The next morning, I busied myself by doing my duties as the Gamma in the training ground. I was greeted by the sound of steel clashing, and warriors sparring filled the air while others were preparing for the training by rock climbing. Then, I helped to adjust the strap of the harness of one of my fellow pack warriors and taught them how to do it better.

Since I was still on my vacation and couldn't decide what I was going to do for the next few days, I had decided to help with the training. Not only that, but this was to distract me.

It was hard to forget about what I witnessed with Redmund and Lilith. Until now, I still felt the bitterness gnawing inside me, including how I slept with Commander Lucretius.

In my peripheral vision, Alpha Derrick stood near the training grounds, his arms folded as he observed the warriors' progress. His presence was calm yet commanding. He was one of the people I respected the most.

If it weren't for him approving some of the women here to join the royal military, I wouldn't be in this position. He also admired Commander Rachelle Simon for her bravery, which led him to finally promote a few of the women to be Gammas as well.

When I approached him, he turned to me, his sharp eyes softening with recognition. "Greetings, Alpha," I greeted with a bow.

"Euphyllia." He nodded, acknowledging me.

"What brings you here, Alpha?" I asked politely. As far as I know, he was handling some business in town with our Beta.

Not to judge why he came here to the training ground, but I had a feeling that he wouldn't come here for a reason. I noticed that Beta Rocco wasn't with him. Perhaps, he had an errand to do that made Alpha come here.

He studied me for a moment before speaking. "Two matters. First, patrols found fresh rogue tracks near the eastern ridge. I'd like your assessment. You've always had a keen eye for these things."

I straightened, feeling honored at what he said. "I'll look into it immediately. If they're close, we can't risk them circling back."

I knew that I was feeling down lately, but with Alpha Derrick asking for insight, I felt energized and was quick to make a response. Being a tactical keeper was such a good investment.

Alpha Derrick nodded, satisfied with my answer, but then his expression changed. This time, it looked heavier and cautious. "The second matter is... less simple." He fished out of his breast pocket and pulled out a sealed letter. When he bestowed it on me, my breath caught in my throat upon seeing the stamped with the crimson insignia of the royal military. "This arrived by messenger hawk this morning. It's addressed to you."

Staring at it, my heart was pounding so fast. I was in the middle of my vacation leave, and the fact that I was receiving a letter from the royal military, could this mean that something had happened?

I paused, not wanting to jump to a conclusion, touching the parchment before breaking the seal quickly.

'To all enlisted soldiers under the Royal Military Order:

You are hereby summoned back to the capital at once. Your leave is suspended. Attendance is mandatory.'

My throat tightened. I knew it. A sudden summon meant only one thing... There could be a war. Or perhaps, worse.

Was the issue about the rogue faction that had been causing these past few months as to why we were summoned back?

I folded the letter slowly, trying my best to keep my composure as I met Alpha Derrick's gaze.

I coerced a smile. "I am being summoned back to the royal military as soon as possible, Alpha," I told him the truth. "I might have to leave tomorrow."

With this kind of summoning letter, leaving tomorrow was the best solution.

He nodded. "I understand. And I always support the path you chose, Euphyllia," he said, placing a hand on my shoulder. "Go and make our pack proud."

My chest tightened at his words. I could also feel my eyes getting misty. Alpha Derrick was always supportive of women pursuing different paths, not just staying at home and doing chores. Because he also supported our Luna, Olivia, who had established her own business. He wasn't feeling ashamed about it. That was why my pack members and I love our beloved Alpha and Luna of the Starry Shadows Pack.

I tucked the letter into my satchel and squared up. "I'll handle the rogues at the northern ridge before I leave, Alpha," I promised. "I owe my pack that much."

Alpha Derrick gave a small, approving nod as a small smile plastered on his lips. "Spoken like a true Gamma right there."

I inclined my head before him as a sign of respect for him, even though something was bothering me about the events for today.

Why did it feel like I had lived this before? Why did it feel like they didn't look new to me, but nuisance?

Perhaps, I really should tend to it for closure... Or that was the thing I should call it.

That night, I had prepared myself for the mission Alpha Derrick entrusted to me. I strapped on my gear, tying my hair back as I went to the northern border for the ridge patrol. The memory of Redmund's lips on Lilith's crossed in my mind, and my wolf howled in pain, but I forced it down to forget.

Duty came first, Euphyllia. We must not let this betrayal be a burden!

I dispatched two pack warriors to scout the northern forest. "Circle wide and flank from opposite ends. If you sense anything unusual, don't engage. Report back. Understand?"

They nodded. "Yes, Gamma Euphyllia." With that, they disappeared into the shadows.

I heaved out a sigh, feeling a little better that I got to execute being a gamma here. My fellow Gammas weren't here as they had their own function. I was the only one available at the moment, as to why Alpha Derrick asked me to take care of it.

Minutes passed, and the faint hoot of the owls and the soft breeze from the forest became the music to our ears. I was alerted by our border guards when someone was approaching, and my guy twisted upon seeing only one scout, who was in his wolf form, emerge from the treeline, breathing heavily when he returned to his human form.

Alone.

"Where is Rivan, Ives?" I demanded, maintaining my calm and composure.

Back in my training days as both a Gamma-in-the-making and a soldier of the royal military before choosing the path as a tactical keeper, one lesson was drilled into us above all. It was to maintain composure, understand the situation, and assess it carefully.

Ives shook his head, panic registering in his eyes. "H-He never made it to the checkpoint, Gamma. We separated at the ride, but... but I didn't hear a fight. I-It was like he vanished."

I cussed under my breath. "Stay here." I tapped his shoulder. "If I don't return in thirty minutes, alert Alpha Derrick immediately," I commanded. "That's an order, Ives," I emphasized and glared at him when he was about to protest.

I transformed into my wolf form, my bones starting to crack with no hint of pain as my four paws hit the ground. I reclined my head so my snout could smell the scent of my fellow pack member before I began running through the forest.

As I evaded the trees, the moonlight became my guide as I looked up, seeing how it was shining beautifully. And it was like it was leading me to where my fellow pack warrior was.

That was how I found Rivan leaning against a tree trunk, not far from the ridge. My heart dropped as I rushed to him. "Rivan!" I immediately placed my hand on his wrist, pressing the pulse while my other hand was on his nose to feel the breathing.

"He's unconscious," I mumbled under my breath, sighing in relief. "Thank the Moon Goddess. He's alright."

Then, I checked if he had any signs of wounds or struggle because I found it suspicious. But then, I came to see a familiar rich pink petals, realizing it was a chrysanthemum peeking at his breast pocket.

As I gently pulled, my brows furrowed upon seeing a small rolled parchment tied in the stem. My pulsation hammered as I unfolded.

For one second, I held my breath as I read the words written beautifully.

'It's good that I finally caught your attention. You're even more beautiful up close than only watch you from afar, Lady Euphyllia. But don't worry. I'm a patient person. I'll wait till you're prepared to meet me. And until then, I'll be watching.'

A chill rushed down my spine, making me freeze in my tracks. "What... What the hell is this?" I muttered in disbelief.

"I shall take my leave, Alpha, Beta," I bid farewell to the two most important people in my pack as I mounted in a carriage.

They both nodded. "Make our pack proud, Euphyllia." Those were Beta Rocco's words before the carriage set out on a departure.

Sighing, I stayed quiet for a long moment, leaning on my seat before closing my eyes, feeling a little exhausted.

The summons from the royal military should have been the only thing on my mind right now as I packed at dawn, but that one single letter was enough to make me feel restless throughout the whole night.

I had read it once, and once was enough. However, those words were etched on my mind and kept replaying like a broken record.

'It's good that I finally caught your attention. You're even more beautiful up close than only watch you from afar, Lady Euphyllia. But don't worry. I'm a patient person. I'll wait till you're prepared to meet me. And until then, I'll be watching.'

That parchment was resting in the pocket of my uniform jacket as if it had every right to be there against my chest.

No seal. No signature. Only those words, beautifully carved with steady strokes if whoever the gentleman who had written this had spent a lot of effort to make his action impressive to his lady.

Shivers coursed through my body. I knew that I should have thrown this letter when I got home, but I couldn't bring myself to. And I didn't know whether I should feel flattered, threatened, or both.

Was this supposed to be how admiration should go? Or was this an art of stalking?

It was hard to decipher the intention of the person who was the culprit of this letter. But one thing I could decipher was that he spent a lot of effort to trigger Alpha Derrick's uncanny ability to sense intruders near the pack's borders, which was a normal ability for every Alpha. Not only that, having Ives' unconscious just to send the letter was extremely foolish.

I slowly peeled my eyes open, scrutinizing the single chrysanthemum in my hand that until now, I was still holding onto it.

This flower was my favorite of them all. How did that person know about it?

The fact that the person knew about such a small fact that this was my favorite had made me uncomfortable.

My pulse quickened just by the thought of it. Even my hands were going clammy and quivering from what was happening.

Was there an admirer that I didn't know about? Then, who could that be?

Could it be... Redmund? Impossible! Never once had I seen Redmund spend such effort to make a letter.

He would be cautious in being intimate with me. He would never do such a thing as give me any material things that would be suspicious about our relationship.

With that realization, I mindlessly clenched my hand with the chrysanthemum inside my palm. I almost dropped it as I snapped back to reality, looking to my left and right as if frightened that someone might have been watching me for longer than I could imagine.

I was already too late to realize what I had done and flinched as my emotions blinded me just by thinking about how I became a fool towards Redmund.

And now that I would be returning to the royal military headquarters, I would cross paths with Redmund and Lilith.

Just thinking about meeting them again after a few days that I was in my vacation leave was enough to make my heart ache because of their betrayal.

How would I suppose to act fine when I get to see them? Pretend the wound in my chest didn't exist? Or confront Redmund and ask him what his plan is for us, or would there be any plan, and I was just hoping for empty promises?

I must polish what I should do next before facing them. Even though my heart was bleeding, I must apply being a tactical keeper.

I must not let them be a winner in this...

I bit my lower lip as my vision blurred from my tears falling. I gently wiped them away, telling myself to stop shedding tears for those people who had hurt me.

But why was it so hard? They were the people I loved the most.

There was no way that I could be able to show that I was alright.

Those were my thoughts even until I arrived at the camp. With a heavy heart, I reported to my senior, Marlin.

"Sorry for the short notice, Euphyllia," Marlin said when I entered his study. "I know your vacation leave was cut short."

I shook my head. "I don't really mind," I answered politely, clenching and unclenching my hand because Redmund suddenly popped up in my mind for no reason. My heart began to ache again because of it. "I know that this is an emergency, so military first before anything."

My boots echoed in the corridor as I left Marlin's study room. I thanked myself that I didn't break down in front of my senior, or else, I would have had a hard time explaining what had been aching in me lately.

It was my heart. Not physically, but emotionally.

As I turned the corner, I halted when I came to heard some giggles in the corridor and I spotted the people my heart had been aching right now.

Lilith... Redmund...

I held my breath upon seeing them standing close together. The one I heard giggling softly was no other than Lilith, her hand brushing Redmund's sleeves, while on the other hand, Redmund was whispering something in her ear as if there was something funny.

I clenched my hand from the sight I was seeing right now. I wasn't prepared to see them, yet the Moon Goddess would always find a way to mess up with me.

My heels were about to spin when Lilith noticed me. "Euphie!"

My nickname that escaped from her lips was cutting my heart into shreds.

I pursed my lips into a thin line, unable to come up with a word. But my eyes lingered on Redmund, and my wolf felt heartbroken when his expression shifted with unease. But he didn't even distance himself from Lilith.

I swallowed the lump that was barricading my throat. "Lilith." I nodded, coercing a smile at her before turning to Redmund. I raised my hand to salute him. "Captain Redmund, greetings."

Redmund licked his lips, hiding the quivering of his lips before nodding. "Greetings..." he paused.

I secretly gnashed my teeth, silently hoping that he would at least mention my name to Lilith.

But he didn't.

"Ruinart, sir. Euphyllia Ruinart."

Please, Redmund. If you care about me, at least mention my first name...

"Oh..." Redmund sounded like he had just met me. "Greetings, Ruinart."

Ah. This hurts so much. I just wanted him to at least acknowledge my first name whenever we were alone together, but he couldn't. As always.

I had the sudden urge to run away. But my feet were nailed to the ground.

"I-I didn't mean to intrude, you two." Then, I exchanged my gaze with them. But my eyes instantly lowered to the ground when they were getting misty. "M-My apologies. There's something I should do right now."

I made an excuse to leave. I couldn't last long to stay with them. I felt like I was about to pass out.

"Let's catch up later, Euphie!" Lilith shouted across the corridor when I was walking away from them.

Her voice chased after me, but I quickened my steps until I reached my quarters. As soon as the door closed behind me, my shoulders slumped, and my forehead pressed against the wooden door, trying so hard to breathe.

A sob escaped from my lips when Lilith's giggle, Redmund's silence, the way he didn't even acknowledge me as a lover or a friend, but as a freaking subordinate!

"Ruinart, sir. Euphyllia Ruinart."

I recalled my words as if I were a new soldier, introducing myself to my new senior. I hated that I had awakened from my deep slumber and still wanted him to acknowledge me, just by calling me by my first name.

"Redmund... Am I not really the mate you wanted?" I sobbed in a whisper, coming up to a painful conclusion.

Dragging myself to the bed, I was sitting on the edge of my bed, staring at the wall for a moment until my peripheral vision caught a white flower on my table.

It was a chrysanthemum!

My stomach dropped. I remembered that there was nothing on my table when I left to report to my senior. I knew it.

I knew all of my things and how neatly I was in arranging them. And if this was the same chrysanthemum from last night, it was deemed impossible because I accidentally crushed it with my bare hand earlier in the trip.

"Don't tell me..." I gulped, my hands trembling when I reached out to it.

My heart froze when I saw another small letter that had been rolled and tied to the stem. Again.

I gulped, my lips feeling dry as I unfolded it.

'It must have hurt watching them. You don't need to hide that from me, Lady Euphyllia. I see you. I always do. One day, you will see me, too. Until then, remember... you are not alone. I will be here, watching.'

I nearly dropped the note. My hands were clammy, my heart hammering. Whoever this was... not only had they entered my quarters, but they knew exactly what I had gone through mere moments ago.

This wasn't a coincidence. This was someone following me. Studying me.

This was the behavior of a potential stalker!

Fear and fury mingled in my chest. Who was this person? How long had he been this close?

Oh, dear Moon Goddess, please help me!

First, I had to be hurt seeing Redmund and Lilith together.

Second, I had to worry about meeting cross paths with Commander Lucretius.

And lastly, this. A stalker I never knew about, and just appeared recently.

I had so many things on my plate now. Could I be able to survive being in the royal military?

The order had come down this morning: all soldiers and clerical staff were to assemble in the hall. My colleagues and I were waiting for the meeting to commence.

"Ms. Euphyllia, I miss you!" I chuckled when Cerys, Marlin's assistant, tightly hugged me. "Why didn't Sir Marlin inform me about your arrival yesterday? It's so unfair! We could have caught up!" She frowned, burying her face in my bosom.

Chuckling one more time, I gently patted her head. "You are running some errands. That's why." I looked up when Marlin arrived. "Don't be mad at Marlin anymore."

Marlin arched his eyebrow when he caught Cerys glaring at him. He heaved out a sigh and looked at me helplessly. "Flick her forehead for me."

"Ouch!" Cerys gasped and looked at me in disbelief.

I smiled wryly at her. "I'm only following the orders." I gestured my head towards Marlin.

Cerys pouted but still clung to me while glaring at Marlin again, but he didn't pay her attention and was busy talking to his peers. I chuckled, my chest feeling lighter because of her. She looked up to me as her older sister, which was why she was one of the few comrades I got to close with. She was just two years younger than me and became our senior's assistant a year ago.

"I wonder which of the commanders will hold the meeting."

Our heads turned at Klein's arrival, who worked in the same field as me. He sat in front of us as he yawned and leaned on his seat before turning his head to us.

"Hey, Ruinart. How's your vacation leave? Must be awful that it's cut short, huh?"

"Indeed. It's quite... awful," I muttered bitterly, causing Cerys to gape at me from my words. Masking my smile, I caressed her head. "I hope Marlin will pay my remaining vacation leave days." I jested when he arrived.

Marlin pierced me with a gaze while Klein and Cerys laughed at my jest. "Where are the others? Didn't I tell you to summon them, Cerys?"

Cerys stood up. "I will check on them, sir." A wry smile plastered on her lips as she stormed out of the hall.

"They certainly are taking their time." Klein huffed and shrugged his shoulders.

Before I could respond by agreeing with him, a hush came from the other row when more soldiers entered the hall. However, two figures caught my eye, making my heart drop.

It was Redmund and Lilith. He was moving with confidence, his stunning beauty never faltered, and his presence commanding almost took my breath away while Lilith was beside him with her usual poise, her hair pinned flawlessly, and her lips curled up in a smile.

"Isn't that Lilith? She's with Captain Redmund."

"They look rather close, don't they?"

"I heard that they're dating already."

The whispers made me gnash my teeth.

Lilith's hand lingered a little too familiarly on Redmund's arm as though she wanted everyone to notice. Her laugh, airy and practiced, reached me even across the rows, threading through the murmurs.

"Typical," Klein muttered under his breath, rolling his eyes. "Parading themselves before a meeting. If they're truly together, good luck to him. He'll need it."

My lips pressed into a thin line. I wanted to ignore them, at least to look away, but I couldn't bring myself so as I followed Redmund's every movement. He greeted a few officers with a smile that didn't reach his eyes before his attention flickered across the hall, only to land on me.

M y heart skipped a beat before he averted his gaze as if he had never looked at me.

My lips were quivering, my heart shattering into pieces from his action. His action was still the same. He would only look at me for a few moments before turning away as if I was just a nobody to him and would only look at me if we would meet secretly.

I excused myself, claiming I needed the powder room. I scurried away before tears would threaten to fall from my eyes.

The cool air of the corridor brushed against my cheeks, but it gave a little comfort to my aching chest. My footsteps leading to the powder room became the only music that consoled me. It was empty like how my heart was right now.

I leaned against the counter, gripping its edge as if it was only my salvation right now not to cry.

"Pull yourself together, Euphyllia," I mumbled, staring myself at the mirror. I even began to fan myself to cease the tears resting in the corners of my eyes. "You've been taught composure. Always composure."

I kept chanting silently until I froze when my eyes landed on the flower vase, resting neatly on the marble surface of the sink, and saw a familiar flower alone.

A chrysanthemum!

Again!

If from the other day, I saw that it was a pink and yesterday was a white one, now, it was a red chrysanthemum!

"No way..." My breath hitched. "Not again...." I gulped, my hands trembling when I saw another note tied in the stem. My heart was racing as I unfolded it, preparing myself for another eerie message.

'Oh, if I were him, I would never ignore you. I would never let another woman cling to me while you stood alone. He is blind, Lady Euphyllia. But I see you. Always. Remember this. Look at me. Only me.'

I hissed in annoyance and hurriedly checked every cubicle if there was any person other than me. I couldn't control how my body was shaking when I found no one, even checking the outside of the powder room. I saw no one was around.

Why of all times had this flower been appearing in a place where I was in my solitude then there would be a note from that person?

This stalker...

Every time I go, this stalker left a note for me. This wasn't funny anymore.

My knees were on the brink of giving up, and I clutched the sink, holding the edge so tight. The words on the note etched in my head.

'Look at me. Only me.'

Whoever this was... how much did they know? Were they in the hall, watching Redmund and Lilith the same way I was? Or were they also following me everywhere, waiting for the opportunity to be alone?

And could this person anticipate my movements as to where I was going?

Damn it! This person had given me two restless nights already. And I had no idea why they were leaving note for me.

My hand pressed on my chest, trying to calm myself as I was forcing myself to take a deep breath, but the air in here felt suffocating, and it felt like I was being watched as of this moment.

"I won't... I won't let this shake me." I gulped, fanning myself. I could almost feel myself hyperventilating.

My eyes darted at the flower. I grabbed it and shoved it into the trash as if doing that would be enough to calm my nerves.

But even doing that and telling myself to forget it, the message kept ringing in my head.

'Look at me. Only me.'

I shook my head vigorously before gently tapping my cheeks to wake myself. I must take my leave before this place makes me crazy. I used my hands to straighten my uniform and smooth my hair.

"Inhale. Exhale," I chanted softly. I must remain calm when I return. I must remain calm.

No one should see the brink of my downfall, not my comrades, not my senior, and certainly not Redmund and Lilith.

Those two were the last people I would let see me breaking down.

As I left the powder room, my eyes cautiously looked from left and right, using my wolf senses, if there was anyone other than me, but it was still empty and eerily quiet. When it felt like everything was clear to me and no signs of that stalker, I made my way back toward the assembly hall, but somehow, I felt uneasy.

It felt like I was being watched right now from this distance.

It felt like I was no longer safe anywhere.

The moment I pushed the doors of the hall, it creaked softly as I realized the meeting had already begun. All of the soldiers and clerical staff were silent as their gazes were fixated on the tall, commanding figure standing on the platform.

Those familiar freckled hazel eyes. That short, neat brunette hair that was softly to clutch. A trimmed beard frames a face cut sharply with authority.

No... No way... He was here?!

I cursed under my breath because the words from the note echoed in my head again, repeating like a broken record.

'Look at me. Only me.'

As if the fate was jesting on me, that man I never wanted to meet again locked his eyes on mine. Commander Lucretius's upper lip curled into a smile as if he had finally found his prey.