Angelica

After I savour a flavouring breakfast to my satisfaction my stomach was full within a few minutes. The plane slowly began to pick up its speed and seconds later we were high in the sky. As this was the first time I was flying I was starting to feel slightly anxious. I had a phobia towards flights right since my childhood but was never exposed to such a fear as me and my mom were a family always below the poverty line barely able to meet our ends.

With the passage of time I begin to feel more nervous and start perspiring. I did not want Robert to know my weakness and so I turned my face to the window with my hands trembling, covered between my knees. But unfortunately he seems to have already noted it. Within a second I was brought into an encapsulation of protective arms holding me to a hard chest. So, this is how a child is been taken care by a father? The feeling felt foreign to me as I was never bestowed to experience fatherly affection. Yet the blissful moment brought an unveiling delectation in my heart. After years of starving warmth I felt myself ones again as an infant lying completely shielded in the arms of my father. The sensation was anomalous, entirely strange, still it was ironically pleasurable.

“Princess, you are going to be okay. I hire the best pilots around the globe. There is nothing for you to fear.” Robert murmurs to me making soothing circles on my back latching me to his warm chest. He looked at my tearing eyes and wiped the liquid away with his fingers. Though I hated my dad for abandoning me and mom yet for this moment I want to forget everything and stay cocooned in his arms. Running his hands on my back he succeeds to calm me down. My eyelids drop automatically and my body unwillingly begins to accept his gentleness.

*******

Opening my eyes with the intruding rays of light peeping from the window curtains I look around and notice I was in a girl’s bedroom. Probably it was his daughter’s bedroom which she was generous enough to share with me. The foreign feeling brought a pit in my stomach with which I was not ready to come to terms. ‘He’ left my mom long back. He probably remarried and has a daughter. I wasn’t prepared to share ‘him’ though it was the dumbest statement that could have ever been made. Angelica, why do you keep dreaming and expect too much?

The room was extortionately decorated and screamed opulent designed in a princess theme which was my most favourite. The curtains were light pink embellished in a forest design. On the other side was a comforter with teddy bears placed on it in different sizes. The bed I was sleeping had a big golden crown as its headboard complementing the idea. A purple bed sheet covered the mattress with prints of fairies holding magic wands. Towards one corner was a huge reading table made of African black wood and the other corner had a massive doll house my best-loved part.

Staying with my mom, I couldn’t lead a rich life style but I was a big fan of Barbie. With the little money my mom saved, she often brought me Barbie and Betty dolls. After I finish my homework I often play with my dolls which are my dearest past time.

After taking some more time hogging the blankets, I rid myself out of sleep and feel the need to pee. I look around the room finally to trace a washroom. It was equally expensive and beautiful with lavish bathroom fittings and even a Jacuzzi. I complete my chores when I hear a muffled sound from the bedroom. Looking over I find an elderly lady smiling at me warmly. She was holding some clothes in her hands. Placing them on the bed she tells me in her motherly voice “Little madam, sir is waiting for you at the dining table. After you finish dressing up, you can come down and have your breakfast with him.

I take a relaxing bath setting the required temperature and filling my tub with bubbles. After the shower I look at the dress placed on the bed with a towel draped around my body. It was a beautiful yellow summer frock with red polka dots on it. Getting ready I go down the stairs to meet dad whose eyes were stationed reading the newspaper in his hands.

Noting me occupy one of the dining chairs he diverts his eyes from the paper and looks at me with a gentle smile. I greet him as a form of courtesy though nothing can change my aversion for him for betraying me and my mom. “Princess did you have a pleasant sleep?” He asks me tenderly. I nod my head to his answer and start to eat the mouth watering breakfast of bacon, fried eggs, toast and pancakes placed on the table. Watching me for a while with his guarding eyes he asks me further. “Did you like your room?” I turn my eyes from the palatial plate looking at him wonder struck. “Was that my room?” My voice almost in a whisper unable to believe the words he just spoke. He simply nods with a tender smile on his face. My lips slightly part. A slow grin was casually taking its place changing into a wide smile. “I like it very much.” I answer him with a bright smile. My eyes still gleaming in happiness like shining stars in the sky. . “I am glad you like it. I know you are a huge fan of Barbie and princesses. So I got your room decorated in your favourite core.” He speaks to me in a voice filled with affection.

Angelica, don’t fall for him. He is using all his grace to make you melt just like your mom did.... years ago.

Few minutes later after I almost finish my breakfast he begins to speak ones again “princess tomorrow will be the first day of your school. Get ready tomorrow by 8’o clock. I will be dropping you at school and then be going to my office.”

Hush Baby! It’s just tomorrow that I am even joining a school. He is cool and damn impressive in everything he administers. No wonder my mother fell for his charms.

Robert

Margaret my wife, she was the sweetest person I ever had in my life. I fell in love with her at my first sight but woefully it was the toughest struggle to have her in my life. She was a simple girl, very beautiful, hailing from a decent family and I on the contrary was the wretch of the dark world, the only son of the mob leader John Evans, who was brought up in the midst of knives and countless murders. Nothing was similar between her and me yet I couldn't help myself but to fall for her, a sweet and simple middle class girl who had the best smile in the world.

My family, my friends and every person from our gang cautioned me to stay away from her but my heart wouldn't simply listen. I knew she was like a candle that would bring brightness in a person's life but I am a Badger who needs to stay in the dark to hunt for its prey. Both of us could never be one we are people from two different poles who can never ever stay together. Still knowing everything I swept her out of her feet, took away every inch of her innocence and made her mine forever.

I remember the first time that I saw her. She was sitting in the college cafeteria with some of her friends. A girl beside her spoke to her something in the ear and her pink lips curl into the most enigmatic smile that I ever saw. My heart went crazy. An immediate feeling to haul her and make her mine evoked inside me like a gravitational pull. She looked around with her sparkling icy blues that shined like stars in the dark sky. Her eyes stationed on someone standing on the other side of the hall. Pulling on her long slender legs she walked forward like an alluring femme fatale. "Hey Xavier, it's been so long since we have met each other." She went and hugged the man who was talking to someone.

His eyes caught hers and his hands immediately moved around her back returning her embrace. Jealousy strikes me all of a sudden. She was mine and mine only to touch and have. She took hold of his hand and dragged him between her groups of friends to introduce him. I couldn't turn away my gaze but to look at the walking beauty in front of me. Her long chestnut hair swayed along her sides in wavy curls by the chilled breeze blowing inside the open hall of the cafeteria on the mid November evening.

I hid the truth from her and married her eloping from both our families. She was the light of my life attracting me towards her like a moth. Two years after our successful romantic marriage we had a beautiful baby daughter. She looked just like me but had the eyes and hair of her mother. For a few more months I could continue my charade with my wife but ultimately she came to know the truth.

There were fights initially often times leaving her cold and unloving towards me and ultimately she ended our marriage. I pleaded her for years and made endless phone calls to let me into her life. I told her not to deprive our baby of a fatherly care but she couldn't welcome the request though we didn't divorce each other. She felt the life of our baby was unsafe with me as one of her parent. I couldn't convince her anymore and left her but always prayed God to keep her and our baby sheltered.

The light of my life was gone forever. From that day forward I did meaningless relationships and abused sex. I became a man whore. I was always drunk and did drugs ruining my body and mind. My parents tried to amend me but couldn't reap a good result.

Though everything changed inside me there was one thing that I would never forget. Every year I bought gifts for my daughter on her birthday. Some were flaunting wealth while others were purchased just keeping in mind of her growing necessities. I promised my wife that I would never re-enter their lives until the day she desired of it. The gifts would reach my daughter through some of my wife's employers or some mutual friends. Sometimes I bought gifts just like that leaving them at their doorstep.

I saw to it that my wife and daughter were never deprived of a roof over their heads. I took care of Margaret's growing medical bills. She was a woman of lot of self pride. She would not allow me to spend too much money on them. She wanted to take care of Angelica totally on her own but became unsuccessful in the end. When the water reached above their heads I had to force myself into their lives. I was always there for my family like a shadow watching them from behind so that they do not break and fall apart.

Present

Today my daughter will be reaching our home. I am very enthusiastic about her arrival. It is the place where I and Margaret built beautiful dreams, cherished and nurtured.  The happiness that I presently hold cannot be described in words. It is like a child getting his favourite ice-cream for the first time in his life. I do not know much about my princess's tastes and fashion but from the little I heard from Margaret, I made every necessary preparation for her entrance into our home.

I got her bedroom designed in her favourite princess theme. I know she is a huge fan of Barbie. I loaded her closet with dresses I personally bought according to latest trend and fashion. Of course I will never buy her outfits which are revealing. I had already loaded my TV shelf with princess movies. I informed my chefs of her favoured cuisine and gave them a list of her best loved dishes.

I could not sleep peacefully yesterday night always attentive of any sound from her room. I was anxious about her health. She was perspiring in the flight yesterday. I did not know she had a phobia towards flights. Margaret never informed me about it. Probably she never knew as they never travelled by a flight. I wanted to hold my daughter to my chest and let her sleep in my arms so that she doesn't have any bad dreams. I wanted to make her feel secured in my embrace but our relationship was unfortunately not in the best terms.

I sent the maid to her room with a yellow sundress which I handpicked a few days back for her casual wear. The dress caught my sight at the first glance itself exhibited in the display box and I knew it was made for my beautiful daughter. I am now eagerly waiting for her at the dining table yearning to ask if she had a good night's sleep and see her in the dress I loved the most.

Will Robert be able to win the heart of his daughter?

Angelica

Setting on an alarm I went to bed early yesterday night and woke up at 6 in the morning. For a change I did not have to stitch my tattered uniform or press my ragged clothes. I need not have to worry about the time and scolding I would receive from our principal for going to school late that I spent in stitching my old rags.

I don’t have to fret about the pending bills my mother has to pay during the month or the late night shifts that she would take up only to fill the dishes on our dining table. I need not be anxious about my late school fees. Thankful for the difference everything felt refreshing and right at place.

Yesterday I saw an image of my mom in my dream. She was smiling at me with so much of happiness and gleam in her eyes. Her lips no longer looked pale and dry and there were no black marks under her eyes. She looked beautiful and at peace. It felt like her soul now rests in peace after years of assiduousness. She was right in front of me watching me with so much happiness.

The dream felt so real that I opened my eyes to look for her but there was no sign of mom. After that I could not sleep anymore. The indescribable feeling felt horrible. I don’t know why but I went to the adjacent room where my dad slept. I looked at his sleeping form relaxing on the comfy mattress and a despicable rage filled my stance. I immediately left his room blaring red.

After a few hours I got down the stairs completely dressed for my first day at school. As soon as I neared the dining table I could smell the delicious aroma of chocolate muffins. Mom always baked them on the first day of my school every year. They are always my favourite. But why do I smell them in this house?

As I neared the kitchen I found Robert moving to each corner of the polished platform making breakfast for both of us in a hurry. He soon saw me and greeted with a smile on his face. “Your mom once told me that you like chocolate muffins and she bakes them every year on your first day of school to wish you good luck. I thought I should continue the tradition your mom started.” He beams giving me a warm look and moves forward with a piece of cake in his hand to put it in my mouth.

The cake tasted very delicious just like the ones my mom prepared. I close my eyes and savour the flavour bringing one more to my lips unknowingly in the process. “Do you like the cake Princess?” Robert asks me with a lot of expectation? I did not want to please him especially after that stupid dream. I simply nod at him masking all my emotions. He looked dejected but immediately masks it with a cheering smile telling me that he would come and pick me up from the school in the evening. I do not respond and simply take the pack he hands me for my school break.

My dad, I did not know what he actually was. In every moment he felt very sweet and caring. He would take special care in getting my room decorated according to my liking. He would brief chefs of my favourite dishes. He was there to console and take care of me when I feared flying but again when I remember what he did to my mother I go back to phase one of a wilding tornado. He has to pay back for his betrayal on me and mom.

My school closes by 4 in the evening and every day as promised my dad would appear near the school gate in the parking lot with his freaking Lamborghini Reventon. I learnt it is one of the latest models among the costliest cars available in the world. Of course he is a damn billionaire but who cares about his money. I am with him for the promise I made to mom on her death bed. Ones I reach my permissible age I am out of his snapping mansion in the next second.

We were travelling back to his home or rather a castle as usual in complete silence. I never intended to talk to him. In the initial days he used to make short talks trying to sound like our relationship was normal but subsequently he understood my specifications. Since then he kept to himself and I was on my own. We spoke only when required. Nevertheless he took every care about me starting from speaking to my teachers about my progress in studies to my every domestic requirement.

Why being so cheesy? He can never fool me and win my heart like he did to mom. I am not her.

A few weeks later....

As usual we were having our dinner in silence when he spoke to me. “Princess your birthday is approaching within two days. What do you wish to have on your birthday?” He cheers in excitement. “Earlier I bought gifts to you of my choice but now I have the opportunity of asking you in person.”

“You did?” I ask him in disbelief. He simply nods his head. “All the gifts you received on your previous birthdays from your mom’s employers and friends were actually the presents I purchased for you.” He states to me in an unbootable expression. But his emotions change swiftly the next moment. “Now that I have you I can buy you anything of your choice my sunshine. You only have to name it.” He puts off in glee. “I want to make up for our lost time about which I sincerely regret.” He accentuates nurturing all the affection and care. I raise my head from the plate filled with food and look at him solid, right into his eye. “Is it so? Then I wish some solitude Robert.” I saw him flinch the moment I addressed him with his name with no trace of endearment. “I wish I never have to speak or look at you and listen to your dramatic talks.” I answer him with a cold emotionless expression.

The brightness on his face was gone within seconds. He did not ask me about anything further. His vision was directed back to his plate. He finished his dinner fast and the next minute he was out of home.

Am I missing on something? Does my dad really love and care for me? If so why did he leave me and mom so heartlessly abandoning us to fetch for our own needs?