-- Gideon Dunkerson's POV --

"Serra, My Luna..." I whisper with such heavy feelings.

I have been searching for her for over a year. When I lost her, I lost it too. I didn't know then that losing her would spiral me into an acute grief that would render me invalid. It was not until an old monk suggested traveling and getting away from the place we'd been together that I was able to stand up on my feet again. No, not stand up, but crawl and try to survive. However, it teaches me sympathy, and I gain the courage to continue my life for her.

"I didn't want to be the same average-looking Luna," she starts, her voice soft. She is what I remembered her to be. "Yet you deny that to me as well."

"I am sorry," I whisper, and I can't help but reach up to her cheeks. I caress them, not quite believing that she's back. Every time I dream, it's her face that I see. "You really are back...."

"Can you still take me as your Luna? Even if I lied? Even if I used glamour to hide myself?"

"Oh, Serra..." I whisper. She's always been like this, constantly second-guessing herself, so no one realizes how amazing she truly is, until they watch her use her magic. "I will always take you back. You are still my Luna. No one replaced you."

My mother asked me to take a new Luna, but I just can't take another while I am still grieving for her. I did have other women in my bed, but those are for duty. Even without a Luna, I still need to sire heirs.

She holds my hand that's on her cheeks and closes her eyes. "I returned because I am afraid you will take another Luna," she says, trembling. "I don't want to admit it, but I can't allow that. I still love you, Gideon."

My chest hurts and I breathe in relief. She still wants and loves me! Despite all the pain that she suffered from me! My heart swells with love for her, and I want to smother her with my kisses. This time, I will love her properly.

I take her hands and envelop them in mine. I press my lips on her fingers with a longing passion, desperate to show her my devotion. I will worship her with my every breath.

"I couldn't say this to you before, but I love you too, Serra. And oh god, I am sorry for everything I've done to you. I will make up for all the pain I caused you."

She smiles, and her eyes shine with tears. "I accept your apology, Gideon. I will always accept you."

Then she hugs me tightly, burying her face in my chest. I squeeze her tight and kiss the top of her head.

"Let's start anew," I say, my voice trembling, the same way hers is.

I embrace her. She finally found her way back to me. From now on, she is mine, and I am only hers. We will be exclusive to each other and this time, I will never let go of her hand.

******************

People call me a man of great power with many concubines. However, with Serra's return, I don't need them. I don't want Serra to think she's not enough for me because that is false. As long as I have her, I no longer need any other woman. I learned that now.

I glance at the door. I want to be with her. However, with her abrupt return, her previous room is being cleaned up and prepared. At the same time, I also asked for a couple's room to be cleaned up. I want us to stay in the same room... Only if she allows it. When I lost her, we were sleeping in different rooms. I sleep in the Lycan King's room with all my other women while she sleeps in an ordinary guest room, the closest one to the library.

"Are you certain, King Gideon? I thought Mage Serra was barren?" one of my advisors asks.

"That's just a baseless rumor," I say.

It is a rumor that's spread out by my kin, so she will lose her position. Being together, I know it ain't true. She got pregnant, but she got a miscarriage a week after she discovered me bedding another woman. I didn't tell anyone, and she didn't want to say it to other people either. Her pride won't allow her to confess that her husband, that she is so proud of, is cheating on her.

I clench my jaws as her pained expression surfaces in my head. I was too stupid to hurt such a woman!

"All the other concubines will leave the palace except those currently pregnant. After they give birth to my child, they need to leave as well. Also, tell them that they will be well-compensated and that, I will provide for the child."

My other advisers complain as I expect them to. Some of these concubines are their relatives, and they are nurturing the idea of taking the Luna position from Serra, especially when she left the politics to my mother - I was useless then. Not anymore though. I've already learned. I can protect her in places she cannot do herself. And Serra can take care of all things related to magic and military.

And so, after the meeting, I rise and walk to the hall. I want to see Serra again, to talk to her and ask what she's been doing the past year.

Standing outside her door, I push it open. Serra is organizing her things. Upon my entry, she looks up. Same as before, her face is bright every time she lays her eyes on me. She wanted my love then. Now, I will give it all to her. And so I open my arms, and she steps into my embrace. I take a sniff of her, my dear, sweet Luna.

"Gideon," she whispers against my chest.

"What is it?" I ask, my fingers twirling around the strands of her hair. It's shorter now. When we're together, she always wears it long, with her curls cascading behind her. Every time I see it, all I can think of is how it becomes tangled every time we make love, like a cocoon that envelops me in its warmth.

She pulls back, a smile on her face. "I want you to meet someone."

"Who is this 'someone'?" I ask, my hands going to her face again. Beautiful. I am a good five inches taller than her, so I can easily touch her soft, brown hair, which she always described as plain and common.

She holds my hand and says, "You know him already, but I'd like you to meet him again."

Him? I frown as she pulls me outside of her room again. It's not a lover, right? Because she won't return to my side if she has another lover. She won't tell me that she still loves me if her heart belongs to another.

Turning into a corner, I face Prince Caius Liddicoat, second son to the current Vampire King of Liddicoat. My frown deepens, "Prince Caius," I say. "I didn't know you are visiting. I hope my aides was able to provide you with the necessary comforts?"

A smile appears on his face. "I'm fine, King Gideon. More than that, I am honored that you still remember my name."

Of course, I won't forget him. I can't stand him. A year ago, I was already wary of him. He always teased Serra, too often for it to be just a friendly banter. Once, I saw him console her, and somehow, his presence seemed to provide her some measure of comfort. A comfort that she needed because I was hurting her.

"No, I should be the one honored. I haven't organized any fanfare to welcome you. I have no advance notice either. So, this is pretty much a surprise visit from you."

He laughs a bit and nods. "Yes, I know. I apologize for the surprise."

He looks at Serra and then back at me. "Serra?" he asks.

He is calling her too familiar too! I turn my attention to her.

"Gideon, my love, I want you to meet Prince Caius again," she starts.

I am relieved that she calls me 'her love' but is formal with him. Same as before, she keeps all men, especially handsome, unmarried ones, at arm's length. Prince Caius was the only one persistent enough to befriend someone as awkward and dense as her.

"He is the one who saved me from death three years ago," she explains. "And so, can I please ask for your permission to let him stay for a while?"

How long is 'for a while'? I'd like to ask, but instead of voicing it out, I say, "Sure, anything for you."

Despite the doubt, when she kisses my cheek, my heart swells with happiness again. It doesn't matter. She is back, and she is still mine. Surely, a prince of another kingdom won't be able to take her attention from me. Besides, she just told me that she still loves me. And Serra is never the one to confess her love if it ain't true.

My dreams have always been about the pain of my years of training. I spent an entire year in the Liddicoat's family house. It is where their family library stands, underneath that big, old house. And there, I scour ancient tomes and scrolls, learning more spells that might come in handy when my quest for revenge starts.

In my dream, my fingers will dance over different parchments, tracing the arcane symbols and incantations of long-lost spells. Caius also provided me with seers, monks and alchemists. And because they are being blackmailed by the vampire prince, they are forced to share their techniques with me - all poultices, elixirs and enchantments.

But handy techniques and skills are not the only things I peruse. I also worked on my skills of using powerful and potent spells, like that powerful sleeping spell.

'Revenge is worth any price,' I will say to motivate myself, when things have become so hard.

And then, my dream will transport to an island, where I spent another year of training - to make my body more durable and more resistant. There, I would summon different elements at the behest of Caius' master, who also became my master.

The old man's name is Vincere, who would always tell me that I should learn to properly control my magic during combat, not just to unleash it on great bursts. He always said that it's not the only way to overwhelm an opponent.

In the first week, I would always tell him that 'Control takes time' and things like 'Time is a luxury I don't have.'

Which the old man will answer with a, 'Rome wasn't built in a day, and neither will your mastery be achieved overnight.'

Or sometimes, it will be a 'You are more than your scars, Serra. You are a force to be reckoned with.'

It all depends on the current situation. Like for example, during my final task, I was surrounded by rogue vampires and almost died, because Vincere never even considered helping me.

Still, on the sideline, he is chanting the words, 'Adapt, survive, conquer, Serra.'

I wonder how Caius had grown into a happy-go-lucky man with Vincere as his master?

********************

My eyes flutter open at the first rays of sunlight that are piercing through the cracks of the window shutters. I groggily sit up, my head throbbing with a dull ache. It's another very long, but familiar dream.

As I stretch, I catch sight of myself in the small but elegant mirror on the wall.

Disfigured. Twisted. Unrecognizable.

As I stare at my face, I see that it's getting worse. I am getting uglier by the second. Why?!

My skin is being further marred by angry scars and puckered burns, and then it starts to crisscross over my face like a grotesquely growing spider web. I raise a trembling hand to touch my cheek and I feel the rough texture beneath my fingertips.

The sight makes my stomach churn, bile rising in my throat. I can't help when a shrill scream escapes my mouth.

And then I wake up - really wake up to my reality. I rise up and stand in front of the mirror. I heave a sigh of relief when I see that my reflection is still well-hidden by glamour.

These dreams, they're not leaving me soon. No. Not until I take my revenge!

There is a knock and then the door opens. Gideon, my fuck-up husband, comes in. He looks worried as his eyes go to my bed. And not finding me on the bed, his eyes scour the room until his gaze settles on me. A sigh of relief escapes his lips at the same time that his shoulders relax.

"There you are..." Gideon whispers. "Are you okay? I heard a scream."

I look at Gideon, his eyes are clouded with worry for me, and I stop myself from snorting.

"Just a nightmare, that's all," I tell him, trying to keep my voice steady. My heart is still racing from the dream, and the grotesque scars are still fresh in my mind.

"I'm okay now," I add, brushing a strand of hair out of my eyes and forcing a smile.

He frowns, not convinced, but nods anyway. Perhaps it's because he doesn't want to push it further, or else he is going to bring up all his wrongs that he won't be able to apologize for in this lifetime.

Instead, Gideon approaches and wraps his arms around me in a comforting embrace. He then places a soft kiss on my forehead - a gesture that feels so misplaced and hollow in everything he has done to me.

"You should go back to bed, Serra," Gideon murmurs into my hair. "It's not yet time for breakfast."

I shake my head, pulling away from him with a small smile that doesn't quite reach my eyes. "I can't sleep anymore."

I walk over to the window and pull open the shutters, allowing the faint morning light to stream in. The sight of the sparkling dew-kissed grass is beautiful, it always is, but it stirs no joy within me... at least, not anymore.

"Serra..." he begins, his voice a low rumble. "About the past. I apologize for all the wrongs I've done to you. Our relationship might not be the same as before, but I promise you that I will treat you better now."

I shift my attention to him again. Of course, our relationship won't be the same as before. I'm not as gullible and stupid as before. This time, I will have the upper hand.

"I..." I start, but paused to pretend that I am hesitating. "Your words are unexpected," I say, being careful with each word.

"I know, but I-"

"It's fine," I say, raising my hand to stop him. "When I planned to return, I... I have already decided to forgive you."

Gideon's eyes lit up. He moves closer to me and takes a hold of my hand.

"Serra," he whispers, his voice filled with gratitude. "As we restart, there might be lingering resentment in your heart... But I will do my best to rebuild the trust between us."

What 'trust' between us? There is nothing like that before, and definitely nothing now. Still, I nod and give him a faint smile.

"To start anew, we need to let go of the past. We both deserve a chance to move forward."

I almost vomit in disgust at the words I uttered. I may be unaware when people are taking advantage of me, but I am not that stupid!

He squeezes my hand gently, his expression softening. "Thank you, Serra. I promise to prove myself worthy of your love."

Then, he pulls me towards the chair and makes me sit. "There's also one other thing," he starts. "I've sent my concubines away - all but the pregnant ones."

If Gideon is really serious about treating me well, sending his concubines away is the bare minimum. I know that now, but if I were the same Serra as before, this piece of news would have made me feel especial. But now, it did nothing to quell my need for revenge.

"Children, huh..." I whisper. "We don't have one..."

"We can have one, if you like." He kneels before me and takes my hands in his again. "When I lost you, I needed to sire heirs, but now that you're back, we can try again."

It was not so long ago that I was desperate for a child, but now, every thought of it fills me with hatred, remembering how the child in my belly died due to all the stress and pain of being his wife.

"I can't... right now," I answer in a small voice. "I don't want my child to get embroiled in an inheritance war, especially with all your other concubines..."

He squeezes my hand. "They won't be!"

'They?' Don't tell me he plans to have more than one child with me?! The thought alone repulses me!

"Only your child and mine will be able to inherit the throne." He takes a deep breath and adds, "You are my only Luna, Serra. And soon, you will be my only Queen."

He presses his forehead on the back of my hand, and so my eyes harden as I look down at his crouching form between my knees.

"And what of your other children?" I ask, stopping myself to add if he will abandon them, now that he has no use for them - just as he did to me.

"They won't be forgotten," he says, inching closer to bury his face in my stomach. "But for our future children, whatever it takes, I will make sure that our child shall be yours and mine alone. They won't be used or manipulated by anyone, but they will still inherit my throne."

The sincerity in his words surprises me, but then again, this is the same man I once loved deeply. The man who once shattered my heart so completely that I am reduced to the person I am today.

And so, I push at his shoulders. I am becoming uncomfortable in the way he holds me close to him.

"Okay," I whisper. "Let's start anew, Gideon."

"Yes, Serra. A new beginning," he murmurs, lingering for a moment before he lifts himself up. His eyes find mine, his gaze burning with an intensity that I want him to hold as long as possible - all for the success of my plans.

*************

I stand in front of the door of the grand dining hall, dressed in an elegant blue gown that Gideon had prepared for me. I touch the skirt of the gown. Before, Gideon never chooses my dresses for public functions. He only ensured that my dresser was full of dresses that I could choose from.

And it's not because he was giving me freedom... It was because he doesn't care enough if his poor wife embarrasses herself in social events. In fact, it will be advantageous to him. Putting me in a bad light is beneficial for his search for a new wife - someone who is voluptuous, flawless and beautiful.

The only one who cares enough is his mother, who teaches me all there is to know on how to face the Dunkerson nobles.

I take a deep breath, and now, I am invited for lunch with him and his mother, the current Queen Marinella Dunkerson, who is holding the position until her son finds a new Queen. And so, as I take a deep breath, I wonder what the Queen is thinking about my sudden return.

Gideon takes my hand and gives it a reassuring squeeze, reminding me that I am beside him. I look up at him and smile. He smiles back and I almost frown at the way his happiness radiates from his entire being. It annoys me, and so I look away and focus my eyes on the door of the dining hall.

"This lunch is too formal," I comment.

Before, I can have lunch with Marinella even in our private rooms. It was all informal, too comfortable, and something that made me believe that she cared about me, too. Seems like that was never the case. She only cared for one thing - her precious son.

"You've been gone for a while," he defends. "And this will be the only time we will be formal about this. The next ones won't be like this."

Only time.

That's what it is. He had never enjoyed joining me and Marinella for our meals before.

The door opens and we walk inside. There is only one table in the room, but it is filled with an array of delicious dishes. Despite myself, the aroma makes my stomach grumble with hunger. Back in Liddicoat, I was never able to enjoy eating because I never grew used to their food. But then, what should I expect? Vampires don't share the same taste buds as Lycans or human mages.

As Gideon and I approach Queen Marinella, she greets me with a, "Welcome back, Serra." It is coupled with a smile that doesn't reach her eyes.

I smile back, hoping that my smile is more authentic than hers is. Now, I am certain that she is doubting the true intention of my return.

"It's good to see you again, Your Majesty," I reply politely as Gideon pulls out my chair for me - another unfamiliar gesture from him. He never once did it for me.

As we start our meal, Queen Marinella strikes up a conversation with me. She asks us about my trip from Liddicoat and how I am settling back into the Dunkerson palace. I answer her questions honestly, trying to keep a neutral tone and not reveal too much about my relationship with Caius Liddicoat - only painting him as a charitable second prince.

But as the conversation continues, Marinella suddenly asks, "Why did you come back to Dunkerson kingdom, Serra?" Her voice is gentle yet laced with suspicion. "And how did you really survive that tragedy?"

"I missed this place," I say without hesitation, skipping her last question, and hoping she would believe the lie. I also glance at Gideon and smile shyly. "And my life is here," I add.

Queen Marinella raises an eyebrow at my response before turning her gaze towards Gideon, who pauses from eating and is smiling so brightly. I feel like I will get blinded by him soon if he doesn't stop feeling this happy. His emotions are so open that I wonder how I was never able to notice his cheating before.

I look down at my food as a terrible answer crosses my mind - I was so deeply infatuated and in love with him, that is why I was so blinded. I was so foolish to give all my love to the wrong person.

But before I can dwell on these thoughts any longer, Gideon interjects, "I am surprised at her return as well, but I am very pleased to see you again, Serra, my wife."