Zoella's pov

The tequila was either working or plotting my death. Three shots in and I was 93% sure I could feel the lining of my stomach peeling, but I didn't care.

Everything was blurry in the best possible way.

I was swaying on the dance floor like a malfunctioning Roomba, my mascara already halfway down my cheeks. Somewhere in the back of my mind, a rational voice whispered, "Zo, maybe slow down a bit." But that voice sounded a lot like Liam, so I flipped it off and ordered another drink, downing it in one go.

To hell with him and to hell with Madison, too. May their genitals fall off and spontaneously combust. 

I stumbled my way into the women's restroom like a heroic drunk pirate, gripping the wall for balance. The lighting was unreasonably bright. Like surgical-table bright. 

My reflection in the mirror looked like a deranged raccoon who'd been through hell and then walked straight into Sephora.

"Mirror, mirror on the wall," I muttered to myself, squinting at my reflection. "Who's the dumbest bitch of them all?"

It had to be me, for not seeing through Madison's two-faced front all these years and Liam's selfish nature.

 I bent over the sink dramatically, bracing myself like I was about to confess to murder. "Jesus take the wheel," I muttered.

"Girl, you good?" 

A soft voice floated from one of the stalls. Then the door creaked open and out stepped a gorgeous girl in a skintight purple dress. Immediately raising a brow as she caught sight of my appearance.

I laughed hysterically, gesturing vaguely to my mascara disaster, my tequila breath, and the emotional earthquake happening in my soul. "Do I look good?"

She tilted her head, studying me. "Honestly? You look like you caught your man cheating and drank two shots to numb the pain."

My jaw dropped. "How the hell did you know that?" 

She shrugged like it was the most casual psychic read ever. "You're the third crying girl I've seen tonight. It's always either a cheating man, a cancelled bachelorette trip, or someone realizing their ex got hot. I just picked the first option." 

"Well," I hiccuped dramatically. Mine's the deluxe combo. Cheating fiancé. Best friend. My house. And get this-he didn't even use a condom."

"Ouch," she winced. "That's not heartbreak. That's a disaster."

 "Right?" I clutched the edge of the sink like it was about to whisper advice to me. "I walked in holding takeout. Thai noodles are his favorite. You know how long the wait is for those?"

"Criminal," she said with a nod of solidarity.

"And the worst part?" I sniffled. "He said-he said she was better than me. Like, in the middle of the act. Just-ramming into her like a damn hyena and giving Yelp reviews."

"Noooo," she gasped. "Girl, no. Men don't deserve seasoning."

"I KNOW." I wiped my eyes with a paper towel. "And she was my best friend. We've been inseparable since middle school. We've braided each other's hair, got into trouble together. I helped her hide her chin filler. I took her to Planned Parenthood in my mom's car, for Christ's sake!"

"Okay, she's trash," the girl said, walking over and wrapping an arm around my shoulder like we'd known each other since birth. "What's your name?"

"Zoella."

"I'm Lani. And Zoella, you are hot, heartbroken, and entirely too pretty to be crying over a man who probably uses 3-in-1 shampoo."

I burst out laughing again, tears streaming, but happy ones this time. "He does. It's the worst-smelling bottle. It says shampoo, conditioner, and body wash. All in one!"

Lani made a choking noise. "Oh, honey, not the Holy Trinity of poor hygiene."

"I wasted six years on that man."

She handed me lip gloss like a ritual offering. "You know what we're gonna do?"

"What?"

"You're going to walk out of this bathroom with your boobs perked, your eyeliner fixed, and your ego fully reinstalled. Then you're going to dance like you don't even remember what his name was. And you're going to flirt with the first hottie that says hi."

I blinked at her. "You think I can still pull?"

She leaned in, reapplying the lipgloss like a seasoned war general prepping her soldier, after which she started dabbing at my smudged mascara. "You're gorgeous. Heartbreak just gave you main character energy."

And for the first time all night, I smiled without it hurting.

~~

Hours later, Lani and I were wasted beyond repair. I had learnt that she was a hairstylist and a single mom who owned a salon around the Bronx. We were currently on the dance floor, wedged between sweaty bodies, swaying our hips to the bass of the music, when I suddenly felt the need for another shot. 

"I'll be right back!. Need to get some more shots!!" I screamed at Lani over the loud thumping music. 

She gave me a thumbs up and a wide grin before turning back to the tall, dark guy that was currently slow rocking her to the lyrics of Harry Styles' "Cinema". I laughed softly as I made my way to the bar.

I leaned against the bar as it had personally offended me, squinting at the cocktail menu. 

"Three tequila shots, please. Wait no. Two. I mean-three. I don't want to seem weak. Or maybe. Oh, I know. Do you have whiskey?" I paused, narrowing my eyes on the list again. "I feel like Whiskey girls don't get cheated on." 

The bartender gave me a look that said you good, sweetheart?  But before he could say anything, a deep voice slid in beside me, smooth, rich,h and dangerous." 

"Whiskey girls definitely get cheated on," the stranger said.

I turned so fast and nearly knocked over my drink. He was tall, broad shoulders shoved into a fitted charcoalbutton-up with the sleeves rolled to the elbow,s revealing a flame tattoo that snaked up his arm. His jawline looked like it could cut diamonds. His dark hair was slightly curled, a stray strand falling across his forehead. And his eyes? The most sinful shade of green I had ever seen, and the way he looked at me? Please, no woman deserves to be looked at like that. Like he could consume you with one look. He looked older, probably late thirties,s almost forty?

"Well damn," I said, blinking hard. "If whiskey comes with this kind of conversation, pour me a double." 

His mouth quirked slightly. "Do you always flirt this shamelessly with strangers?"

God, he was hot. I want to lick him up.

 "Only on nights when I catch my fiancé playing scream my name with my best friend," I tipped back the shot, wincing as it scorched a trail down my throat. "Cheers to betrayal."

He blinked as he gave me an assessing look.

 "I see. Rough night."

"You could say that." I reached for another shot. "Do you believe in karma?"

 "I prefer calculated revenge." 

That earned him a lopsided grin from me. "Are you single? Because you're hot." 

He chuckled under his breath. A low, rough, and warm sound that instantly sent a jolt of electricity straight to my core.

 "You're drunk," he said.

 "I'm having fun," I countered.

He didn't respond right away. Just looked at me like I was a weird little riddle someone dared him to solve.

And the n because apparently I had no self-preservation left, I reached out and placed my hand on his solid, firm,m and sinful chest.

 "If I kiss you right now," I asked, is that rebounding or reclaiming my worth?"

I saw the moment something flared in his eyes. Almost like lust? But just as soon as it appeared, it vanished as his fingers gently curled around my wrist, lifting my hand away. Not harsh but firm. 

"Get some water, whiskey girl."

And then he turned and vanished into the crowd like some emotionallywell-adjustedd Greek god with perfect timing and zero interest in my spiraling life and flirtations. 

"Buzzkill," I muttered, even though my heart was still thudding from the sheer force of his proximity.

~~~

Thirty minutes later, Lani and I stumbled outside, hands looped together, giggling like schoolgirls.

"Did you call a rideshare?" 

I looked down at my phone, which was upside down. "Uh..yes. No. Wait. Yes."

 I squinted at the screen. A black SUV. License plate something-something-7-9-4. I glanced up and spotted a black SUV with...blurry numbers. That had to be it, right?

"Bingo!" I chirped, pointing triumphantly. 

Lani narrowed her eyes. "Are you sure you'll get home safe?" 

"Yup. I'll be crashing in a hotel tonight." 

She sighed as I stumbled towards the car. "Call me when you're safe in bed."

 "I will. Good night, queen!"

 I threw her a dramatic salute and yanked open the door,

climbing into the backseat with a groan.

"Jesus, can we go? I need a hot shower and a fluffy bed like...now."

And then, like some sick joke, I heard that voice. 

Cool. Dry and annoyingly amused.

"Are you following me?"

My eyes flew open.

 Oh no. Am I dreaming?

"Whiskey guy?!"  I shrieked.

Julian's pov

"Whiskey guy?!"

 She shrieked in that sultry voice of hers. The same voice that had almost made me rethink the idea of kissing her earlier in the club when she had asked me to.

She stared at me in shock. Her drunk brain is trying to process how she ended up in my car. 

"What are you doing in my car?" I tilted my head, observing her through my rear-view mirror.

She blinked, disoriented, then gasped like she realized the gravity of her mistake. 

"No No no no no. You can't be my driver. That's illegal. You're not allowed to be hot and drive."

I arched a brow, resting my palm on the steering wheel. "You're not allowed to hijack a stranger's car."

She bit her lip as she glanced down at her phone, her cognac colored eyes widening slightly. "Oh no. I got into the wrong car." She groaned as she looked up at me.

Her lips were plump and red, complete with a perfectly shaped cupid's bow. 

As I watched her nibble on her lip, the insane urge to kiss her consumed me again, and instantly my dick hardened in response. 

Who was this girl? And could she actually be following me? 

She was beautiful, I couldn't deny that.

She had the kind of body that could bring a man to his knees. Full perky breasts, a slim waist, and the most perfect pair of legs I'd seen in a while.

I had noticed her the moment she stumbled onto the dance floor, half wild, half wrecked. She had moved like someone who wanted to forget something or someone.

Then she had flirted with me at the bar, and it had taken all of my willpower not to hoist her onto the bar and kiss those lips of hers, effectively ruining her for anyone else. 

"Do you make it a habit of stumbling into different rideshares without checking the plates?" 

"Only when emotionally devastated." She deadpanned. "And you didn't lock the door, so... that's on you."

 She paused as though she suddenly remembered something."Oh my God, I guess this is why my motherused to pray so much. To  protect me from something like this."

I couldn't help it, I laughed. Low. Rough and deep.

"So I'm the devil your mother warned you about?"

 "It may seem like it." She eyed me skeptically.

I sighed. "You should get out and find your driver."

She met my gaze in the mirror, and in that moment, I could see the mischief in her eyes. "Or...you could take me somewhere."

I knew what she was asking. But I didn't want to entertain it...Not yet.

 "Why don't I take you home? What's your address?" 

She stiffened at the word Home. "Yeah, no thanks. My ex-fiancé and my ex-best friend are currently defiling my memory on those bedsheets. I'd rather die." 

Jesus. 

Typical case of a woman being cheated on.

"People betray. That's what they do. I learned that a long time ago." I responded.

I looked at her again, really looked this time. 

Beneath the makeup, the sass, and the bad decisions, I could see the broken woman, the hurt woman, the angry woman.

"How long were you with him?" I asked before I could stop myself. 

"Six years," she muttered, then sat back and folded her arms like the question itself cracked something open. "Six years, and he still cheated on me with someone who used to borrow my dresses."

"That's cold."

 She looked away, but not before I saw the first tear slip down."It hurts. It hurts so much. I sacrificed a lot for Liam. Most especially my dreams. And he just... threw it all away." 

"You know what." I begin "There's a hotel two blocks away. Let's get you a room for the night, and tomorrow, when you feel better, you can figure out the next step. Is that cool?" 

She nodded as she wiped her eyes subtly. 

I didn't know why I offered. Hell, I didn't know why I even cared. But I felt this sudden urge to protect her.

To get my hands on Liam and snap him in two. 

Just as I made to drive, she spoke up. 

"Wait!" she shrieked, then leaned forward, her arms braced between the seats. "Can I sit up front? I usually get carsick in the back."

I cocked a brow. I didn't believe her for a second. But I nodded anyway.

She immediately climbed over like she's done it a hundred times, pulling the seatbelt across her chest with a soft click. 

The scent of her perfume hit me, and I became all too aware of how close she was. Too close. Too warm.. Too her.

"So," she said, turning towards me, her eyes glassy. "What's your name?"

"Julian." 

"Julian," she repeated, like she was tasting it. "You sound like a man who ruins lives."

"I've been known to."

 She tilted her head as she bit her lip. "Are you gonna ruin mine?" 

My cock hardened in response.

"You don't know what you're asking for." 

She studied me for a beat, then said, "I do. I want to sleep with you."

 Everything inside me stilled.

"That's the tequila talking."

"No," she said. "The tequila helped me say it. But the part that wants you? That's been screaming since I saw you."

Fuck.

This girl had no idea what she was poking at. 

"You don't want to sleep with me."

 "I do," she insisted, her voice low and breathy. "And I'm not asking for forever. I want tonight. A moment to forget the hurt. Something that reminds me I'm not broken."

"I don't do pity fucks, Kitten. If you sleep with me, it's going to be because you want to remember every inch of me, not to forget some ex."

She swallowed as her eyes darted quickly to the tent that had now formed in my pants.

The air in the car thickened as the sexual tension and weight of unspoken things settled between us.

I should have said no.

I should have driven her to the hotel, handed her a key, and walked away.

But when I looked at her lips-bruised from her teeth, parted and waiting.

I forgot how to be good. 

Just as I moved to shift the car into drive. My hand brushed against her thigh.

Zoella

I took off my heels, clutching them to my chest as I watched Julian speak with the receptionist. 

God, he was a delicious man and looked so much older.

How much older than I could he be? Twelve? Fifteen years? I would be twenty-four in a couple of months, and the man standing beside me looked thirty-eight. 

What on earth was I doing? Am I actually going to do this?

Surrender my body to a stranger for one night of  Sinful pleasure just because I was cheated on?

 As soon as the question formed in my head, my pussy clenched as I watched Julian run a hand through his hair.

 Such a bitch. My cunt was ready to go all the way. She has been panting after this man since we first laid eyes on him.

"Here you go Mr Julian, Room 11a. We'll send your order upstairs right away." 

The voice of the receptionist cut through my thoughts, and I looked over, catching the moment she leaned forward slightly, giving Julian an ample view of her bosom. 

But he paid her no mind as he turned to me, gesturing to the elevator. "After you, Kitten."

I walked ahead of him as we made our way to the elevator. He pressed some buttons, and the elevator started to ascend.

 "So, whiskey girl, what's your name?" He asked as he pinned me with an assessing gaze that made my panties dampen further. 

"Zoella." I bit my lip as I stared up at him. 

"That's a beautiful name." He breathed as he moved closer, caging me to the elevator wall.

The elevator tinged, as the door slid open to reveal a long hallway. Room 11a came into view, and he swiped the keycard, granting us access.

The hotel room was pristine. Warm lighting and crisp white sheets. I should have cared about that, but my attention was wholly swallowed by the man standing a few feet away, peeling off his jacket like a goddamn Calvin Klein ad.

Julian tossed the key card onto the table and unbuttoned his sleeves with a casualness that made my thighs press together.

I blinked out of my horny haze and headed for the minibar.

"Don't even think about it." His voice came low from behind me. A firm warning.

I paused, my fingers inches from a bottle of vodka. "One drink," I argued, peering at him over my shoulder. "It's not illegal."

He walked over to me with a dominance that made the hairs on my arms stand. "No more drinking, Kitten. You've had enough for tonight." 

I turned to him, defiant. "I can handle one more."

"No, you can't." His eyes pinned mine."You handled the last one by getting into the wrong car and trying to seduce a stranger."

I smirked. "It worked, didn't it?" 

He shook his head in amusement. "You don't need another drink. You need to eat. I ordered room service. It should be up soon." 

I narrowed my eyes. "What are you? My babysitter?"

"No." He leaned in, lips inches from mine. But ifIi were, you'd be in a hell of a lot more trouble."

Heat flashed between my thighs.

I stepped around him, brushing my shoulder against his chest deliberately. "Fine. No drink. But only because I'm curious to see what a man like you orders for a broken woman." 

"I'm sure it would be something that'll ease the pain." He said in a soothing voice.

He sounded so gentle, I almost started crying again.

"I can take care of myself, you know."

"I don't doubt that." His tone softened, but his gaze didn't stray from mine. "But tonight? You don't have to."

I blinked. Just once. And that was all it took to feel the cracks widening in my chest.

Before I could spiral, he turned, moving toward the door.

No.

I crossed the room, blocking his exit with my body before I even thought it through.

"Leaving already?" I asked, trying not to sound breathless. "You ordered me food, and now you're just gonna... leave me here?"

He tilted his head. "You said you wanted one night to forget. That doesn't mean I'm obligated to sleep with you."

I smiled, inching closer, letting my fingers graze the hem of his shirt. "No. But what if I want you to?"

"Zoella..." he warned.

I took a step forward, pushing him back a little until his back hit the door. My fingers slid up his shirt, feeling the ridges of muscle beneath. "Why does it feel like you want me to beg?"

His jaw ticked. "I don't take advantage of drunk women."

I smirked. "I'm tipsy and hurt. And maybe a little insane right now," I said with a whisper of laughter. "But I'm not unconscious. I know what I'm asking for."

"And what are you asking for?" he rasped as his gaze dipped to my lips.

"You." I reached for his belt, and he caught my wrist-firm but gentle.

"You really want to do this?" he murmured, his voice rough now, threaded with something dangerously raw.

"Yes." I moved closer until my lips grazed his jaw. "I want to forget him. I want to feel wanted."

He stared down at me, breathing hard.

Then I felt it. Him. Hard beneath his slacks, pressed against me. It gave me courage.

I reached between us again, bolder this time, tracing the outline of him.

His breath hitched.

And then I grinned. "How big is it?"

His groan was low, feral. "Zoella..."

But I just smiled up at him, teasing and unapologetic. "Just curious what I'm signing up for."

He grabbed my wrist-firm but gentle. His eyes were wild now, the control he'd fought so hard to hold onto crumbling. 

He traced a finger across my lips as I stared up at him. "If I kiss you, Zoella...If I touch you... I won't stop until I've completely ruined you for every other man."

 My knees nearly buckled.

I leaned in and pressed my lips to his jaw, whispering against his skin. "Ruin me then. Please?"

He inhaled sharply. And before my mind could register what was happening, he grabbed my butt, hoisted me u,p and crashed his lips to mine.

Shattering my world completely.