CHAPTER 5

ALYSSA'S POV

A resounding slap landed on my mom's face making her fall to the ground.

"What a bitch you are. You and your slut excuse of a daughter. How dare she get pregnant in my house and under my nose!!"

My dad was outrageous. even in his drunk state, he was mad after my mom decided to inform him about my pregnancy. But I can't let him blame her. It wasn't her fault. He was about dragging her off the floor when I ran to him in tiers.

"Father please stop. It wasn't her fault. Mother never knew when it happened."

"But she did know it happened."

He turned to me and grabbed my hair tightly.

"Fifteen years old pregnant girl. Aren't you just a whore. Opening those stupid legs of yours to get fucked." He spat.

"It wasn't my fault either father. I was rapped." I cried.

Suddenly, he let go of me and erupted into laughter.

"How pathetic. Who would want to sleep with someone like you. Do you think you're that pretty? Although, you'd ruined my plan of selling off your virginity. You skank."

He slapped me now in anger.

"Am sick of this place. I don't even want to see your faces." He outaged then walked out. I crawled up to my mum who was already in tiers.

How long could I hid it from the world. I was carrying a child which was a result and the product of rape.

______________§§§§§§§________________

I stood Infront of my room mirror for some reason even I don't understand. I tried examining myself. Strangely, I had slowly began to change. My breast and gotten fuller than before. Not as if it was small, but at least okay to be called a normal size. But now...

I raised my hands to my breast and squeezed lightly but immediately stopped with a hiss. It hurt and aches, alot. Indeed my breast had gotten a little swollen and heavier.

Slowly, I moved my hands to the him of my top, then raised it up to my breast level. Staring at my reflection through the mirror, my hand gazed at my still flat stomach. It isn't obviouse yet, but for how long.

I long will I keep my mom with this shame and embarrassment?

Her only crime was ever birthing a child like me.

My hand romed round my belly and the doctor's words right before we left the hospital rang again in my head like a flash back.

___________________________________

"I advised She doesn't gets an abortion." She suggested. And my mom's eyes had glimed.

"What? Why not?" She had asked.

"Listen. Your daughter is still quite young and has a whole life ahead of her, we understand that. But due to the scan, we detect she is an alcer patient and it's close to a bim stage. Are you aware of that?" She asked and my mum nodded.

"Well, you should know that for a stage of an alcer patient like hers it's quite risky to get pregnant especially regarding her tender age. Her system isn't that matured yet and as the foetus develops into a baby, it's starts to react. Moving and kicking in it's mother's belly, and in her case, the baby could kick directly to her inner wounds." She explained. My mom looked at me sadly and shook her head.

"Oh, my baby. That could be really painful." Her voice cracked.

"Yes. That would be part of the reason why we don't suggest an abortion for her cause you can't predict the baby's state and it could end up getting bad for her."

My mom taught for a few seconds before responding. She sat beside me and pat my hair.

"I believe that the Lord would protect you." She whispered, kissing my forehead. "Don't worry baby. Am here for you."

____________________________________

"What are you doing?"

I was too engrossed to know when my Mom had walked in. Through the mirror, I could see her holding a tray of plate. I quickly let down my top and turned, heading to my bed.

"Nothing."

I shrugged as I sat. She came beside me and placed the food on the bed as she sat.

"I know what you are thinking?"

Came her voice after observing.

"Don't." She blurt, shaking her head.

"Mom I-"

"I was married to a minyak, yet I stayed put. Not as if I didn't have a choice. But I just felt it was wrong to have let my guard down and chickened out, at least for your sake. I care about nothing else in this world but you. So everything I do is for your sake." Her voice was calm as she pat my hair.

"But Mom, I don't want to end up like that. Feeling pains and guilt for the rest of my life. And please try to understand. I can't let a silly act ruin my life."

I was ruined already. So I wasn't going to keep the memory of a shameful act.

"Do you think I also never dreamt big. And you heard the doctor, I can't risk lossing you. And In life, we don't always get to call the shots. I hope you would learn to understand."

I looked away and staired out the window. I really can't seem to figure her out sometimes.

"You haven't had anything to eat all morning. So I brought you this."

I looked at her as she turned to open the plate, handed it over to me with a fork. It was spaghetti sauce with some olives at the toppings.

My stomach twitched at the sight of it.

Holding the fork, I digged in. It felt odd as the aroma hit my nostrils, which was unusual cause it wasn't my first time eating it.

Stuffing into my mouth, I forced myself to chew down.

"You know, when you were little, you did alot kind of funny things. You were a little genius. You've always been." As my Mom continued to talk, I was down on my third spoon when it couldn't go anymore. Everything from my stomach came rushing back to my throat and I jerked towards the bathroom, puking it all into the toilet.

I felt my mom's hand patting my back in the process and once done, I washed up.

"I thought you loved that?" She raised a brown.

"I guess not anymore." I signed.

LUNCH BREAK

It was lunch break at school while I spent almost half my day in the toilet, throwing up what's left of a food in my body.

I have been so distained. No friends or whatsoever. And surprisingly, I haven't been seeing Amelia at school. Would have tried giving her a call but my phone was already jupertised.

My bud hit me again and I threw up over the sink.

"What's wrong with you?"

I gasped at the voice only to look behind and see it was Ruby. I wipped my mouth.

"Why do you care?"

Even though am worried about her, am not sure if I should trust her anymore.

"I know you are mad at me. But can we at least seat to talk?" She suggested.

CHAPTER 6

____________ALYSSA'S POV____________

We sat under a tree where eyes wouldn't really be on us as I staired at her patently waiting for her to begin.

"Okay. I heard about what happened and am sorry. I really am." She began.

"So you really think it was okay to ditch me huh!"

"I didn't mean to okay. I was scared that you would tell everyone that I was the one who took you to a club where you got wasted." She mumbled.

"You also thought I got wasted?" I scoffed. "It doesn't matter. No one believes me anyway."

"Okay. Let's just forget it okay. Like, what could possibly go wrong?" She tried covering up with a smile.

"Am pregnant, Ruby." I thought it was wise of her to know since she was the main start cause of it.

"What! How is that even possible?"

She glared at me in disgust. Is she really a friend to be called?

"How is it possible? Ruby, when you have sex then you are most likely to get pregnant but unfortunately for me, I didn't have the previlage here because I was raped instead, at the fucking night club you took me to while you disappeared on me without any traces." I grunt but tried to keep my voice low inorder not to call attention.

"So did you tell anyone about my involvement?" Her voice was now calm and I shook my head in response, looking at my hands on the table.

"It doesn't matter. Am ruined anyway."

We both went silent. Then she signed.

"How many people knows about the pregnancy?" She asked.

"No one. Except my mom and the doctor who announced it."

I felt like it wasn't necessary to have said that last part but it was already out.

"Okay. I know of a doctor. So why don't you go for an abortion?"

My eyes beamed on hers.

"The doctor had said it was risky."

I had explained but she shook her head.

"That doctor isn't capable then. I have a doctor that would never disappoint. And don't worry, the costs are on me." She smiled but I wasn't sure to go on with this. She sensed my hesitation and replied.

"Alyssa, please don't think too much about it. I wouldn't want my best friend to leave her life carrying a bastered's child and to ruin her dreams."

She was right at this point. Carrying the baby would mean sacrificing alot of my dreams and future. And I can't let that happen.

I hoped you would forgive me mom.

I nodded at Ruby and with a smile, she grabbed my hand.

"Come with me."

______________________________________

It's been days already since Ruby took me for the abortion and it happened. The doctor had said I might notice some pains and few blood but it was normal. And indeed, it came.

Sometimes I would wake up in the morning and find my bed and panties stained but would quickly clean up before my mom would see it or notice.

I haven't told her yet cause if I do at this point, she might panic. But I do have the intentions of coming clean with her after I had fully recovered. After all, she's my mom.

Plus, Ruby and I had gotten closer once again. Not like before, but enough to make back up for lost times. Sure enough, I would be a fool to fully trust her that easily.

I headed to my school locker and was about to open when I felt someone spook me up from behind.

"Booo!!"

I jerked my chest only to see it was Amelia. She laughed.

"You scared me."

Her laughter went on as I said so.

"Am sorry. But you really are unbelievable. Didn't you at least missed me while I was gone?" She pout.

"I most admit. You do behave mysterious at times." I spoke as I took my textbooks out of the locker.

"Where were you anyways?" I was now facing her.

She signed.

"You know my mom had never liked you for some reasons."

I nodded, knowing how her mom could really be. They was a time, she treatened to get me out of school and make my mom's life a living hell if I don't stay away from her daughter. Like, who threatens a child in this century.

"I was sent to Panama." She added which got me surprised.

"She wanted you to switch schools because of me?"

She nodded.

"And she would make sure we never see eachother again."

Shish.

Some people are indeed sick. I mean, we are in our finals already.

"We are not some kind of runaway lovers now, are we?"

She laughed.

"Now forget about that. I heard you've been pretty closer back with Ruby."

She said her word in a groaning manner as I shut my locker.

"Actually, it's not really that way. Quite more complicated." I prolonged.

"What do you mean?"

I was sure she would ask. Looking around to make sure no one was close, I moved closer to her and whispered.

"I was pregnant, and Ruby help me get rid of the baby."

I explained making her eyes shoot out.

"What!!"

She almost screamed to drag everyone's attention but quickly covered her mouth. Then glared at me.

"Don't look at me like that. If you were the one in my position that what would you have done." I frowned. She shouldn't let me regret tell her cause I only did because she is a great friend.

Removing the hand from her mouth, she signed.

"Does your mom knows?" She asked.

"She doesn't know about the abortion yet. But I would tell her when I feel is right." I explained but she shook her head.

"I still feel this is wrong."

She said and it just made me a little pissed.

"I don't care what anyone thinks anymore okay. It's my life so why should I let people be a judged of it." I hissed.

"Am sorry. I just want to make sure you are okay." Her soft tone proclaimed making me feel bad.

"Am fine as you can see so no need to worry too much." I assured as we walked to class. She departed to hers after giving me a hug and I went in for my chemistry practical which should be today.

Marcus was already seated on our table. He waved at me with a flash smile once spotted and all dargered eyes snapped at me making me almost freeze on my spot. Precisely, Marcus hardly smiled and there he was, even waving at me. Gulping down my dry throat, I walked towards our table ignoring the stairs.

"Hey!"

I greeted, putting my bag aside.

"You look nice." He commented making me try hiding my blush.

"Thanks." I smiled.

Mr sky walked in with a question paper which he shared all round the table as he spoke.

"So the first test is going to be a partnership test. You'll group with another group partner to identify the chemical and Iupac naming of some equations you would be asked to mix. The questions are all written on the papers."

He explained. A girl at the back raised her hand up for questioning.

"Yes, miller."

"Mr sky. Are we suppose to choose our opposite partners?" She asked.

"No. The question would choose you instead. Only two people as same questions. So I would start with you miller. Come out to read your question, so who so ever finds it similar would be your partner."

Everyone looked at each other, nervous of who would be their partner.

Miller stood Infront of the class and hexitately, she read her questions.