I would be sad over him one last time.

But just as dawn began to break, my mom pushed open my door.

“What happened between you two? Ryan came over first thing this morning.”