Zara's POV

I can't remember at what point I fell asleep last night but somehow I did. Waking up to the smell of coffee, I thought last night was just a dream. Not just any kind of dream, but a nightmare.

But the ache in my chest, my stuffy nose, and eyes that I can just feel how swollen they are were the wake-up call I needed before the memories rush back and hit me like a freight train.

It is real. The guy I just tied the knot with, the one I thought was the love of my life, belongs to someone else.

The man in question is standing by the window, looking outside like he's deep in thought. He's bare-chested and the sunlight reflecting on his toned abs and chiseled face makes him look almost heavenly and peaceful.

Like he could feel me staring at him, he turns and finds me standing by the door. He smiles like last night was just a scene taken out of my imagination. Like we're just some lovey-dovey couple on their honeymoon and he wasn't leading a dual life. Like our love wasn't destroyed by his lies.

"Good morning, baby," he says softly as he goes to pour coffee in a mug.

I have the sudden urge to throw the mug and coffee on his face but I don't. I just sit down at the table and I take in the different meals. I doubt I'll be able to eat. Not when my throat aches from trying to hold back my sobs throughout the night while he slept peacefully.

"I ordered everything I could so we could have different options. What would you like?" He smiled as he spoke but when I didn't answer, he continued. "You should try something. We have a long day planned. The yacht, the visit to the museum, and dinner at that restaurant you've been singing about since before the wedding."

"Stop." I hit the table, making everything on it shake. "Just...just stop pretending like we're a happy couple."

The smile falls from his face as he kneels before me. The food on the table was forgotten. "We could still be, Zee. Nothing has to change. I meant what I said last night. She means nothing."

"She's your legal wife," I said in a tone that said he was stupid for saying that.

"My father was in a bad place. He signed contracts he couldn't get out of without risking everything he had worked so hard for. I was just twenty-two. Her family had some kind of leverage and my dad forced me."

"You could have just told me before we went ahead to do all this." I threw my hands up in the air.

"I know. I know. Trust me I wanted to do that many times but I didn't..."

"You wanted to tie me to you and make sure I didn't leave you," my voice was calm but the tension continued to grow between us.

So many emotions crossed his face. Guilt and shame being one of them as he bowed his head and whispered. "You're the best thing that happened to me and I didn't want to lose you."

"Well. You already did and..."

His body stiffened like he's preparing for the blow I'm going to deliver with my words and I make sure I deliver.

"I don't know who I married anymore but you're the worst mistake I've ever made." I watch as he grows a few years older before my eyes.

"You don't mean that, Zee. I know you're angry but..."

"I'm pregnant," I blurt out and he freezes.

The truth would make him hold on harder and deeper to me. It'll be good for what I have planned out. I want to give him hope only to crush it later. Only then will he feel what I felt.

"Pregnant?" Shock fills his eyes and then joy. "Are you serious?"

"Yes."

"This is great news, baby. This child will be the bridge we need. I'll fight even harder for us to have a stable and peaceful home." He holds my shoulders and rain kisses on my face.

I use my hands and push at his chest. "You don't have to do that cause I won't be for long. I'll take care of it."

All the blood drains from his face as he looks at me in horror.

"No," he screams. "Don't say that, Zara. Please, you can't do it. We'll work it out. I promise." He tries to hold me but I push him away.

"Don't touch me. I have already made my decision."

He just looks at me helplessly as I get up and leave to get ready for the day. I would still have my fun.

I was right. I didn't even taste anything on the table.

******

There's even more pretending as we go through the activities he has planned for the day. He's more mindful, attentive, and touchy. He's probably wishing I'll change my mind. Good luck. The yacht trip passes in a blur. Every time a stranger compliments how good we look together, I have to force a smile while he gives me a look that says 'everyone can see it' as he holds my waist.

I wait until he's distracted in a conversation with the captain and make my way to the lower deck with his phone. I schedule an appointment with a clinic in my name and delete the record. It's a trace I'll want him to find later.

When I make my way back, his eyes follow me till I sit but he doesn't ask anything.

I fake a headache and lock myself in the bathroom once we get back to our suite. I sit on the floor and lean back against the wall as the weight of everything comes crashing down on me.

I'm not going to kill my baby but he will think I have. And if he believes that, he won't go looking for us.

I hear him through the door as he walks around the room while on the phone with someone but I don't care to listen but I still grab a few words. His voice sounds soft and broken like a wounded animal, and for a brief moment, I wonder if I'm doing too much and dealing with it in the wrong way.

"I'm not sure she'll ever forgive me. No, I can't. At least not yet."

He should keep thinking time is on his side and he's the one playing me. But I'm about to play the biggest game in his history.

I close my eyes going through everything in my head. My real visit to the clinic but a fake procedure, the anonymous message from someone I received offering help if I ever needed it. I'm not one to trust a stranger but I'll take any way I can out.

By morning, I'll start doing everything I have planned out. The baby would supposedly be 'taken care of' by tomorrow and by the end of the week, Zara Winterborn will be dead. And gone.

Adrian Leighton will spend the rest of his life regretting what he did and what he could have had. Us.

(Zara's POV)

Nobody likes the smell or atmosphere of clinics and I'm no exception. The disinfectant is so strong and the air is so tense and always ready to deliver bad news. One would think some good things don't happen there. Like the birth of a child.

Not in my case though. I'm here to make sure my husband believes I took out our baby. That's why I showed up early at the clinic. You never know who he might know so the lesser chance of bumping into someone.

I've already fulfilled all the requirements; my name is on the appointment list, I have already filled out the basic information, and the nurse has been strictly told to say I've been seen, treated, and discharged in case Adrian calls. I know he is capable of finding out where I amand what I'm doing.

My baby is in good shape, safe, and alive. No one is going to touch them. So there will be no treating.

Seems he finally noticed my absence because he has been blowing up my phone with calls and messages.

Adrian: Where are you, Zee?

Adrian: Please, pick up your phone. I'm worried.

Adrian: This is not the way to fix things. Don't do something you'll regret.

Regret? The only regret I have is marrying him. I don't reply and just put my phone on silent.

As soon as I do that, the nurse calls my name and I follow her into the room to see the doctor. She checks my vitals, does the ultrasound which gives me much relief that my baby is okay.

She fills out my file and I slide over a brown envelope containing money to ensure she keeps my secret. In return, she gives me a folder that has my false results.

"The folder equally contains post-treatment instructions for you. Things you should and should not do for a while." she lowers her voice to a whisper before she continues. "It would also require that you act weak for some days so it looks real. And please, no sex. Don't fail to remember that you're supposed to be healing."

I nod and thank her for her help. I gradually walk outside and step into the sunny and hot weather. There's a black car sitting on the street and for a second, I think it's my secret helper. But no.

Adrian is pacing by the car. He stops when he notices me approaching. His jaw is clenched so hard like he's stopping himself from saying something. His hands are shaking but he buries them in his pockets.

We just continue to glare at each other until he snaps.

"Get in the car." No softness in his tone as he turns and walks to his side.

I enter the car and once we close the doors, the tension and silence weigh heavily than before.

He is holding the steering she so tightly that I fear it will break. His knuckles are white, his eyes seem unfocused and he is driving so fast. Is he trying to kill us?

"Adrian slow down. Are you trying to get us killed?"

"I'm not like you. But what if I was? You already took away something precious from us," his voice sounded broken.

"Stop the car. Now."

He does and it almost sends me flying through the windshield. I grip my chest in horror.

"Are you out of your mind?"

"Yes, I am out of my mind," he shouts, and I squeeze my back to the door.

I have never witnessed him behave so out of line.

"Why, Zara? Why did you do it?" he repeatedly slaps the steering wheel.

"It is what needed to be done. It was the right thing." My voice was so calm.

"How can you be so calm right now? You didn't even make me understand that you already booked an appointment to kill our baby. Why didn't you tell me?"

I laughed but it sounded so fake and humourless. "What exactly would you have done if I told you? Wait, let me guess," I acted like I was deep in thought. "Oh, I know. You would have bought me flowers or an expensive gift to try and convince me to keep the baby. No, Adrian. I don't want to a reason to be connected to you for the rest of my life. I don't want any more of your lies."

The words sound unfamiliar to my ears as I say them. Because once upon a time, that was my lifelong dream. Not anymore.

"I married you because I love you and that baby was proof of our love for each other."

"Your real wife can still give you a baby if you desperately want one."

"She's not my..." he stops mid-sentence and runs a hand down his face. "I haven't touched her since we got married. She's just that on paper. She's nothing but an arrangement and I won't let her carry my child."

"Am I supposed to feel better based on what you just said?" I ask as I raise my brows.

"I'll dissolve the marriage. I'll make it right again. For us." His eyes are bloodshot and desperate.

My heart skips. "You can't fix what's already dead."

"Zara..."

"Just drive, Adrian. I need to rest," I say, holding on to my stomach and closing my eyes like I'm in pain.

That shuts him up as he resumes driving. Once at the hotel, he quickly gets out to help me out of the car. I don't argue when he holds me and leads me to our room. I'm taking this acting so seriously.

When we get to the room, he helps me lie on the bed. "You should rest."

He keeps his phone on the side table and then takes a seat at the foot of the bed, his head supported in his hands. His phone rings but he doesn't pick it up.

"Who is it? Aren't you going to answer it? Could be important." My voice holds no emotion.

"Probably a wrong number," he says quickly picking up the phone.

"How do you know that. It could be your wife calling to ask when you'll be back. You should answer it." I sound bored.

He freezes for a second before leaving the room to take the call.

"Liar," I whisper to myself after he leaves.

I take out my phone and reread the message from my anonymous sender.

Unknown: If you ever need an escape, reach out to me. No cost or strings attached.

Who could it be? Did they already know about the 'wife'? It came before the honeymoon so they should know. But the real question is how did they find me and why do they want to help me? I just hope I'm not jumping into even deeper problems. Hope I'm not about to traffic myself. I'll worry about that after I'm gone.

I can only hope I'll not be in too deep. Finally making a decision, I type my response with shaky fingers.

"I'm ready to disappear"

The answer comes almost immediately.

Unknown: Follow the instructions I'll send. Nobody should know.

I lock my phone and lie back. I close my eyes and slow down my breathing just as Adrian returns and settles beside me. His fingers caressing my face.

"I'm sorry, my love. Deeply sorry for everything," he says as he kisses my forehead.

My heart skips and my chest tightens. I want to be convinced. But I can't back out now.

'I'm sorry too, Adrian.' I whisper in my mind.

(Zara's POV)

I stir in my sleep as I hear Adrian talk heatedly to someone. When I open my eyes, I find him talking on the phone with his back to me. The person is riling him up too much because he throws his head back and groans.

His next words are so firm that I'm sure it leaves the caller shocked but I finally understand why he's so disturbed.

"No, for fucks sake, Celeste. You can't come here. Can't you be patient? I already said I would be there soon and sort things out."

He steps outside and puts the call on speaker mode not knowing I'm awake. It gives me the opportunity to grab a few words.

"You have been saying that for two weeks now, Adrian. You better get back here and clean up this mess you have created. You have humiliated my family and my father is pissed. You know what you'll lose."

"I'm sure you can handle your father for a little longer. And another thing, Celeste. Don't you ever threaten me again. This marriage will be revisited when I get back."

"What are you saying? Are you trying to end our marriage over the phone? Be a man and tell that to my father yourself."

He doesn't reply again and just hangs up on her. "Damn it."

He dials another number. "I want you to move the money to the other account as soon as possible. Do it quietly. Celeste shouldn't find out."

I choose that moment to make a sound, letting the blanket fall from my body just as he drops the call. He enters the room and his eyes roam over my body.

"Work problems?"

"Nothing that you should worry about."

"Right. You're none of my business anymore."

'Stop it, Zara. It's too early for this," he snaps then takes a deep breath to calm himself.

"Certainly. I won't come between a couple's fight," I roll my eyes and get down from the bed.

I think he's about to leave the room but instead, he walks over to me and grabs me behind my neck. Not in a rough way but in a way that has my pulse racing as he looks into my eyes.

"I told you I'll dissolve it. I won't lose you. Not today or ever." The vow is heavy on his words and I worry when my helper will act on his promise.

I know two weeks have passed since I replied to his message. And one may be wondering if I changed my mind and decided to stay. Not in a million years.

Adrian has just been breathing down my neck. If I thought he was all over me before, then I was wrong. It has only gotten worse. He won't let me out of his presence. When he's not keeping an eye on me, he has one of his guards doing it.

I can't even explore the city on my own because he constantly wants to spend time with me. I don't know if he feels that I'm up to something but he's consuming all my time. There no personal time for me.

The day stretches out with even more pretense from both ends. After we have breakfast at the hotel's restaurant, we return to the room to spend the day doing nothing since we have no plans.

I could feel his eyes on me the entire time and it was not his usual affectionate look. He kept looking at me suspiciously but I simply focused on my food.

Now in the room, he doesn't go to his office. He sets his laptop on the table across from me and I frown.

"Don't you have work to do?" I ask as I raise my brows.

"I want to work from here today," he says casually.

"You mean you want to watch me closely?"

"Whatever you want to think," he says and starts working.

I try scrolling through my phone but it's useless. My mind keeps going back to the unknown person and why they have been so silent. Could it be that it was only a joke or a wrong number?

I've put so much hope on whosoever it is that I'll crumble if they don't come through. I don't really care who it is at this point. It could be a serial killer with random numbers for all I care.

The instructions they promised to send haven't come in yet and there's nothing I can do until I have them.

So many thoughts are running through my mind and it feels like I'm suffocating. I need air. It's finally afternoon and I can't take it anymore, so I decide to take a walk outside.

'I'm going out for some air," I tell him as I stand.

"Give me a minute and I'll join you," he says typing fast.

"No. I want to do it alone."

His head snaps up at that. "Why?"

"Because I need to clear my head."

He looks at me suspiciously before nodding. "Fine. Make sure you're back in thirty minutes."

"I'm not your child," I tell him as I leave.

The weather is hot and the sun is shining so brightly. I walk into a coffee shop and as soon as I sit, my phone vibrates.

I can feel my heartbeat increase while I read the message again.

Unknown: Be ready at 1am tonight. There'll be a black car waiting at the back exit. No bags or phone. I'll have the necessary things ready for you.

"Finally," I breathe. Even if it means cutting all ties and erasing myself.

Me: I'll be ready.

I put my phone in my bag and try to relax. I hope I'll be out before Adrian finds out.

I get back to the hotel hours later and find that Adrian has abandoned his laptop. He's now holding a glass of whisky while the bottle sits on the table.

His sleeves are bent to the elbow and I take a moment to admire the veins bulging on his arms. Something that always had me drooling. I seriously need to snap out of it.

"What took you so long?" He asked when I walked in and his voice sounded like he had had more than a glass or two.

"I don't remember having a curfew."

"What are you playing at, Zara?"

My pulse picks up. "Nothing. I'm tired. I need to rest."

"Sit down."

I sit.

"Are you trying to punish me by pulling away? Is that what this game is?"

My heart calms down a bit. He doesn't know.

"Game? You really think this is a game? Keep thinking then," I say as I stand to leave.

He grabs my hand before I take two steps away. He wraps his hand around my throat as he whispers in my ear.

"Let me give you a taste of what you'll be forgoing if you decide to leave me," he says and kisses me. His mouth tastes of whisky. "Can I make love to you now?"

He asks because I've been turning him down for the last two weeks with the excuse that I'm healing. I had to make it seem real alongside the prenatals I've been taking which he thinks are to support my recovery process.

I don't push him away. He takes that as a push to keep touching me. I hate that my body still craves the man he was.

I let him kiss me and claim me for the last time. My mind forgets my escape plan for a moment. He pounds into me. Grunting and breathing heavily until we both come.

I wait until he's in the shower to pull out my phone. I delete all the messages and call logs. Then I switch it off and place it at the back of the cupboard. I don't want him digging.

I get into bed before he gets out. I wait for the moment of execution.

We fall asleep. Not really for me. My eyes snap open and I check the bedside clock, it's 12:50am.

Perfect timing. Tonight I disappear from Adrian Leighton's life.