Koko's POV

Once again, the moon goddess had to play a trick on me. Life raised my hopes, only to send it to the ground to fall and shatter into pieces. If only I hadn't hoped for anything.

It so happened that on that fateful day, when I turned sixteen alongside my sister and many of our peers, we all eagerly waited for our wolves. We were filled with anticipation of the lycanthropy ceremony. Everyone was in high hopes, including me.

In the Red Moon pack, we shifted at the age of sixteen and mostly found our mates by the time we were eighteen. So you can imagine how joyous I was at the upcoming ceremony.

But cruel as it may seem, on that night of the ceremony, I watched my sister and all our other peers shift to their wolves under the blood red full moon at midnight.

I waited for my wolf… I waited in shame.

My wolf never came. It was a gut-wrenching experience for me, I walked back home with my head bowed and cried all the way home. What have I done to be ill-fated?

As expected, Donna was at the door to welcome my sister and to shower me with her insults again. Luckily for her, the goddess gave her the right to keep insulting me.

"I always knew you were a curse! This just confirms it. If you were not an evil child, you would have shifted like the rest of your peers. This is your punishment for killing your father." She spat at me, before locking me in the basement.

I didn't care anymore… I felt abandoned, hurt and filled with bitterness but I had no choice. I have nowhere to go. I spent three days in the darkness without food or water, before she released me.

Six months later, I shifted into my wolf. I guessed I should be happy now, right? It should have been a thing of joy for me, but it only led to more shame and disgrace.

That was because as usual bad luck always clinged to me. I got my wolf but it wasn't a wolf, but more like a baby goat! My wolf was very small and my comparison is the perfect description for it.

It was weak and frail, with a pale brown colour, and it never spoke to me. I guess we are on the same page. We were cursed according to my mother.

Yet again, I know I would become an object of ridicule amongst the entire pack. Everyone and anyone who wanted to, bullied me at their will. And that was because it was now certain that my wolf was so small that if I ever picked a fight, I would be chewed up without a sweat.

"Weak and pathetic! Why are you still alive?" My mother spat at me one fateful day.

I was so bittered that I responded to her." Are you really my mother? Why do you hate me so much? Why!"

"Did you just scream at me, you worthless weregoat! You are a goat! That's why you have a goat instead of a wolf…"

"Mother!"

"Don't you dare call me mother after you killed your father! You are a curse and a disgrace! I am sending you to the palace first thing in the morning!"

She started screaming at me, I was so ashamed that I ran away into the thick forest opposite our house.

On getting there, I started crying loudly. I knew I won't be heard by anybody so I cried to my heart's content. The tears that I had been holding in for a long time started falling heavily.

"Are you okay, young lady?" I heard a voice from behind. His scent was so unique and refreshing. It felt like drinking water from a spring.

"I… I am fine. I just got something in my eyes." I quickly lied lowering my head. I could sense he was a stranger because his scent was not like anyone living in my pack.

"Got something in your eyes and you are bawling at the top of your lungs?"

"I am fine. It stings… that's why I was bawling my eyes out so that the tears might have a healing effect." I lied again, through my teeth. I never knew I could lie like this though.

I heard a soft chuckle from him and my mind skipped a beat. That chuckling sound.. It was almost like that night I got lost. I wanted to raise my head, but I dare not.

"Raise your head let me see you." The voice commanded.

"I can't," I replied weakly.

"You can't?" He asked me back.

Before I could say anything, he was already in front of me. He raised my chin up gently and looked at my face. I wanted to close my eyes, but somehow I couldn't.

"Isn't this the face you are hiding? Are you afraid because you are different?" He asked.

I was surprised he wasn't cursing or feeling angered by my appearance.

Then I heard him say." You are different because you are unique. The Moon goddess would surely give you someone that would treasure you. Keep hoping."

Why does this sound familiar? It was too dark that night so I couldn't see the person's face clearly. Could he be the same boy?

As I was lost in my thoughts, I didn't know when he left. Where did he go? I couldn't even ask his name!

Though I was disappointed, I stuck to his word and hoped on the moon goddess sending me the one to cherish me.

**************

With every passing day, I held on to hope - just as he had told me. I made it a habit to hold on to good things that could come, it was what kept me alive each day.

Even though I might be down on most times but trust me, I was a very optimistic person. I believed in fate and the Moon goddess even though she had failed me several times.

So I held onto yet another hope. I chose to believe in the word of that stranger. I believed everything will be fine once again. There was a glimmer of hope.

My mate.

I believed that I would find my mate once I was eighteen.

He would love me and he would be my friend. My mate would protect me and stand up for me when I was being picked on, he would shield me like male mates do, and he would never let anyone hurt me.

I believed my mate would take me away from my mother and sister and he would keep me safe with him, nurture and cherish me and I would never have to worry about anything else again.

That was my hope. The hope that kept me going till I would finally meet him. I believe he would love me regardless of everything.

I should have learnt that it was futile to hope. I should have learnt my lesson from the incident of my wolf, but still I held onto that tiny bit of hope. Futile to hope in the so-called Moon goddess that I trusted even after all the ill fate.

The moon goddess had always been so cruel to me, I was sure she hated me as well, I should have understood this and not expected anything from her.

But I didn't, I allowed myself to believe that I deserved a happy ending, for all that I had gone through.

I was wrong. Finding my mate was not my happy ending but the start of my real anguish. It was the start of the real pain and that was when I would know that the pains of all these years were nothing.

It was a new dawn of never ending suffering.

Koko's POV

After that night, I stayed clear of Gad. The hatred and hidden threat I felt in his aura was enough to shake my supposed courage. My hope shattered once again.

But then, I could understand why he didn't want me. I mean, how can a guy like him want a girl like me? I was afterall an ugly, weak and cursed girl who was obviously hated by her family. And supposedly caused the death of her father.

Gad was the hottest and most eligible bachelor in all of the Red Moon pack. He was loved by every female wolf in and out of the Pack. Even the neighbouring packs with eligible female wolves drooled over him.

The most beautiful of them, all lined up at his feet. Even the female alphas fight to get his attention. That's how hot he was. Even my sister who still remained the golden girl of the pack, was dying to be with him.

There was no way he could agree to settle for a female like me; the laughing stock of the pack and the known cursed girl.

I went about my duties quietly and calmly, without speaking to anyone and no one really wanted to speak to me except maybe to send me on errands.

Even the omega females in the pack rejected me. I was stuck up as a lonely wolf who was even lonelier than a lone wolf. I was avoided like a plague. And referred to as a cancer of the pack.

I accepted my fate and decided to play along with Gad's decision. I kept my mouth shut about ever meeting my mate. But somehow I felt my sister's hatred magnifying from that day. Could she have known?

I avoided Gad's chambers and every other place I knew I was likely to find him in, whenever I cleaned. I didn't want to continue wallowing in my self pity.

The hate in his eyes that day was still embedded in my mind and I did not need to see it a second time…or ever again. I was at ease though, knowing he didn't reject me. Maybe someday, he will accept me. I just have to avoid him for now.

However, fate had to be cruel towards me once more. How was it that the goddess wouldn't let me live in peace, but refused to find a way to lead me to my death?

I was sure that I would be able to find solace in hell because that was the best place for me compared to what I have grown to face every single day.

I was sure the Moon goddess wouldn't give me a place by her side or in her beautiful celestial kingdom. She hated me too much to care about that.

Wallowing again in my thoughts, I carried a basket of wet clothes I needed to spread on the lines in the courtyard so that they could dry. I walked swiftly, eager to be done with this assignment, so I could move over to the next.

The faster I finished the work assigned to me, the faster I could get some sleep before night, when I would be tossed out of my bed and sent to the dark corridor to lie down.

The maids who were my roommate didn't like to have me in the room, something about my curse again. So they always find excuses to toss me out. I never mind, even though I had to face cold and rain most times.

I walked to the courtyard, and approached the first empty line. That was when I saw something that sent my body quivering in shock and… bitterness. The basket fell from my hands in shock and my mouth was agape at the sight before me.

The rubber basket tore from the effect of the fall and the clothes I had spent all morning washing, fell on the grass. But, it wasn't the clothes I was worried about at that moment, it was what I had seen.

I now realized why my sister was so abnormally harsher towards me. So this was the reason. There before me was a sight I never dreamt I could see yet, even though I knew it would be inevitable.

Gad and Hanola, my mate and my twin sister, stood beside a tree. Hanola leaned with her back against the tree, while Gad stood in front of her.

They were locked in a tight and erotic embrace, while they shoved their tongues into each other's mouth. Gad's left hand gripped her breasts firmly as my sister moaned in ecstasy.

That was when my basket fell from my hands. And the sound of commotion caused them to stop.

Hanola was the first to look at me, she glared at me with irritation, before rolling her eyes. Somewhere in my heart, I knew my sister would take him away from me, but I refused to acknowledge it.

She always had her eyes on Gad and prided herself as the future Luna! How could I have forgotten?

I looked for tears, believe me, I looked for tears, but I found none. The only thing that stayed with me was the sore feeling of pain and loss, the one I was supposed to be used to.

Gad was mad, very pissed, that I had interrupted his hot makeout session with my sister. He took his hands off Hanola and walked speedily towards me. That same hateful glare he always had in store for me, was clearly displayed on his face.

I should have ran, I should have turned on my heels and ran until I was out of sight, but I couldn't. My limbs were frozen in shock and pain as I stood transfixed to the floor.

Both my arms were numb. That was why I couldn't shield my face from the slap that landed across my right cheek, sending my face to the left. I could swear I almost lost a tooth!

I saw flashes of white after the slap followed by deep red, it took more than sixty seconds for my vision to stabilize. His palm felt like hot iron that was burned into my cheek. I felt the sting on my face…and in my heart.

"Stupid bitch." Gad growled above me.

And I heard Hanola's footsteps approaching me. I wanted to press my hand to soothe the pain on my cheek, but my arms wouldn't move. It had became numb as well, I guess. Maybe due to fear or pain, I don't know.

I stood straight and looked Hanola dead in the eyes first, because I was too much of a coward to look at Gad. Hanola, who was taller than me, felt insulted by my stare.

Another nerve wracking slap fell upon my left cheek, and sent my face hurling towards the right. Yet again, the humiliation ate deep into my already ailing heart.

"Just who do you think you are to look at me like that?!" She screamed at the top of her voice.

Now, my tears released themselves and rushed freely out of my eyes. I couldn't take it anymore.

"Hanola… what have I ever done to you to deserve being hated?" I managed to ask.

"How dare you call my name? You cursed thing! I can't believe I shared the same womb with you! You have the guts to ask what have you done, when you are the reason I have no father! Killer!!" She spat at my face.

Before I could respond to her, I heard Gad trying to pacify her. "Baby, she doesn't matter. She's just a stupid lowlife..."

"No your grace. I need to put her in her right place. Let me put her where she belongs!" She snapped, then turned back to me.

There were no words in the dictionary to explain the sorrow I felt. Watching my own flesh and blood, the person I had shared a womb with for nine months, humiliated me for no reason.

"We might have been sisters, but that has never, and will never make us equals. Haven't you looked at yourself in the mirror? Do we look equal? How dare you talk back to me?" Hanola started with her degrading remarks.

"Remember who you are. You are an ugly duckling, an unwanted cancer! A curse with a cursed wolf. You had better know your place before opening that shitty hole you call a mouth."

"So, when I'm standing in front of you, you look down at your feet when talking to me, do you understand?!"

I stayed quiet and stared at her. Was she really telling me to bow to her? Who was she to talk to me like that? I am the mate of Gad! I am likely to become Luna, not her!

"Why should I bow to you? Who are you to demand that from me?" I snapped.

Then in a raised voice I decided to voice it out." I am Gad's mate! You don't have the right to talk to me like that!"

And that was the last straw that pissed Gad off. He suddenly turned to me and snapped with a terrifying aura.

I knew I had made the biggest mistake of my life.