Six long weeks since that fateful night.

To my dismay, I am still alive.

I haven't seen Dean nor Holden since I gave them the soul destroying news.

I go to work, do my job, return home and huddle up on the sofa until I fall into abyss.

Sleep is my only friend. It blocks out the pain.

Why can't the wolf spirits let me die?

Today, it's just another boring day. I arrive at work to start dealing with meetings and clients, making calls and typing up letters like always.

I sip on a strong black coffee while typing an email reply, when my stomach churns.

Eurgh!

I leap up from my seat, sprinting full pelt to the ladies bathroom, throwing myself at the toilet. I vomit violently, so bad that my eyes stream with pain.

That's how the rest of the day continues; working and throwing up.

I have no idea what's going on.

Wolves don't get sick!

We have an unusually high immune system, so no human bugs or viruses effect us.

What could it be?

Hmm...

Mr Fray sends me home after the fourth time I rush to the bathroom.

He says I should take the rest of the week off--only two days--to recover from whatever illness I have.

So here I am, snuggled up on the sofa with my duvet. The television blares out mindless junk.

Boring!

I haven't been able to keep any food down and it feels vile.

My stomach is empty, but it continued to churn with nausea.

A knock at my door forces me off the sofa, the duvet still huddled around me as I feel freezing.

I slowly wander out to the front door.

I open it to see a guy--he must be in his mid twenties--and by his scent, he was a rogue wolf!

Shit.

"Oh, hello dear Liz! God I missed you girl! Wow you don't look so good!" The guy says in a friendly way, a sweet smile on his face.

I take in his features, feeling a familiar pull to him.

Then it hits me. "Soul!?" I gasp.

He grins, nodding. "You remember me!" He exclaims.

Soul was a childhood friend from school. He was the only guy I didn't sleep with at school.

He was lovely, caring, supportive and he didn't judge me.

I squeak, drop the duvet and slam myself into his arms, wrapping mine around his neck, squeezing him hard. "Oh Soul! You've turned up at the best time, but why the heck do you smell like a rogue?" I breathe him in.

Soul chuckles humourlessly. "I was kicked out of my pack up north. I've been rogue for 8 months."

I am shocked! Why the hell was a guy like this a rogue?

"Oh Soul! Come in! Come in!" I grin, yanking his hand.

"So... Miss Knight! Who knocked you up? Was it your mate?"

My eyes widen. "What?"

"You're err... shit, you don't know! I could smell it the second you opened the door!" Soul gasps, his hand over his mouth. "I'm pregnant?" I whisper, beyond shocked.

Soul just nods innocently.

Once we reach the living room, I slump down on the sofa. "Holy mother!"

Soul laughs. "So, tell me all about it! I wanna hear what's been going on."

I take a deep breath, and start to fill him in.

~*~

"Holy shit! So two mates and one of them is the father!? I can't believe you've turned into a hussy! Oh Lizzie!"

I smirk at Soul. "I wasn't a hussy? I thought I always was!"

He grins at me cheekily. "Well, you weren't that bad. You only had one guy on the go at once."

I sigh, and shake my head rapidly, trying to force my smutty past out of my head.

"So, Miss Knight. There was a reason why I came... umm..." Soul mumbles nervously.

"What is it?" I ask softly, stroking his hand, hoping to be encouraging.

Capturing my hand in his, Soul turns his entire body towards me and stares into my eyes. "I love you Lizzie. I always have. I want to be with you and I will do anything to have you in my arms."

My jaw drops, I can't believe Soul is declaring his love for me after all I've told him. After finding out I was pregnant! After hearing about my mate problem.

I can't say I wasn't happy about it. I've always had feelings for Soul. He was the only guy I hadn't slept with. I knew I loved him and I couldn't lose him. I knew sex would ruin us.

"Soul... you're willing to take me on with all this..." I point to my belly. "...baggage?"

Soul looks at me sympathetically. "That just makes me love you even more!"

My heart pounds against my chest, and my head swims.

'Let him in!' My wolf begs. 'If our mates don't want us, we still deserve to be happy!'

I smile at my wolf's words, and look up into the jade green eyes that belong to Soul Valentine.

"Yes!" I whisper, "I've always loved you Soul. Despite my pain because of my bastard mates, I want you."

In a shockingly quick move, Soul wraps his arms around me, pulls me up and spins me around the living room.

I giggle loudly, and hug him back.

Once I'm safely back on my feet, both of us breathless, Soul's eyes darken and he slides one of his hands down to my hip. The other cups my face, gently stroking my cheek, before moving in. "I've been wanting to do this since I was 13..." He murmurs before planting his lips on mine.

I have to say, it really isn't like kissing Dean or Holden, but it's still intense. His kiss is filled with love, passion and need.

I melt into his body, feeling cherished and relaxed.

Soul's tongue eases into my mouth, allowing his warm manly flavour spark at my taste buds.

My arms snake up, and I grip onto his shoulders, squeezing at his toned muscles, a moan leaving my lips.

That night all we do is kiss. I have told Soul that I want to take things slow due to our friendship and my current situation.

So I'm pregnant?

Is it Dean's or Holden's baby?

Should I tell them?

Do they have the right to know after walking out?

Why didn't my depo injection work?

I better see my doctor as soon as possible!

I will call them first thing in the morning.

I'm going to have to tell work too.

All these thoughts cloud my head as I drift off to sleep in Soul's arms.

~*~

"Don't worry, dear. There doesn't seem to be anything wrong with your baby. The depo doesn't always work on wolves. It goes from 97% to 88% effective with our metabolism, healing rates and high immune systems, as well as our raised temperatures."

"Also, due to your shifter genes, your pregnancy will be 6 months rather than 9. You can't shift until after having the baby or you could endanger the baby's life." My pack doctor--Dr Jules--informs me of all the stuff I need to know.

"So, when is my baby due?" I ask, smiling.

I was having a baby!

"Errrr... let's see." Dr Jules murmurs, looking at her pregnancy calendar. "Ahh yes... oh wow! It's going to be a Christmas baby!"

My eyes widen. "What? Christmas Day?" I ask.

Dr Jules nods with a smile. "25th of December."

"Wow!" I breathe, then smile.

Eeek!

So I'll be having a Christmas Day baby, and a wonderful supportive boyfriend who is going to help and be by my side throughout the entire thing.

I may not have my rightful mates, but I'm not going to sit here and wallow anymore!

I've done it for too long and Soul has shown me how strong I actually am.

I can do this, and I will!

Now I know everything is ok with my pregnancy, I can take our relationship to the next level.

We have been dating a month, and I am dated at 12 weeks pregnant.

I am so excited to go home and tell Soul how it went!

Lets go!!

(-Dean P.O.V.-)

I do the same as I have done for the past 10 long weeks. I sit in my office at work, snapping at anybody who dares to get on my bad side.

I feel so low. My brain has turned to mush and my heart has a deep fissure right down the middle.

My wolf hates me. He spends his time snapping at me and shouting profanities in my head.

I know it's my fault.

I'm too proud. I have an image to uphold and the situation I've been put in is likely to ruin my status.

Oh for heavens sake!

Why didn't Lizzie know I was her mate when we started our 'arrangement'?

If she had found out then, we wouldn't be in this mess!

She wouldn't be working, so wouldn't have met Holden. That jackass!

Seriously?!

Now I sit here, wallowing in my self pity, and all I can think about is Lizzie!

I can see her in my head, her wonderful features clocked to memory.

Her long chestnut waves of smooth silky hair, her flawless pale skin, bright blue eyes and blush pink lips, with a natural sexy pout.

Her tight curved body--the perfect hour glass figure--with perky natural breasts which fit my hands perfectly, and an ass that won't quit. Seriously, it's pert, round and gropable.

Even thinking about it makes me hard!

Damn, why does my mate have to be so perfect?

Why did I know her for almost 2 years before finding out who she actually is to my wolf and I.

Why did I not just claim her as my mate when we started our arrangement. We didn't know who our mate was, we didn't feel a connection with anybody apart from Lizzie. I should've known!

What a fucking idiot!

Lizzie was my submissive for 18 whole months, 18 incredible and intense months of submission.

My wolf hated us causing her pain, but it was a such a turn on to watch her snowy skin turn pink under my hands... or belt... or cane. You get the picture.

"Mr Law, there's a man on line one. A private call." My secretary, Georgina, calls through the intercom.

I sigh, and answer the call. "Law."

"Mr Law. Hello. I just thought I'd introduce myself before I take over." A sneering male voice sounds over the line.

"Excuse me?" I snap "Who the fuck are you?"

"Mr Law, I am your replacement. The one who will be having the life you shouldn't have rejected." The guy says with a chuckle. "Fucking idiot!"

I am now seeing red. "To what are you referring to?"

"That sexy pert ass and God, those tits! To think... I get to sleep with her every night."

"Though, in all honesty, those scars you left her with have my wolf and I very angry!"

My mouth drops open, fuck!

Lizzie!

Shit!

"She does not belong with you!" I all but roar. "She is MINE!"

The guy just laughs. "She isn't though! You and that fucker Holden rejected her. Rejected her when she needed you the most!"

"Oh if only you knew what you'd left behind!" "Luckily I'm here to oversee!"

"The funny thing is, I came back in search of Alpha Holden's mate to take down the pack for my master and what did I find? The girl that I wanted to fuck since we were teenagers!"

"Oh yes, I get that everyday and every night. I'm going to take advantage of it before I kill her and her mangey pup!"

My heart stops.

Oh shit.

Wait, what? Pup?

"Pup?!" I gasp.

"Oh yes, Mr Law. Some pathetic spawn! Nothing to worry about, don't worry. You'll be rid of her and the pup soon enough." The line goes dead.

FUCK!

My mate is in danger, and I forced her into his open arms.

I am out of my office in a flash. "Georgina, cancel my meetings! I'm out!" I call over my shoulder as I run out the door.

~*~

-Holden P.O.V.-

I'm isolating myself in the office at the pack house. My home.

I don't want to see anyone, deal with anything or do anything.

I want to be alone.

I want to wallow.

Why the hell did I walk out?

Fucking twat!

My pride got in the way of what I truly wanted. Lizzie. Only Lizzie.

I want her back, but I'm scared she would reject me after the way I behaved, the way I treated her.

She deserves better.

I should've been better.

Locked in my thoughts, I ignore the ruckus that's going on outside the office.

I just want to wallow, and try to form a plan of action to get my mate back.

What could I do?

What could I say?

Just as I start thinking, my office door opens with a loud bang.

I snap my head up to see none other than Dean stood there with an angry look on his face. He's fuming, with six of my pack wolves stood behind him, unsure of how to act.

"Holden. We have to talk... NOW!"

I sigh, I guess this was coming.

If I'm in pain, Dean must be as well.

"Alright, come in. You can leave us." I state to him and my pack.

They nod and shut the door, leaving Dean and I to ourselves.

"So to what do I owe this pleasure?" I ask, sounding bored.

Dean groans. "Lizzie is with some tosser who is using her to get to you. They're dating! On top of that, she's pregnant! The guy called me at work and started sprouting off all this shit about killing her and the pup to get to you, and now me as well. He's a royal piece of work."

My wolf howls inside my head, throwing himself around, trying to get out and kill whatever fucker is using, dating and planning to kill our mate.

"Fuck." I whisper.

"Fuck doesn't cover it Holden!" Dean snaps.

I place my head in my hands. "Maybe we could talk to her? Make her see sense?" I suggest.

Dean shakes his head. "Supposedly, they've been friends since they were teenagers. They obviously have trust and compassion for each other."

"Double fuck." I groan.

Whatever we do, we have to do it quick before they get serious. Before he tries to make his move.

"What? Lizzie's pregnant?" I ask as it finally weasels its way into the forefront of my mind.

Dean nods. "Yeah. Not sure how far or anything but it's obvious this guy isn't the father. He doesn't give a shit about the child's wellbeing. He said 'You'll be rid of her and the pup soon enough' so I guess it's one of ours. I have to know if it's mine. I can't sit around not knowing. My wolf is going crazy." He groans, running a hand through his hair with impatience.

Pregnant...

Baby...

Who's the father?

Me or Dean?

Fuck, fuckety, fuck, fuck, fuck!

"Right, time to formulate a plan!" I state, getting on with the matter at hand, thinking of my mate and possibly my child's safety.

(Lizzie's POV)

Last night was wonderful. I finally slept with Soul and oh wow!

He wasn't as good as Dean or Holden but it was still intense and he was so soft and romantic.

Rose petals all over the bed, candles everywhere and fizzy grape juice--a pregnant craving--with chocolate covered strawberries!

It's as though he read my mind, followed my heart and was making up for all the shit I'd been through over the past few months.

In the middle of the night, I'd also woken up to fluttery kicks in my stomach!

It was the most amazing feeling!

I get my first scan next week as my doctor couldn't fit me in for one until then.

The idea of seeing my baby for the first time is so exciting and heartwarming.

Would it be a girl or boy?

Would they be Alpha blood or not? Thus meaning Holden's or Dean's?

I couldn't care less either way. They're both my mates and they both rejected me at the same time.

I thank the heavens I didn't let them mark me or I'd have their emotions, thoughts and feelings. I'd have the link with them, which includes feeling them when they fuck someone else.

At least I can stay naive.

That's all that really keeps me going.

Don't get me wrong, Soul is amazing, thoughtful, generous and caring but he isn't my mate.

I may have never wanted a mate but at least I had found them before losing them.

As the saying goes: It's better to have loved and lost than to have not loved at all.

Right now, I am cuddled up on the sofa.

Soul is out meeting some old friends this evening, so I'm having a relaxing evening to myself. This consists of:

-Sofa

-TV

-Diet cola

-A large pepperoni pizza

-My weight in cookie dough ice cream.

Lush!

I'm in front of the TV and gorging on a tub of ice cream, huddled up in a thick fleecy blanket.

I feel content and relaxed.

Safe and warm.

Me.

My evening alone is halted by a knock at my front door.

"Who the fuck could that be?" I sigh, curling the duvet around me and stomping out with a sour look on my face to the front door.

I pull it open, and start sprouting off. "Whatever it is, it better be good!" I snap before looking up.

My eyes widen, and my wolf wakes up and stares as far out as me.

"What the fuck do you two want?" I snap. "You have no right turning up here after what you put me through!"

Both of my mates lower their heads with ashamed looks in their faces.

So they bloody well should!

"I'm sorry Lizzie. We need to speak to you! It's urgent!" Holden says softly, before going all Alpha business on me.

I roll my eyes. "What's so important that you're here gone 10 at night?!"

"It's the guy you're seeing..." Dean answers this time. I grit my teeth. "How the hell do you know about him? What does he have to do with you? He's here for me. Not you. So butt out!"

"NO!" Dean shouts before barging past me.

I groan, knowing I'm not going to win against two stubborn pig-headed males.

"Make yourself at home!" I snap sarcastically.

I follow them through to my living room where they're both stood.

I go and return to the sofa, grabbing my prenatal vitamins and the bottle of cola, taking two tablets and swigging them back.

They don't stay down for long. Fucking morning sickness. Should I say all day and night sickness!

I jump to my feet and rush out of the room with my hand over my mouth.

I know I won't make it to the bathroom so I head for the kitchen sink. I throw up the entire pizza, most of the ice cream and the two tablets I just took. My eyes streaming as the hot burning pain fills my throat with the stomach acid making its way up.

I feel a spark as somebody takes my hair, holding it while rubbing my back soothingly.

I groan and stand when the nausea eases.

I rinse out the sink, and grab a plastic cup, filling it with cold water from the faucet.

I turn and look as both Dean and Holden look at me with worry.

"What?!" I snap. I'm not in the mood for games right now. I feel like death warmed up.

"Are you ok?" Holden asks gently.

I shake my head. "No. Really, I'm not. I've been rejected twice over, I'm dating someone I may have loved once but my feelings have changed and I'm dealing with the most upsetting thing for any woman, wolf or human to deal with! Life ain't easy!"

Dean sighs and runs his hands through his hair. I know him well enough to know he's feeling powerless. Something he hates.

"Can we talk Lizzie? Please? Just hear us out." Holden asks.

I know I won't get them out of my flat, so I nod and make my way back to the living room. I see the food and back away from the sofa, nausea taking over again.

"Can someone get the food and cola out of here. I'm gonna hurl!" I moan, holding my stomach.

I watch as both of them, at inhuman speed collect up everything and take it out into the kitchen.

Just then I feel a rather strong kick. My baby knows their daddy is here. It's obvious.

I stroke my little bump, and sigh. "It's ok. Don't worry." I murmur, looking down at it.

I hear someone clearing their throat, and I jump, looking up into two pairs of wide eyes.

"It's true!" Dean gasps.

"We're having a baby?" Holden questions.

I sigh, I knew I couldn't keep this a secret for long. "Yes, I am having a baby." I state, making it clear it was my baby, not theirs.

"Do you err..." Dean falters.

I know what he's trying to ask a question I don't have the answer to.

"No I don't know who's baby it is, but the baby sure knows its one of you!"

Holden's eyes light up. "Really?" He whispers in amazement.

I nod."Yup. I'm being kicked a thousand times a minute."

The looks on their faces, it's like Christmas has come early!!

"Can we just deal with why you're here?" I sigh, wanting them out of my flat before I beg them to come back to me.

I sit down on the sofa, and both of them follow, sitting either side of me.

"Right. I guess we should start from the beginning... Dean?" Holden murmurs.

Dean nods and begins to talk. "I had a phone call this morning... it was a guy claiming to be your boyfriend. He was warning me against you. He said I was an idiot for rejecting you and he was going to take my place."

"He then told me he is working for his 'master', who wants to bring down Holden's pack. As we all know, the best way to the pack is the Alpha, and to get to the Alpha, you go for his..."

"...mate." I gasp.

"Right." Dean continues. "So he then told me he was going to take advantage of the fact that he has you before he kills you and your pup."

My heart stumbles before picking up triple time.

"That's where I come in." Holden sighs. "Dean turned up at the pack house and filled me in. We decided we needed to speak to you first before doing anything. Not only is this guy threatening to take down the pack for some unknown master, but he's threatening to end your life and the pup. We can't watch that happen."

Soul wouldn't do this to me!

He loves me!

He's known me since I was in high school. He's my best friend!

My everything!

How? He couldn't! He wouldn't!

"You're lying! You're just trying to hurt me so I stay single. Soul loves me! He's always loved me. He is charming, thoughtful, generous, caring and understanding. He is not the man you are thinking of. You must be confusing him with somebody else." I state, sounding so sure of myself.

"So you're seeing someone else too?" Dean snaps.

I open my mouth to answer, but end up looking like a goldfish. My mouth opening and closing every few seconds.

I shake away the hurt and answer. "How dare you even think that!"

How dare he!!

"I'm sorry. I just... if he's not the guy then somebody is lying! We have to find out for sure."

Just then a phone starts ringing.

It's Holden's.

He pulls out his phone from his jeans pocket, and answers.

"Yup? Err... no. What? You're fucking serious!! No, I'm not. Err... that's none of your business. Right. I'm on my way."

Holden looks up at Dean, and then at me. "We all have to go now! A group of rogues have started at the pack house. They're demanding to see us. All of us."

I swallow hard. "Why? Why all of us? This should prove Soul isn't the guy!"

Holden shrugs. "I have no idea but if it's not him, life will be easier for all of us."

My heart breaks at his formal voice and words. "You just don't care do you? You'd rather reject me and let me stay with Soul, someone who's not my mate, than give up your pride to try and sort this out!"

I am fuming but I have to force my anger down before my wolf takes over and I shift, endangering the life of my unborn pup.

"Get out! Both of you!"

They look at each other, and then me. "We are not leaving you here on your own unprotected." Dean states.

"Like hell am I going with you! Not after what you just said! I'm done trying to fight my wolf. I'm done trying to stand up for you. I'm done waiting around for you two to come to your senses. I'm done trying to think of the good times we shared. None of it fucking matters to you! I'm just the girl that fucked up your lives! Now get the hell out!"

Just then I hear a key in the door, and in walks a scratched up, bloodied Soul.

I gasp and rush over. "What happened? Are you ok? Soul! Look at me! Baby, please?" I flutter my hands in the air uselessly.

I hear low growls behind me, but I chose to ignore them.

Soul looks up at me, and sighs. "A group of strong rogues passed me and beat me up cos I was in their way. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time."

I gasp, and wrap my arms around his waist. "It's ok baby. Let me clean you up." I murmur, pulling him to the kitchen... but he stopped me.

"Who are they?" He asks, pointing to Dean and Holden who are following in protective mode.

"Nobody important." I turn around to them. "Weren't you just leaving?" I ask spitefully.

Dean grits his teeth. "No. Not until HIS story checks out! Right now it doesn't."

He moves closer with one step. "I know his voice! It was you on the phone! It was YOU!"

Soul looks at me confused. "See?!" I snap. "He hasn't got a clue what you're talking about so back the hell off and get out!"

Dean and Holden admit defeat and leave my flat, shutting the front door behind them.

Thank fuck for that!

I turn and start to work, cleaning up Soul's wounds.