When I get reborn, I quietly change the name of the man I want to marry the most to the hedonistic playboy in the neighborhood.

My dad, who's a political officer, is quite surprised to see the change, but he still accepts my choice.

In my previous life, when Dad asked me who I liked the most among the young men of the military housing office, I uttered Judd Garrison's name with scarlet cheeks.

Dad nodded. "Judd is your childhood friend, not to mention our families are compatible in terms of social standing and wealth. You two have grown up together since you were kids, so I believe he will treat you well."

Later on, Judd and I got engaged and married. Our wedding was a fancy and high-profile one to the point that even the political leader gave us his blessings.

But Judd was quick to submit an application to help defend the border half a year into our marriage. He claimed that he wanted to contribute to the country with his efforts.

Not only did he abandon me, leaving me to take care of my in-laws on my own, but he also cut off contact with me when Dad was falsely accused of being corrupted.

Just as I thought I couldn't function anymore after suffering from the pain wrought upon me by Dad's death, I received the tragic news that Judd had died in a mountain flood as well.

Thanks to the devastation caused by both pieces of bad news, I ended up taking my own life by hanging myself.

What I didn't expect was that a gray-haired, elderly couple would visit my grave to pay respects to me 40 years after my death.

Judd, who should've been dead, had an arm wrapped around my cousin, Megan Whitlock, as they stood before my grave.

"It's my fault for faking my death and lying to you, Julie. Back then, I had to marry you in order to fulfill my parents' request. Megan has always been the woman that I truly love.

"This is all my fault, Julie. I just hope that you can stop pestering Megan from now on. If you really are resentful, you're free to direct your resentment at me."

To think that they loved each other to this extent…

Judd was willing to give up on his identity and fake his death in order to get out of his life with me so that he could stay with Megan forever. He even clung to the superstition that my postmortem resentment was the reason behind Megan's cancer.

Having found out about the truth, I let go of my obsession and faded into nothing.

When I open my eyes again, I've returned to the day Dad asks me who I like the most.

"Julie Whitlock, of all the lads in the yard, who do you want to marry most?"

When I saw Father standing there, alive and strong, my eyes instantly reddened. I couldn't help but throw myself into his arms.

In my past life, Judd Garrison's mother, Eleanor Prescott, had feared Father's corruption case would implicate the Garrisons. She locked me in the house and didn't let me out until Father's funeral was over.

I never got to see him one last time. All I could do was clutch his portrait and weep until I fainted.

I quickly raised my hands to wipe my eyes and said, "I want to marry Eric."

Father blinked in surprise. "Are you sure? Weren't you the one shouting as a kid that you'd marry no one but the boy from the Garrisons?"

When I nodded frantically through my tears, Father didn't understand why I was crying like this, but he relented.

"There, there. I'll talk to Chief Grayson in a couple of days and ask what he thinks, okay? Don't cry, sweetheart."

I dried my eyes and stepped out of the yard, only to see my childhood friend, Vanessa Lockhart, rushing over.

She grabbed my arm and complained, "Today's supposed to be the day you gather everyone and paint murals. Why are you going along with Megan's idea to bury time capsules?

"Can't you see that she's always trying to steal your spotlight?"

In the past, Vanessa often expressed her distaste for my cousin, Megan Whitlock, but I never took it to heart. But now that I thought about it, she was right.

When I was 13, Megan had snapped my bra strap in front of all our playmates in the neighborhood and said with fake concern, "Julie, your bra's getting worn out. You should tell your mom to buy you new ones."

She knew perfectly well Mother had died two years ago.

When I was 18, the neighborhood hosted a countryside labor trip for military officials and their families.

During a break, Judd and some of the boys said they were going to catch fish in the river. I happily tagged along, and Megan came too.

I couldn't swim and stayed still on the bank, but someone suddenly shoved me from behind. I fell into the freezing winter water and nearly drowned.

Now that I thought about it, it must have been Megan's doing.

Today, while we were painting the murals, Megan suggested burying time capsules halfway through. Everyone would write the name of their crush in the time capsule, which would be dug up only if the wish came true, so the rest of us could share in the good luck.

I thought it sounded fun, so I agreed.

Now, reborn, I'd just written the letter "J" before quickly switching to a new sheet to write Eric Grayson's name instead.

Just as Vanessa was about to curse some more, Judd walked over. She immediately winked and scurried away.

Judd looked at me, and his voice was cold and final as he declared, "Give up on the idea that we'll ever get married, Julie. I won't marry you."

I froze, and just as I was about to explain, he cut me off. "I've always loved Megan. If you step aside, I'll even invite you to our wedding for the sake of our past friendship."

Then, his expression hardened. "But if you don't agree, we don't even have to be friends."

These were words he'd never said in my past life.

When I saw the complicated look in his eyes, a thought crossed my mind.

Was he… reborn, too?

With that, Judd stared at me in silence with eyes full of warning.

Even if I knew the truth about him now, that guarded look still stung me.

In both my past life and this one, I could swear that I'd never done anything to hurt him. When he insisted on volunteering for the border project, I stayed behind to take care of his parents.

His father, Frank Garrison, seemed kind, but he was deeply patriarchal, while Eleanor was sharp-tongued and snobbish. Before Father's downfall, they were polite enough, but as soon as the trouble started, they couldn't even bother to keep up with the pretense.

I'd knelt and sobbed, begging that even if they wouldn't help, they could just let me see Father one last time. But they'd ignored all my pleas.

If Eric hadn't snuck over to check on me and keep me updated, I probably would've lost the will to live.

Just like that, I waited for Judd year after year, missing Father's funeral in the process. But in the end, I ended up seeing Judd and Megan show up at my grave, hand in hand, telling me now that I was dead, I should rest in peace and stop bothering the living.

After everything I'd done, what I received in return was the hostility and suspicion he now showed me.

I curled my lips into a mocking smile. "If you've got the time to warn me, you might as well think about how you're going to convince your parents.

"After all, you know who they'll pick between the daughter of a political officer and the daughter of some contractor out of town."

Having once been the Garrisons' daughter-in-law, no one understood Eleanor's snobbery better than I did. If Judd believed cutting times with me early in this life would make marrying Megan easy, he was dreaming.

Judd's expression darkened as he glared at me, "Megan saved my life once. That alone is enough for my parents to say yes!"

My breath hitched, and I couldn't help but laugh bitterly.

How was it such a coincidence that I saved him, too? But why did he choose to betray me in both lifetimes?

When I said nothing else, he turned and walked toward Megan.

As I watched him leave, all the memories I'd intentionally ignored in my past life started surfacing.

At some point, he stopped coming to my house for me and started showing up for Megan. On his birthdays, the first slice of cake was always handed to Megan, no matter how far she was standing.

But on my birthday, all he'd done was give me a simple fountain pen and told me to study hard. I'd been overjoyed and treasured it like a priceless gift.

Yet on the same night, he brought out a carefully wrapped velvet box and gave it to Megan, which contained an exquisite bracelet. He claimed it was an early birthday gift because she wouldn't be around for her own birthday.

…

Back then, I was naive enough to think that he was being nice to her simply because she was my cousin. Now, I realized I was just the annoying burden hovering around Megan, whom he actually loved.

"What's on your mind? I've been calling you forever."

Eric waved a hand in front of my eyes, snapping me out of my thoughts.

When he followed my gaze and spotted Judd, he curled his lip.

"You like him that much, don't you?"

"What?"

He muttered something under his breath that I didn't catch.

"Nothing," he said, laughing it off and pushing me forward. "Someone’s slacking. Don’t make me call you out."

He intentionally led me over near Judd, though his expression soured.

I sighed and looked up just in time to catch Judd's eye. He was holding the ladder steady for Megan and gave me a quick, dismissive glance before looking away.

"Megan, I'm going to grab the other colors for you."

He lifted his head and spoke gently to her as she filled in the mural.

"If you're scared, come down and wait until I'm back to hold the ladder."

She smiled and nodded. "Don't worry. I've got this, so go ahead."

I couldn't care less if he was trying to keep his distance or just bring a doting boyfriend; I just knelt down and focused on touching up the paint when Megan suddenly let out a startled cry from right above me.

Next, the heavy wooden ladder tipped toward me.

I instinctively squeezed my eyes shut and raised my arms, but the pain I braced myself for never came. When I opened my eyes, Eric had rushed over and caught the ladder.

But just before it fell, a bucket of red paint had come crashing down from above, drenching me from head to toe. I must have looked like a humiliated, dripping mess.

Megan tumbled to the ground. Since she hadn't been very high up, she only twisted her ankle and scraped her palms.

Not far away, Judd turned around. His face paled as he came sprinting over.

"Megan!"

He didn't even spare me a glance as he bent over to help her up. She leaned weakly into his arms and looked at me with tears brimming in her eyes.

Her voice was full of doubt and disbelief. "Julie… why did you shake the ladder and make me fall?"

Paint dripped from the tips of my hair, and I was stunned by her baseless accusation.

Judd frowned and glared at me with anger blazing in his eyes. "You've gone too far, Julie! This is intentional assault!"

My heart went cold. It struck me that this was what it looked like when he blindly defended someone.

I remembered a few days after we got married in my past life, I'd been attacked one night on my way home. Someone had thrown a sack over my head and beaten me up.

When I lay in the hospital bed, sobbing and demanding that Judd find the attacker, he calmly peeled an apple and impatiently said, "You need to lie low. They didn't rob you of anything, and it was probably just someone venting their anger.

"You're fine, aren't you? Stop thinking about getting revenge and stay home more. My parents might need you for something."

I'd stared at him in disbelief.

My bones had shattered in several places, and my face was swollen so badly I could barely speak, but to him, that meant I was fine.

All I'd wanted was justice and to bring the attacker to account, but now, he didn't even bother asking questions before rushing to defend Megan.

Everyone's eyes were on me.

I let the paint slide down my cheek and looked Judd straight in the eye. "Do you honestly think I'm so despicable?"

He stiffened and fell silent for a beat before Megan stumbled in his arms and piteously whimpered, "Judd, my ankle hurts so much…"

The hesitation in his eyes immediately vanished, replaced by irritation and disgust at having nearly been swayed.

He lifted Megan into his arms and coldly said, "If possible, I'd rather believe you're not. You'd better watch out."

Then, he walked toward the clinic without looking back.

I lowered my head and laughed quietly. Here I'd foolishly thought that even if we couldn't be husband and wife anymore, we still shared the bond of growing up together.

Now, it was a good thing that any love I once had for him had been worn away.

I turned around and headed home.

Judd took a step toward me, hesitated, and stopped where he was.

…

Back home, it took several washes to finally get the paint out of my hair. I sat on my bed and let out a long breath.

In two days, I'd finally be severed from the Judds.

But the next morning, Judd furiously pounded on my door. "Julie! Did you tell your uncle to call Megan home to get married?"

This was the first time I'd ever seen him so out of control after having lived two lifetimes.

"It wasn't me."

I couldn't be bothered to argue. Just as I was about to close the door, Megan rushed forward and dropped to her knees at my feet, wailing.

"Julie, I know you're still mad at me, so you can always hit me or scold me if you want. Yesterday was my fault; it had nothing to do with you!

"Please… I don't want to be a second wife to some 40-year-old man. Please have mercy on me!"

When she started banging her head on the floor, I frowned and took a step to the side. "What proof do you have that I said anything?"

I couldn't stand her dramatics anymore and decided to defend myself, but suddenly, my ears rang.

The world spun, and a burning pain exploded across my left cheek. Judd had slapped me with full force.

"I never knew you could be this vicious, Julie. I've only loved you as a sister, and just because I won't marry you, you have to destroy Megan's life!"

Holding my cheek, I looked up at him with cold eyes.

What right did Judd have to call me vicious?

Using parental orders to bury my past, he played the victim. He despised me for breaking up his "true love" even as he reaped the rewards of our marriage, eventually stepping over my bones to live out a decades-long life with Megan, never returning home.