I leaned back in my seat, exhausted, but my mind wouldn't stop dragging me back to childhood.

I was three when our parents died in that lab explosion. They had been commissioned by a vampire clan to develop an affordable drug that would protect vampires from holy silver and crucifix burns. It threatened the profits of the old pharmaceutical giants, and a rival had detonated the laboratory before dawn.

When the explosion hit, Silas and Julian threw themselves over me. They were left on the brink of death-saved only because a passing Vampire King turned them just in time. I survived too, but with permanent damage. My lungs were scarred, and I'd been physically frail ever since.

Those first years after being brought to the vampire castle were the most terrifying of my life. I was at the age when human blood smells sweetest. As newly turned, bottom-tier vampires, my brothers walked me into a predatory world filled with hungry stares. Powerful old-blood vampires wanted to snatch me away as a premium blood source.

My brothers were still weak then, but every single time, they hid me inside a battered coffin and fought those monsters tooth and nail-literally.

Silas once had half his shoulder torn off. Julian nearly had his heart ripped out. But they always smiled and told me: "Don't be afraid. We'll get stronger. No one's ever going to touch you."

I was just a three-year-old human child, terrified of the darkness and the bats in the castle. So Silas and Julian slept beside me every night. These two ice-cold fledgling vampires would suppress their thirst for blood and patiently pat my back, murmuring old bedtime stories until I drifted off.

To ensure my transformation at eighteen would go smoothly, they trained with me from the time I was small.

"Come on, little princess, one more lap," Julian would say with a grin, wiping the sweat from my forehead. "Once you're stronger, the First Embrace won't hurt as much."

They'd even spent every last coin they had, scouring half of Europe, to find that legendary calming serum.

Vampire territory had no sunlight. As a child, I didn't understand vampire taboos. I saw the Caribbean on television and begged to go. I was so desperate for the sunlight of the human world, but vampires simply couldn't survive under that kind of light.

I remembered Silas's deep frown. But in the end, he just sighed: "If that's what you want, we'll find a way."

To make my dream come true, they began training obsessively to resist ultraviolet light, enduring the agony of their skin being slowly scorched away.

Now they'd finally grown strong enough to walk freely in the sun. But the person they were taking wasn't me anymore-it was Elena.

The "orphan" left behind by the human hero who had tried to save our parents in the explosion before being killed.

It took Silas and Julian fifteen years to find her in a rundown orphanage. But fate had a cruel sense of humor.

Six months after Elena was brought to the castle, I ran into the orphanage director at an off-campus restaurant-dead drunk. She grabbed my hand, sobbing and confessing: the real hero's child had died of heart disease at the age of three. The current "Elena" was just a replacement-another girl who couldn't afford heart surgery. The director had swapped her identity so my brothers would foot the bill, and maybe even grant her immortality through the transformation.

I'd stormed back to the castle in a frenzy and caught Elena rummaging through my room.

The crash was deafening. Our last family photo-the only picture with all five of us-shattered on the floor. As always, Elena had deliberately cut herself on the glass and was sitting there looking pitiful, waiting for Julian to come to her rescue.

I lost it. I grabbed her arm and screamed, "Take your lies and get out!"

That was the first time Julian ever turned on me. Even Silas, normally so reserved, looked at me with disappointment. "Alice, you're too selfish. Rein in that princess attitude."

I told them the truth. I saw the panic flash across Elena's face. She was healed now-she had no right to steal my home, to destroy my memories.

But Julian's response hit like a wrecking ball:

"Enough, Alice! Why do you have to pick on an orphan?"

"Her father was blown to pieces trying to save Mom and Dad-she's all that's left of him! You'd make up such a vicious lie just to get rid of her? Don't you feel even a little guilty?"

After that, the house went cold. A month ago, Elena struck again-she smashed the necklace I always wore, the one that held my mother's ashes. I chased her to the top of the stairs and slapped her in a blind rage. She let herself fall.

I lunged to catch her, but my weakened body betrayed me-I tumbled down the stairs after her. My arm was torn open against the hard stone steps. I was still struggling to get up and explain when-

Slap.

Julian hit me. The first time in his life.

Silas, usually the calm one, stood over me with ice in his eyes and revulsion in his voice:

"Alice, if you can't get along with Elena, get out of this house."

They carried the uninjured Elena to the hospital and left me bleeding on the cold hallway floor.

That was when I finally understood. The brother who once promised to take me to the sea, who swore to protect me forever-he was already dead.

It didn't matter anymore. It would all be over soon. I would never have to see them again or intrude on their perfect little family of three.

I went back to school and sorted through the last of my things in the dorm. There were my parents' pharmaceutical research notes-containing the preliminary formula for a drug that could free vampires from the threat of crucifixes entirely.

The next day, I was sitting on a bench with the notebook, waiting to meet Caspian, when I spotted Silas and Julian in the hallway.

Elena had dragged them to a bench not far from mine. Her bright laughter echoed through the corridor.

"Behave yourself," Silas said, ruffling her hair. "We leave for the Caribbean in a few days. You can wear any dress you want there."

Listening to them, my chest felt suffocating. Just then, a classmate called my name, and I stood up to go over. When I came back, Elena was holding my notebook, tearing out the pages one by one.

My vision went white. I rushed over and snatched it back.

Elena let herself tip backward, striking her forehead on a stone pillar with a sharp cry. Every vampire student in the hallway turned to look.

My hands trembled as I opened the notebook. It was my parents' life's work-and five years of my own research. All destroyed. The pages had been ripped to shreds, and the remaining ones were smeared with a silver-ion solution that had blackened the text beyond recognition. On top of the pile of ruined paper, she'd drawn a large, mocking smiley face in marker.

Silas was at my side in an instant, not bothering to ask a single question before erupting: "Alice! Have you lost your mind? Why did you push her?"

Julian helped Elena up, his face dark as a storm.

Caspian walked over then. He took one look at the destroyed pages in my hands, and his expression turned lethal.

"Your research notes were destroyed?" he asked in a low voice.

Silas's fury faltered. He leaned in to examine the torn paper and frowned. "That's impossible. Elena wouldn't do something like this?"

"Let's go," I said to Caspian, my voice flat. I didn't wait for Silas to finish. Strange-I should have been hysterical. I should have screamed and raged the way I had so many times before. But all I wanted was to leave.

I'd been fighting them for six months. Six months of arguments, and the outcome was always the same. Since I was leaving anyway, there was no point wasting my breath.

I walked toward the exit with the ruined notebook clutched to my chest. To my surprise, Silas followed.

His tone was as cold as ever, but there was something oddly strained beneath it: "Give me the notes. I'll try to restore them with a restoration spell."

I didn't look back. "Don't bother."

I had originally planned to give this notebook to Julian-he'd once shown a deep interest in pharmacology.

Silas seemed to sense something was off. He grabbed my arm. "Alice, what's going on with you lately?"

There was a thread of anxiety in his voice I couldn't quite place. I simply reached out and gently pushed his hand away.

We stood at an impasse for a moment before he spoke again: "Elena is still young. If she really tore it, it couldn't have been on purpose."

Of course. He was only worried I'd "retaliate" against his precious darling.

I stepped into the elevator and pressed the close button. In that moment, the part of my heart that had refused to give up finally went still, and went completely numb.

As the elevator doors closed, I said softly, "It's fine. Don't worry about it."

Julian came running-he seemed to want to stop the elevator, but it was too late.

As the elevator descended, the last thing I glimpsed was the flash of panic in his eyes.

At noon, Caspian accompanied me through the final preparations for my audience with the Vampire King. That was when Julian suddenly called.

After I picked up, there was a long silence. Just as I was about to hang up, he finally spoke, his voice hoarse: "When are you coming home?"

I hesitated. "School's been busy. I'm not coming back."

"What about tonight?" he pressed.

I was confused. "I have plans."

Another long silence.

"Today's the anniversary of us being turned into vampires," he said, awkward and halting.

I held the phone for a long time without speaking. In years past, I'd always started planning months ahead-expensive gifts, and I'd tell them that even though vampires had eternal life, every day had meaning as long as you had family. I'd even begged them, eyes brimming with tears, to turn me on that very date, so the day of our rebirth would be the same forever.

But now?

"Happy anniversary," I said flatly. "Just go ahead and turn Elena."

Caspian plucked the phone from my hand, his tone frigid. "Your birthday gifts have already been sent to the castle. I'm sure you'll find them quite 'surprising.'"

After he hung up, Caspian shook his head. "I sent over the medal of honor for your research project."

I smiled and shook my head. They probably wouldn't believe it. Or if they did, they wouldn't care.

Caspian then took me to the Vampire King's castle. He was already waiting on his throne. I lay on the bed that had been prepared in the great hall.

The King looked down at me, solemn. "Are you ready for your new life?"

I nodded calmly and closed my eyes. After the First Embrace, all former ties of blood would be severed forever.

Sharp fangs pierced my skin, and the scalding royal blood surged into my veins. A tearing agony engulfed me, and I slowly sank into unconsciousness.

The day I formally entered the Progenitor Research Center was three days after my transformation.

Caspian hosted a final banquet for all participants. As vampires, we rarely consumed human food, but that evening the table was laden with the finest blood wines and specially prepared dark berries.

After several rounds of drinks, the atmosphere in the banquet hall turned thick and somber. More than a few vampire researchers seated at the long table had tears in their eyes.

Caspian set down his goblet and surveyed the room, his voice echoing through the vast hall:

"This is your last chance to contact the outside world. Make a call to your kin or your loved ones."

"Once you enter the core laboratory, you'll be immersed in a hundred years of research stasis and pharmaceutical trials. If you want to back out, now is the time."

The soft sounds of dialing filled the room, interspersed with stifled sobs. I sat still for a long time before finally taking out my phone and opening a social media account I hadn't touched in ages.

Silas had posted an update. They'd taken Elena to the Caribbean. In the photos, the sea was a blue so vivid it hurt to look at, as if God had spilled his palette.

Elena was wearing the hand-sewn lace dress that should have been mine. She glanced over her shoulder on an endless stretch of sand, her smile dripping with sweetness.

Caspian's voice interrupted my thoughts. "Alice, make a call."

"Once you walk through those doors, who knows what century it'll be when you come out."

I gripped the phone so hard my knuckles went white. After a long hesitation, I dialed the familiar number.

But the voice that answered was Elena's-light and gloating: "Hey! Need something?"

My voice was hoarse from the transformation. "Are they there?"

Elena chirped back, "You mean the boys? They told me to answer. They're busy taking me diving right now and can't talk. Whatever you need to say, you can tell me."

In the background, I could faintly hear Julian calling out: "Elena, put the phone down! Come over here-the waves are strong!"

Elena's voice carried a sliver of undisguised triumph. That petty teenage vanity seemed almost comical to me now.

"So what did you want to say? I can pass it along."

"Oh, by the way-you left a box at home, right? Since you've moved out, there's no point keeping that old stuff around, so I had someone get rid of it. You don't mind, do you?"

My heart went completely still. I answered flatly, "Never mind."

I hung up.

When everyone had finished their goodbyes, we began walking toward the massive door. On one side lay the bustling human world. On the other, a century of solitude.

I removed my SIM card, snapped it in half, and tossed it into the recycling bin by the entrance.

I crossed the threshold without looking back. Not once.

……

After a week in the Caribbean, Silas was gripped by an inexplicable restlessness. With the Full Moon Festival approaching, Elena wheedled to stay on the island for the celebration, saying the beachside festivities were famous.

Silas's instinct was to refuse. His work was done for the year, and he should have felt at ease-but this nagging sense of absence wouldn't leave him alone. They'd only been gone seven days, yet it felt like centuries.

He was groping for an excuse to go home when, to his surprise, the usually composed Julian spoke first:

"You can come back and play anytime."

"There's urgent blood-contract business at home. I have to go."

Elena was still in high spirits and protested: "But you promised Alice there'd be absolutely no work during the family vacation!"

Julian froze, his gaze drifting guiltily toward the window.

Elena huffed and stormed out, abandoning a newly purchased plush toy.

Silas stared at the teddy bear on the floor. He suddenly remembered-it was the kind I used to love as a child.

What was I like as a little girl?

Silas tried to recall, and was horrified to find the images almost completely blurred. All he could summon were the last six months-my frantic screaming, my tearful demands to drive Elena away. And then, the version of me that grew quieter and quieter. I no longer clung to him for bedtime stories or asked about their missions. I was always "busy at school." When I crossed paths with him in the castle, my eyes were full of distance and unease.

Each time Elena broke something of mine, my reactions had evolved-from explosive rage at first, to eventual numbness. All I'd say, in a voice devoid of feeling, was: "It's fine."

Silas picked up the teddy bear from the floor. He was suddenly aware of a hollow ache in his chest, as if he'd lost something precious beyond measure.

When had he lost it? That little princess who used to tug at his sleeve, whose eyes held nothing but him-when had she disappeared?

Julian's cold voice shattered his reverie:

"I'm flying back to North City tonight."

"If you want to stay here with her, suit yourself."

Silas looked up sharply. In Julian's eyes, he saw the exact same restlessness and dread.

Almost instinctively, Silas replied, "I'm leaving tonight too."

Julian said nothing. He turned in silence to pack his things.

The next evening, their private jet touched down in North City. The whole way, Silas's temples had been pounding.

When they arrived at the castle, the great hall was cold and empty. No familiar figure anywhere. The old housekeeper came forward to take their cloaks.

Silas asked, as if it were a casual afterthought: "Alice isn't back yet?"